Today, while in class, I was called down to the office. The principal showed me a video of two guys fighting in the school parking lot. I'm accused of being one of those guys. I'm a girl. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was suspended from school for “being involved in a fight.” The other girl beat me up while I didn't do anything to defend myself, for fear of getting in trouble. She got off scot free. FML
Today, I got detention at school because a girl told the principal I was stalking her on campus. I wasn't stalking her, we just have very similar schedules. FML
Today, I was escorted out of the building for getting in a scuffle at my anger management class. FML
Today, my principal made me visit "anti-violence" classes because I had a picture of me threatening a man with a gun on my Facebook page. It was taken during the school play, where I was acting as a gangster and the gun was just a toy. The principal saw the play. FML
Today, I was in school when a guy grabbed my breast, so I swore at him and shoved him away. I got detention and he walked away unpunished. FML
Today, as two of my students walked into my classroom, I said, "Hi, ladies". One of them screamed at me: "Did you just assume my gender?!" FML
Today, I was tricked into seeming like a sexist pig. A girl at the gym asked me to show her how to use a machine, so I did, then she started screaming at me to leave her alone. An hour later, I was all over the gym social media in a phone video heavily edited to make me look like a creepy gym bro. FML
Today, I had to suspend a student. Apparently, someone convinced him that he turned invisible. He walked into the girls locker room thinking he could not be seen. I work at a high school. FML
Today, I got my ass beat by some kid in my grade. The reason I was targeted? The superintendent, aka my idiot father, suspended him for defending himself in another fight. The kid told me it's not personal, he needed to prove a point that our school doesn't do shit about bullying, As much as I agree with him… FML
Today, my so-called friend snitched to the teachers that I was the admin of the school confessions page and I got scolded after school. FML
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Top comments
PleaseStayChill 9
Shave your head, grow out your 'stache, and embrace your masculinity.
teague95 16
tell him "nah ain't me, but ill whip both these *******"
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Comments (118)
daniel_dd31 13
Wow that must of been awkward to tell the principal.
domking1315 20
Yeah it was probably awkward for the principal...
WCARlover 35
OP just has some pipes, nothing to be ashamed of ;)
theHIGHroad2 5
Well Op, Man up and tell him You ARE in fact a girl, show him if you have.. But that would be awkward though.
Yousuck24 21
But 51, I don't think she wants to man up. I mean, she's already been mistaken for a guy.
Vimy 6
You never know. Maybe she had a sudden She's The Man Amanda Bynes moment and showed them the goods.
Vimy 6
Then my job is done, 103 :)
PleaseStayChill 9
Shave your head, grow out your 'stache, and embrace your masculinity.
U_GotitDude 18
Time to hit the gym
itsharkley 8
Skip to no-shave november
tj5810 21
No one said shit about her being fat...
cobi45 2
Maybe get a goatee for the full effect!
teague95 16
tell him "nah ain't me, but ill whip both these *******"
onlychildFTW 34
I don't think that's the best approach as fighting seems to be serious at OPs school.
domking1315 20
Pretty sure she'd get in trouble just for saying that to the principal...
Beeftinkle 13
Teague was clearly joking...
loserboii 11
He's likely just jealous of your manly scaping while he looks like a girl.
LiterOfCola 16
Scaping makes me think of runescape. Lol
ConBroChilll 9
60- Ha, GAYYY!
mduffy08 8
Whoa whoa whoa, if he wants to spend hours upon hours chopping down trees to get his skill to 99... Then lol you are gay!
ninjacow123 6
Well the principal is homosexual
iiTzNeeNerz 26
Loserboii- you're slowly becoming my favorite commenter. LoL
yogima 6
Ouch... Sorry. Maybe now's the time to wear lots of pink?
CheeseTron 15
Then they'll just think he's gay.
JerryH 9
She*
1awliet 8
Because only girls wear pink.
gree_fml 11
Then people would just think "he" likes to wear pink. At least others would be less surprised if they see "him" dating a guy
accioshannon 17
Because all men that wear pink are gay, right? Well, time to label every NFL player down as queer.
onlychildFTW 34
Boys wear pink to! But she could wear frilly stuff. Most guys don't wear that.
twinkiefeets 17
Your a handsome woman.
rs89 20
Although I appreciate your kind words, I feel obliged to correct you. It's "you're" not "your". Also, it's "feet" the plural of foot not "feets". Now, I feel better.
Marrach 7
I'm pretty sure they know this.. Its the virtual world, not college essays, no one gives a shit about grammar... If you can atleast read it, quit correcting. I just felt the authority of pointing that out.
Welshite 40
#16: I don't care about the your, you're correction. However Twinkiefeets is his name. Based on your logic, we should start calling you Rocket Ship, Road Sweeper, or Room Service.
unknown_user5566 27
19- How does one "feel the authority", exactly?
Welshite 40
"YOU WILL RESPECT MY AUTHORITAH!!!" Like that Kylee.
Pleonasm 36
By fondling a police officer.
In_some_bullshit 13
#26 WON!
unknown_user5566 27
Pleonasm, your answer sounds like something someone would do on the show "Cops". I can picture the suspect interview now: "Yeah man, I just wanted to know what authority felt like... so I grabbed his ass! Damn it feels good to be in charge!"
Pleonasm 36
"Hey that's no service pistol, that's my long arm of the law you're copping a feel at! Don't make me get out my night-stick and force you into submission."
farkie3 8
26 - *** DA PO-LEES! Gently.
twinkiefeets 17
16--Twinkiefeets is a nickname my grandfather gave me but I'll change that just for you. Get a life-fml is about fun, not English class.
yessy729 0
I hope you have a boy cut.. Or else this would be extremely awkward
BossPathfinderGM 14
I'm sorry for the gender confusion. I hate drive thrus for the same reason.
gczizza1997 15
Sorry op that sucks, I hope you called the principle out on his mistake and watched his expression turn to complete embarrassment
loserman67 36
And you wondered why the principal said one of you fought like a girl. I hope he thought you were the winner at least.