Today, while on a crowded public bus, a cute girl asked if she could sit next to me. Problem is, I didn't hear correctly and thought she asked if anyone was sitting next to me. I answered no, causing her to walk off angrily and earning me several disgusted stares from other passengers. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was on the bus, heading to work, when the girl beside me started yelling at me, claiming I was staring down her shirt. I did no such thing, but the driver nonetheless stopped the bus and made me get off, all under the withering glares of the other passengers. FML
Today, a total stranger on the bus called me hideous and threw a soda in my face. I only asked him if the seat next to him was taken. FML
Today, I was riding the bus home from college. I was standing in the aisle and there was a rather cute girl sitting next to me. The bus came to an abrupt stop, I tripped, and fell into her lap. She shrieked, "Eww! Get off me!" and shove me onto the floor of the bus. Nice to know I'm revolting. FML
Today, I had my headphones on while on the bus. I didn't realize how loud the music was till the woman sitting next to me punched me for changing her favorite song and then "ignoring her" when she asked me to put it back. FML
Today, a lady on the bus came up to me and asked if she could sit down. Thinking she meant the seat next to me, I said sure. She meant my lap. FML
Today, a pretty girl joined the line at the bus station. I let her skip the line and go before me so I could sit next to her. After she bought her ticket, I realized there were no more seats left on that bus. I was told to get off, and had to take the next bus, sitting next to a snoring old man. FML
Today, I was sitting on a bus. I'm deaf. An old lady looked very angry at me and started talking. Then she looked like she was screaming. I had to type on my phone that I'm deaf. Apparently, I'd been stepping on her foot. She decided to poke me in the eye and type, "Now you're blind too." FML
Today, while on the bus, I found out the seat I'd taken was the preferred spot of a very hostile and extremely overweight freshman. Instead of letting me find different place to sit, she half sat on me, and completely ignored my attempts to dislodge myself all the way to school. FML
Today, I was sitting on the bus and as I'm quite short my legs were dangling. Some guy, who wasn't looking where he was going, tripped over my foot and went flying. He and everyone else on the bus glared at me like it was deliberate. The man next to me even changed seats in disgust. FML
Today, as I walked on to the bus, the girl I liked whispered something to her friend. Curious, I asked what was so funny. She said she never realized that when I got on, I shook the bus. FML
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Top comments
Pleonasm 36
You should have follow up with: "I meant: how about we both get off the bus now and I'll take you back to my place, for some hot, steamy...broccoli. And more." That always works for me.
5t3ff1k4h 47
Time to turn up your hearing aid.
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Comments (90)
5t3ff1k4h 47
Time to turn up your hearing aid.
SuperKnuckels 6
OP nothing good comes out of 1 word replies. should've said "No, go right ahead."
DeadxManxWalking 27
Well it was a crowded bus. A hearing aid can be a bit ineffective or not much helpful in this kind of situation.
mk58 31
I'm thinking that he probably had headphones in. A lot of people do that on buses. :)
lilhellian 27
People assume hearing aids help in every situation, but in personal experience I'd rather avoid the situation. Mainly because it becomes a jumbled mess..
ShyAnn29 15
It's common to misunderstand people sometimes, it can be very annoying though!
dalink 24
Time to turn down the homicidal voices in your head... They get so loud sometimes.
OriginalimoaN 15
The voices in my head combined with the people in the bus are always too loud. That's why it's best to stick with the friendly smile and gesture to the open seat.
doglover100 29
Hearing aids make everything a jumbled mess in a crowded place.
Peacelove0404 26
Maybe it's time to visit the doctor to get your hearing checked
JenkJenks 6
The time to do that was before this incident. Now his one true love is gone forever. It's too late.
ShyAnn29 15
Be positive, it's never to late for true love!
evig_fml 16
I hope she wasn't the love of your life, because if so you messed that up big time. Here's to being forever alone.
wlddog 14
This is exactly why when you talk to people, you give a complete thought. Not one word comments. OP could have finished the "no" with " No, you can sit here."
welandedonthemoo 5
That's what I would've said
wlddog 14
Well then my work here is done.
Fsvb 32
40 Exactly what I was thinking! I also learned it is somewhat rude to answer with only one word. But sometimes you just don't think enough and forget to add anything. At least, I know I do.
Pleonasm 36
You should have follow up with: "I meant: how about we both get off the bus now and I'll take you back to my place, for some hot, steamy...broccoli. And more." That always works for me.
Pleonasm 36
Oh totally; I just walk onto the bus and say "look at dat stache" and they don't caer if I won't let them sit beside me, they all up on this.
gc327072 31
Now I'm having memories of that Axe chocolate commercial, but with a chocolate mustache.
ShyAnn29 15
Ooh broccoli.....I bet that gets all the girls!!
little_one 20
Never write free moustache ride in sharpie on the wall it's hard to cover up...
Cbizzlez 10
Maybe next time ask her to repeat herself
superminty 18
I'm pretty sure that's just what he thought he heard at the time and only realized after that it was incorrect. It happens all the time to me.
dontpanic_fml 32
Why would he ask her to repeat herself if he thought he heard her correctly?
perdix 31
#5, he could use the old "Excuse me, I **** hear you, I have an ear infucktion. It's OK, I'm taking penis-cillin for it." That always works!
ohjoy15 33
@#17 I'm with #5 on this one. The FML says "Problem is, I didn't hear correctly and thought she asked if anyone was sitting next to me..." It's unclear as to whether OP realized he heard wrong before or after the girl asked if she could sit by him. The way this FML is worded, it sounds (to me) like OP didn't hear the girl's question properly, but assumed she was asking if anybody was sitting in the seat beside him. Sometimes under pressure, when the situation demands an immediate response, I tend to assume things too. It's like a reflex. You don't even need to hear the question to guess what it is in certain circumstances.
LiterOfCola 16
Maybe you heard her right and she just wanted to show you how angry sitting next to you would make her.
theamazingone_12 7
just be like im sorry i misunderstood you, you can sit next to me
TwistedShadow 7
"No, you're more than welcome to sit here..." Is the reply that would of worked with either question...
brittyboo123 35
It's not that hard to ask her to repeat herself. :)
tacojauns 45
Why didn't you yell to her "I'm sorry I thought you said is anyone sitting here"?