Today, while lying in bed, my boyfriend reached over and pinched my love handles and said "Where did this muffin top come from?". Then he sang "Do you know the muffin man?" to me. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I asked my boyfriend if I could call him "love muffin". He asked if he could call me "muffin top". FML
Today, my boyfriend grabbed my love handles. It tickled, so I giggled and squirmed out of his grip. He looked at me quizzically and said, "I'm surprised you still have feeling there with all that fat." FML
The Conquest of Bread
Today, my boyfriend and I were playing around, tickling each other. He grabbed my stomach roll and told me it looked like a baguette. FML
Baby Got Back
Today, while in bed, my fiancé rolled over in the dark and complimented me on my nice buttocks. He had actually grabbed a roll of back fat. FML
Today, while in bed, my boyfriend pointed to my stomach and said, "Bad fat", then pointed to my boobs and said, "Good fat." FML
Today, my boyfriend was stroking my stomach and looking into my eyes. It was very romantic, until he grabbed my love handles and said, "Mmmm... bacon..." FML
Today, I was lying in bed with my boyfriend, he grabbed my double chin and goes "gobble, gobble". FML
Today, while my boyfriend and I were eating ice cream, he put his arm around me and began leaning in for what I thought was a kiss. Instead, he grabbed and began jiggling my stomach fat, along with making raspberry sounds. Once he was done, he did the same to my thighs. FML
Today, while cuddling with my boyfriend in the dark, he grabbed onto a fat roll and asked, "Is this your stomach or boob?" I didn't have the heart to tell him it was a back roll. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were lying in bed together, and I was in a snuggly mood. I rolled over to gaze lovingly into his eyes and whisper sweet nothings to him in the darkness. His response? "Dear God! Did somebody fart in your mouth?!" FML
Top comments
Idontgivedamn 0
He probably doesn't mean it to be mean, he's trying to be a funny in dumb/cute way.
gildedmuse 0
I am almost positive that saying things like, "I'd rather date a girl who was a little fatter" as if it's a negative is exactly the sort of thing that makes girls wonder, "Wait, am I fat?" constantly.
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Comments (164)
jc21_fml 1
the muffin man? THE MUFFIN MAN!!!!!!!
Bdub87 0
That is ******' awesome. Thanks, that's the best laugh i had all day. Damn now i got the damn song stuck in my head, I haven't even thought about it since i was like 9.
logieebearr 0
what's the big point?laughter is amazing,girls need to learn how to laugh at things and stop being so sensitive and self concious,if you don't like urr body then you should have the will power to change it. laugh at your little muffin top,in skinny and have a little arm fat the guy I like plays with it all the time it's halirious lol
samantha_durano 6
^^sounds kinda wierrd? but anyways lol I don't think it's a big deal, who cares and if your really upset about it, take a jog.
bigbluebronco 0
but the most important thing is... do u kno the muffin man? does he indeed live on drury lane? WE NEED ANSWERS!!!!
SettoFail 9
That's so funny. I wouldn't have even been mad I woulda laughed my ass off. That's seriously ******* hilarious. Hahahahaha get over it.
danielw 0
i concur. This man deserves a medal.
xcanisx 0
He does deserve a medal. If you are upset about it, don't go on the net and whine about it, get off your ass and change it!
Diannaa 0
Lmao
fruityrainbow86 0
LMFAO!! omg that's freakin hilarious! xD
anthraxcp 0
another fat chick complaining on fml cuz she ate 1... or 76 too many donuts?!? shocker!
allysgotstyle 0
How do you know she's overly overweight? she could be skinny and just have little love handles. Don't be a ******* troll, i bet you're fat yourself.
Yarixa 0
kick his ass!