Today, while meeting some of the big boss guys at my new job, one of the men sneezed on his hand and then grabbed mine for a handshake. I felt every gooey bit of his snot between our hands. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, my boss sneezed onto his hands and then licked them in front of my best customers. FML
Memorable presentation
Today, I had a big meeting. Halfway through my presentation, I sneezed, and continued talking. I get some weird looks from my co-workers, but I didn't understand what they meant. When I finished, I passed by my boss walking to my chair, and he gave me a handkerchief. Why? Snot was all over my tie. FML
New face
Today, I went back to work after being sick for a week. While I was gone, they hired a new manager. Trying to score bonus points, and possibly a raise, I went to shake her hand and introduce myself. Just as I was about to say, "Hello, my name is…" I sneezed right in her face. FML
Flirtatious bubble
Today, at work, I was standing at the till helping an attractive man. I have a cold and could feel the snot bubbling up. He orders and we flirt for a bit. Just as I'm about to hand him his product, I sneeze quite loudly and forcefully all over his face. Guess I won't be getting that number. FML
Gross
Today, I saw my co-worker sneeze into his palm, get up, walk to my desk and smear his hand all over my computer mouse. He then went back to his desk and continued with his work. Last week we had a workplace awareness meeting about my OCD and fear of germs. FML
Today, it's my first day at my new job. Unfortunately, I have a very bad cold. When my boss leaned in to show me something on the computer, I sneezed all over him. A hell of a first impression. FML
Say it, don't spray it
Today, I heard my coworker sneeze on the other side of the break room, and right after I felt something wet hit my cheek. FML
Today, I was in a meeting and someone behind me sneezed really loudly. As they were doing so, I felt something cold land on my neck. FML
Today, I was walking into the building I hoped to work in someday with my resume, ready to be interviewed. As I walked through the doors I had to sneeze, so lifted my hands and sneezed a huge bloody booger right in the middle of the cover page. Turns out future employers don't like that. FML
Today, at church, I sneezed suddenly and messily into my hand just as the priest asked us to stand and greet our neighbors with a handshake. FML
Top comments
DiversityHD 16
That is not very hygienic. He should have nose this.
KayDee29 31
Just go ahead and chop that hand off, OP. Just to be safe.
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Comments (45)
logank013 20
Did you feel the need to reply 3 times with the same message? Lol
logank013 20
Did you feel the need to reply 3 times with the same message? Lol
logank013 20
Did you feel the need to reply the same thing 3 times? Lol.
logank013 20
Did you feel the need to reply 3 times with the same message? Lol
logank013 20
Did you feel the need to reply the same thing 3 times? Lol.
juliaf 15
Says the one who said the same thing five times
justsaiyan 6
And this is why people should sneeze into their arms.
Le_ponderer 14
You should chop off that arm because no amount of washing will get that icky sensation off.