Today, my mom accused me of stealing money from her purse. Being totally innocent, I reminded her that the only other person with access to it is her boyfriend. She said she trusts him because she loves him. They've been dating for two months. I've been her daughter for 25 years. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I slipped money into my mother's purse after she refused to let me pay for lunch. She caught me in the act and thought I was stealing money from her instead. FML
Today, my mom accused me of stealing $350 from her. She didn't accuse my unemployed brother, who just bought a brand new iPhone. Even after he confessed to her, she thought he was covering for me. My brother has a criminal record for theft. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that my mom paid him to date me. FML
Today, I discovered that the reason my mom hasn't been noticing the extra cleaning I've done lately is because her boyfriend took credit when she asked about it; and was rewarded for it in bed. I helped him get with my mom. FML
Today, I witnessed my mother-in-law reach into my wife's purse and practically empty it out into her pocket. When I confronted her and called my wife into the room, both of them accused me of lying through my teeth, because I've always hated her. FML
Today, I discovered my own mother has been stealing money from me for months when I opened my savings box to find it empty. FML
Today, my mom stole my holiday money because she found it “near her bag” in my kitchen and “assumed it was hers” and she must have “forgotten it was in there all this time.” I demanded it back, but she’d already spent it on hair, nails, shoes, and a date night with dad. She won’t pay me back either. FML
Today, my grandma calls me, accusing me of theft. I was home all day and watching Orange Is The New Black. When I asked what I stole, she said her car keys. I don’t even have my license. I told her to look in her purse. She found them. FML
Today, my mother accused me of stealing pills; she looked all over my room and couldn't find them. When she went back to the pantry, she saw them on the shelf below where they were supposed to be. She then accused me of putting them there while she was searching my room. FML
Today, my mother "borrowed" money from my stash to help pay for her vacation to the Dominican Republic. The same trip I'm not allowed to go on. FML
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Top comments
laya_fml 26
Your mother trusts her boyfriend because she loves him, but she doesn't trust you. It kind of sounds like your mom just told you that she doesn't love you.
misspulkadot24 17
Some people fall head over heels in love. Or just fall on their heads in love. And crack their ******* skulls...in love. Either way.
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Comments (99)
jogihoppa8343 23
aww !! how the hell could she do that?? were you adopted btw?
misspennycakes 7
Your mum is a dog sorry OP :(
alfakennybody 10
That was cold
freshprizzle1 13
This is when you know it's time to save as much money as you can so you can move out as soon as possible.
Shmatterhorn 38
Love does some strange things, and this is evidence of that. I hope that your mom can see the truth, OP.
Reality_bites 14
Oh that really sucks, I bet the boyfriend put the idea in her head that it was the OP that stole the money. There is one way you can catch him out though - set up a video camera and make sure it records him taking more money and play the footage to them both. See him try to talk his way out of it then...
Satoaoi 13
disown her. maybe that will shock her stupid behind into reality. come the day she needs family she will only have her 2 month old bf and that if he hasn't dumped her yet
EvilUndead 9
Keep getting worked up over every little thing like this, and you'll have to disown entire universe.
fleur_de_fevrier_fml 23
I would not say disown her but a little distance and coldness should teach her a lesson
Satoaoi 13
I guess
CetaBabe 17
Jeremy Kyle show, here we come!!
da_directioner39 17
Oh My God! Congrats! You want a cookie?
Llama_Face89 34
Him rhymes with him? No way! Hate to break it to you but rhyming a word with the same word isn't rhyming at all. Grammar rules and all that jazz.