Today, while studying in the middle of the night, my dad came home drunk. I helped him to the sofa and after clearing up his mess, he started going on about how useless my sister Vanessa was, and how good a daughter I am. I am Vanessa. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my dad came home drunk and called me hot. FML
Today, while I was studying for an exam, my younger sister came home extremely drunk and threw up all over herself and her bed. I later got grounded for not setting a better example. FML
Today, I went back home. My drunk mother was screaming at my drunk step-dad about a fight that happened four years ago. My little sister was looking in the mirror practicing her "orgasm face", while the neighbors were dancing outside, coked out and naked. FML
Today, my fiancé came home drunk with some girl. Then he told her that I was his sister. FML
Today, my whole family was sitting in the kitchen. My sister was stoned and passed out in our dog's bed. My dad was drunk, yelling, "Who's your daddy?" at his plate of barbecued meat, and my mom just sat there with that, "What the hell happened to my life?" look on her face. FML
Today, my dad was drunk and angry, so I went to the neighbor's since I didn't know what to do. He was so nice and comforted me as I cried. Then his wife came home, called him a pedophile, beat me, and threw me out. FML
Today, my drunken mother told me I'm just like my father and that I don't give a fuck about her. She's living in my home and drinking my wine. FML
Today, my dad got drunk at a party and flashed me and my friends. FML
Today, I've been staying with my parents while I have time off from school. They got drunk and started an entire family fight because my dad made pizza and my mom is lactose intolerant. She insists my dad did it on purpose because, "he's an asshole and knows I can't eat cheese." FML
Today, my family yelled at me for being a "selfish disappointment." My crime? Not being able to help my sister's boyfriend do his homework while I'm working on my class finals. FML
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Top comments
Mattfail 0
Wow.... Your dad must suck
Nonamerequired 0
I think he's more likely to mess up the names than the faces.
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Comments (80)
Shizden 0
YDI because you have a ******.
Michaeela 9
Wow that was extremely low you sexist turd -.-
ericalew_xo 0
YDI for being useless. Haha just kidding. That sucks but he was drunk. So who cares?
DameGreyWulf 1
Hrmph. Sounds like my dad... definitely FYL. Also 13, someone mentioned it before on another FML, but "drunk actions speak sober truths"
Thizzkidsgotgame 7
Drunk actions speak sober "opinions".
FreddyLunch 0
Are you Vannessa Hudgens? If so will you send me some naked pics?
tangerine_12 0
No idiots he's saying that he thought she was her sister. He probably just got the names mixed up.
Darkon 0
While he thinks you are your sister kick him in the nuts a couple of times. Then you may be the useless daughter but atleast you didn't kick him in the nuts. :)
oh_mi_shizzle 0
hmmm... this is a tough one... did he confuse your names or your faces? I don't think it matters, at least now u know your dad hates one his two daughters... so that sucks... either way, FYL OP, you had to help out your drunk dad which should be bad enough... and then u find out ur dad might kinda hate u... sooo... keep on his good side is my suggestion. I'm sure ur a good kid, don't let him bring u down. :)
xxMiiNii 0
FYL for having to be compared to a sibling. And you lost.
x_Leopard_x 1
That stinks. =(
PoeticPixie 0
This isn't that bad. He probably mistook your faces and thought you were your sister, to which he was saying that the person helping him was useful, and the one not helping him was useless. If he thought your sister was helping, then he would say you're useless, but he really meant that your sister is useless. Get over it
xxMiiNii 0
That does make sense. Especially because he seemed to be very drunk.