Today, while walking around town, some guy grabbed me from behind, clutched at my nipples, and said, "That's where I always imagined they were." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was out walking downtown. A woman walking behind the thought that my pants were hanging too low. She came over to me and yanked my pants up. FML
Today, at around 2am, I was walking through a parking lot to my car when a man walking behind me told me not to be scared. I turned around to tell him there was no problem. He was naked. FML
Today, at work, I was walking to the back office, and I didn't know my manager was following me. After I walked through the door, without looking, I reached behind me to close it. Instead of grabbing the door handle, I got a handful of his crotch. FML
Today, I was walking home when an old guy came up to me asking for directions. After I pointed him in the right direction, he held my hand, stroked my face then pushed me into a bush. FML
Today, a guy grabbed my ass at the mall. I whirled around and went to sock him. He ducked and I accidentally hit the elderly woman standing behind him in the face. To say all hell broke loose would be an understatement. FML
Today, I was out for a walk, wearing a T-shirt with a fist on it and the words "Bump it." A guy came up to me, looked at my shirt, shrugged, and punched me in the stomach. FML
Today, I was walking through a rough part of town, when a woman screamed that I'd stolen her bag. I was tackled to the ground by a large guy, who then gave my bag to her. FML
Today, I was walking to school with my earphones in, when someone tapped me on the shoulder. I was shocked, and whirled around to hit him in the crotch. I soon realized he was just trying to return the commuter pass I'd dropped at the station. FML
Today, I was walking on a main street downtown. Suddenly, I felt someone slap my butt. I turned around, expecting to be my girlfriend who was to meet me there and almost gave an old homeless man a kiss on the cheek. FML
Today, I was getting catcalled downtown by a guy I've never seen before. Then he told me he knows where I live, and accurately described my apartment while he followed me for 2 blocks. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Despereaux 15
Kick him in the balls and say "just where I thought they would be too"
brebabee793 13
what a creep!
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (186)
wynnona 17
What the what?? O_O
Prolux_fml 23
Or you could just invest in nothing. I think the best way to deal with a nipple touching man is just to stand back and ask him what the **** he's doing.
worldclassrager 41
Creeper...doesn't matter if this was on you or a chick run away and maybe report him as a perv.,,
djinnyf 12
You should have scratched a DNA sample off that asshole.
creativecreation 8
That's when I would feign interest, get his info and file a lawsuit.
taytym 6
where else would they be?
kitsune309 15
Hilarity brought to you by OP's gender.
MaxPlain69 8
We are definitely in a social decline...
WhiteCrimson 23
Thats creepy! Very flippen creepy
ghil_fml 7
was it really der? :)