Today, I was taking a dump in a porta-potty at a fair. I had the runs really bad. All I have to say is that it's tough to take a shit that seems never-ending while other people outside are bitching at you and hammering on the flimsy door. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was in a public restroom taking a dump. It's difficult for me to do it in public, so to make it easier I kept telling myself, "Nobody's here, you're all alone." I then heard, "No, you're not." I didn't realize I was saying it out loud, or that I wasn't alone. FML
Today, I got stuck on an airplane for a while before takeoff. Someone decided it was a great time to get diarrhea while on the toilet, and we couldn't take off for safety reasons. FML
Today, I was on a plane heading home from vacation with the family, when went to relieve my bladder and stepped on someone's shit. They seemingly decided the floor was a better then the toilet. I walked all the way back to my seat with shit on my sandal, my sister thought I'd shat myself. FML
Today, I had to announce to the whole house that I was going the bathroom, because the lock on the door is broken. Before I had the chance to wipe, my dad loudly burst through the door, stark bollock naked, to take a shower. FML
Today, I was at the mall with my young daughter. I hate pooping in public but I really had to go so I brought her in with me. Thinking we were alone, I started to go and my daughter yelled, "Good job Mommy, you're using the potty like a big girl!" I then heard laughing. FML
Today, I was in the bathroom stall when a man made eye-contact with me through the crack in the door. I quickly looked away, but about a minute later I looked back to see if he was gone. He was still there and was actually trying to keep making eye-contact with me while I pooped. FML
Today, I was in the toilet. Some idiots thought it was funny to throw a water balloon into the cubicle. The balloon didn't pop, but fell in the toilet, sending my own urine onto my shorts. I had 4 hours left of school. FML
Today, I realized I can tell which one of my 6 roommates has taken a dump, just based on the smell emanating from the toilet. FML
Today, while on a date with my boyfriend, he broke up with me. The reason why? Because I took a dump in his bathroom and "that's inappropriate for girls." FML
Today, I got on the bus to go to work. I managed to get a seat, but an old lady who looked tired had to stand. I offered her my seat, but she glared at me, frowned and said, "Go fuck yourself." Everyone laughed as I sat there in dismay. FML
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Top comments
marinus_fml 20
*Cue the shitty puns*
TenderizeMe 0
MUWHA
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Comments (74)
bamfxd 4
That's what I call a shitty situation.
outsidebox 0
that's what I call a terrible over used pun.
bamfxd 4
I mean't to be corny. Thought that was pretty obvious.
heyhihello95 12
then you shouldn't have eaten all that shitty fair food.
mystifi 0
sounds like you're in a shitty situation.. ohwait..
TheShard1994 5
*sigh* The jokes here are getting more and more crappy..
mintcar 10
Porta-Potties are already absolutely disgusting to begin with. I feel sorry for anyone who had to go in after you.
MRSMOJORISIN_fml 0
Damn that sux af... Bet you were like really embarassed
SpectSelf 0
if they don't like it, they could've gone in the bushes or spelled their name on a wall.
cally72 0
you should have started shouting NNNGGGHHH EEEEEEEGGGHHH AHHHGG OOOHHHHPPHHH !!!!!! Lmfao.
iloveyuPooki 0
that sucks but I've always hated those people who crap in those things. it makes it impossible to use after you've seen what someone has done b4 yu + the smell.
BitchyMcBitch 1
YDI for ******** in a public toilet
babymaee 0
poor person going in after you. FTL