Today, while vacationing, a small boy asked to see the baby I was holding, wrapped in a blanket. I showed him, and his face reflexively scrunched up. The boy's mother came and apologized to me. Her face scrunched up too. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was sitting down in a store when a stroller stopped by me. While the parents were fixing the strap, the baby looked at me, gasped, looked at me again, gasped, and then screamed. Ten minutes later, another baby looked at me and screamed. My face scares babies. FML
Today, I took my very talkative toddler to a grocery store. As we passed a woman in an aisle, my kid pointed and said loudly, "Mummy, why does that lady have such a funny face?" I had to awkwardly apologize while my face went beet red. FML
Today, I waved at a baby while standing in line in a store. It started screaming. Its mom looked over in mild concern and gave me a disturbed glare before moving to the next checkout counter over. FML
Today, I was at a restaurant when I made eye contact with a baby across the room. It smiled at me, so I smiled back. The baby immediately started screaming. Everyone stared at me like I'd just threatened it. FML
Today, my one-year-old son threw up on the man sitting next to us on a plane. I felt bad and apologized profusely. When I tried to give him money for dry cleaning, he slapped me. FML
Today, I was changing my son's diaper when he said "Momma." Astonished that he'd finally spoken, I clapped and smiled proudly. My clap scared the crap out of him. Literally. FML
Today, I went to the hospital to visit my aunt and her newborn baby. The receptionist gave me the room number, and I went and my aunt was in the bathroom so I cuddle the baby, only to find that the woman who came out of the bathroom was a complete stranger. I was holding her baby. FML
Today, while out walking with my son in a stroller, a couple passed by and the girl smiled sweetly at him. It made me really happy, until we'd passed and I heard her say, "What? You're supposed to smile at babies, even if they look weird." FML
Today, I was in a grocery store when a little boy ran up out of nowhere, hugged my leg, then said, “Mommy!” I looked down and said, “Hey there, kiddo!” Right then, his actual mom walked up and gave me a look that seemed like it could set me on fire. The kid then looked up at me and said, “You’re prettier than my real mom.” FML
Today, as I was just finishing my grocery shopping, a little girl and her mother walked past. Seeing the little girl staring at me, I waved. The girl then pointed to me and asked her mother "Mommy, is that man pregnant?" FML
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Top comments
MOOSE786 8
All babies look like potatoes to me
jentrynicole 20
How new of a baby is it? Because most newborns look like little aliens until are they a couple weeks old or so.
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Comments (50)
NigelHD 13
I think she's saying the baby pooped
Magnoxidans 19
Nah, read the title of the post "NotAnUglyBaby"
tormcn 26
Maybe the baby was a cabbage patch kid.. I'd scrunch my nose too.
gopackgo97 13
just pray for puberty
slappygecko 21
It was all a dream
bad_boyfriend 10
To be fair, a lot of babies are ugly, not all of them grow up ugly.
Ben14h 22
Maybe the baby was smelly (as in, well you know)? But I guess you would have noticed that
marcranger 29
I wouldn't worry about it, OP. All babies are hideous to me. At least that boy will know better than to ask in the future!
meghanclean 17
Hey, I thought my kid was a little cherub when she was a new born but she looks like a shriveled up alien in photos. She's a chubby cherub now tho
more4me 27
is that her in your profile photo ? she looks adorbs!
NakedandAfraid 14
The wording of this post confuses me. Was it your baby?
Jayms_fml 32
Same here!!! If it was her baby, she would have wrote "my baby."
Captain_Debilos_fml 13
you should have aborted