Today, while working in a blood drawing clinic, a mom sat in the chair holding her 4-year-old child, who kicked me square in the groin. Being a heavyset lady, I shrugged it off and collected the sample, while the child screamed, "Kicking worked on the last man that did this!" FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, walking home from work, I saw a little boy crying, so I crouched down to his eye level. I asked him what was wrong, his reply was to kick me in the groin. FML
Today, while trying to give an immunization to a "special" 13-year-old, I got spit on, kicked, almost bitten, and had a chair thrown at me. When it was all over, I flinched when the patient tried to hug me. Her mom called me a "b*tch" and I later found out she wasn't a "special" child. FML
When feral kids attack
Today, while waiting for my name to be called at the doctor's office, a little boy threw a Dixie cup full of water at me, making it look like I wet my pants. His mom just laughed and dragged him off. FML
Panic!
Today, I was at the doctor and I had to get a fingerstick in the lab to get blood drawn. There was a 6 year-old boy waiting to go next. He was terrified. His mother told him to, "Watch this brave girl go first." I panicked and began to hyperventilate. The kid fainted. FML
Today, I was working the register at a local grocery store. A kid about 5 years old was having trouble zipping his jacket. I reached out to help him and he started screaming "No bad touch bad touch!" and kicked me in the knee. Everyone looked. FML
Today, I was babysitting my neighbor's kid. We were playing in the yard, when he fell and got a small scratch on his leg. I gasp, and he takes a huge breath in and yells, "FUUUCK!!!" as loud as possible. The parents thought it was me, and the mother slapped me in the face. FML
Today, I was helping a 7 year-old student in my martial arts class with his kicks. My reward? A surprisingly powerful kick to the testicles. FML
Today, I was carefully drawing blood from a drunk who'd threatened to kill me if I hurt him, when another drunk behind me decided to take a piss on my leg. FML
Today, after recovering from surgery, I was leaving the clinic when a bucket of red paint was thrown at me, and a woman shouted that I was a murderer. I replied, "Sorry, would you like me to ask the doctor for my ovarian cyst back so I can pretend it was a fetus?" She hit me with her handbag. FML
Badass
Today, on a plane, a little kid was kicking the back of my son's chair. When the kid's mom went to the toilet, my son told this little kid, "If you kick my chair one more time, I’m going to kill your mom and you’ll never see her again." He stopped kicking but damn, what kind of son did I raise? FML
Top comments
Selene1090 26
Why would you insult and assault the people sticking a needle in you?
DragonMaiden7 15
Excellent example of horrible parenting. The first time the kid did that should have been the last time. Also excellent example of why I don’t want kids. Fuuuuuuuck the little monsters
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Comments (24)
real life problems 26
Did he just assume your gender?!
Selene1090 26
Why would you insult and assault the people sticking a needle in you?
julfunky 29
Because it’s a 4 year old. You don’t exactly think things all the way through at that age.
thedwyer96 18
needles terrify people. Not condoning the behavior but as someone who is scared of needles I understand the fight or flight aspect the kid was going through. To this day I internally panic when I have to get a blood draw or even a shot, and I'm a 22 Year old male with tattoos. Some people just can't deal with them.
Selene1090 26
I'm terrified of needles as well, even though I have piercings and tattoos. I understand that people respond to fear differently and that it's a child, but that isn't what my point was. My point was referring to the mother saying, "Kicking worked on the last man!" That to me, sounds like she is condoning that behavior or even encouraging it. So again, why would you insult and assault someone that is going to be poking you with a needle. If you have to get a shot or blood drawn regardless, I wouldn't be making them upset so they might be inclined to make it more miserable for you. not to mention, they are just doing their job. I could be misunderstanding this, but that's how I took this.
stranger_boy 7
You panic when you see a needle but you got tattooed? You paid to through the process of having needles inserted into your skins thousands of times, bleeding of feeling the pain when this is what scares you most !!? I think you can easily go and have a puncture now if you endured this you can endure a 3 second shot
Selene1090 26
It's called not letting your fears get the best of you. I like tattoos, so I got some despite being afraid of needles. I get necessary shots despite being afraid of needles.
Dave_Davington 35
If I had to hazard a guess, it would be to discourage them from trying to stick a needle in you. I could be wrong, but I have a feeling it's somewhere in that ball park.
raven_of_azarath 35
There’s a difference between choosing to endure it and being forced to for your own health.
Selene1090 26
I totally understand that. I was simply explaining why I get tattoos despite being afraid of needles. Do any of you understand context? Do you only see one comment and choose to comment, or do you read all the comments and just choose to ignore them all except for one? I've explained my comment. I'm not going to keep repeating myself for those of you too lazy to read.
DragonMaiden7 15
Excellent example of horrible parenting. The first time the kid did that should have been the last time. Also excellent example of why I don’t want kids. Fuuuuuuuck the little monsters
RichardPencil 32
Tell him you’re a eunuch. Let mommy explain that to him!
Davros 12
"Dont worry little man. you get a lolly pop after your turn. Hahaha haahahaaaa"
Glowworm56 27
"You know what he did? He kicked him in the penith. He was injured. Injured bad."
Earl_KarmasBitch 36
As bad as that was for you, I feel more sorry for the last guy.
RichardPencil 32
“That’s because he had balls, which are soft and weak. I have a ******, which is tough.”
Charlie Given 28
Got to love toddler's, God's little assholes 😋😂
Luke16eirb7deneuwn1 20
should have said "Improvise, Adapt, Overcome!" after shrugging it off