Today, while I was babysitting my nephews, the 7 year old boy walked up to me and asked if I was a lesbian. I laughed it off. An argument ensued about my sexuality for a good two hours. I lost. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I babysat the brattiest and most foul-mouthed 8-year-old I've ever met. After I survived three hours of it, his parents finally came home. He claimed I'd invited a boy over and that we did "stuff" on the couch all evening. They believed him. I didn't get paid, to say the least. FML
Today, while babysitting, the little boy explained to me why I was single, reasons such as 'unattractive' and 'not the girlfriend type'. I cried. FML
Today, the 8 year old that I babysit every week told me that it was sad that I didn't have a boyfriend while he has a girlfriend. I got burned by a 3rd grader. FML
Today, I babysat a 6-year-old boy for the first time. When I said it was his bedtime, he just screamed "Eat a dick!" at me. I was so shocked, all I could do was leave him be. When his parents returned, I had to make up an excuse for why he was still awake and watching TV, to save my pride. FML
Today, I babysat an 11 year old kid while his parents ate out. As soon as they left, the kid asked me if I wanted to be on the sex offender's list. Before I could even process that, he told me to stay out of his way and he wouldn't accuse me of anything. FML
Today, the 7 year old boy I was babysitting studied my upper lip and said "It's okay, my daddy won't let me shave yet either." I'm a girl. FML
Today, I babysat a 10 year old from hell. She kept insulting me, saying I have tiny boobs, that boys must hate me, and that I'm ugly. I eventually got fed up and put her to bed. When her parents came back, she ran out of her room in tears and told them I'd beaten her. They believed it. FML
Today, I went to my 7 year old son's school for a conference with his teacher. When I got there, the teacher said "she adored me for who and what I am". I was puzzled. Turns out my son told his class that I am a "lesbian American." Wrong. I'm Lebanese-American. FML
Today, my mom tried to convince my dad that I was a lesbian. Why? Because she was bored. FML
Today, a guy kept flirting with me despite all my hints for him to kindly fuck off and die, so I lied and said I'm a lesbian. This didn't stop him. It got so bad, I had to claim I was born with a dick and say that's why I like girls. Only then did he say "Eeewww..." and back off. FML
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Top comments
genericnickname 0
You can't have a proper arguement with a child. They don't listen to logic or reason. They'll scream "Autie's a lezzie! Auntie's a lezzie!" until you're beaten into submission.
Amphysvena 11
So, by saying you lost, you mean a 7-year-old actually convinced you that you're gay?
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Comments (41)
genericnickname 0
You can't have a proper arguement with a child. They don't listen to logic or reason. They'll scream "Autie's a lezzie! Auntie's a lezzie!" until you're beaten into submission.
mangoboy1 19
Same goes for religious people when arguing about religion
Jester epic_151 11
Auntie? Its a male going by the icon
sexy1 0
lesbian.
wanderingidiot 0
so are you?
Commentator_fml 0
You know you fail at life, if you lose in a fight over your sexuality to a Seven year old.
greendaygirl999 5
You fail for capitalizing seven.
drdingus 27
*High five*
lifepwns 0
I just would have told the kid he was gay. LOL
mechanicalrain 0
hate to admit it, but i'm with #9 "aunti, you're a lesbian!" "you're right, wanna know what i did to your mom last night?" ts what i would have done *shrug*
nmlutgen 11
Your an idiot, the kids mom is the babysitters sister or sister-in-law. Nice try though.
winfieldALJD 6
You're an idiot for using "your" instead of "you're."
liljon3 0
wow, why would oyu talk to the kid about that. you should just tell him to not use that word.
dantheman931 0
Which of you is the adult, exactly? If one of my nieces tried that, I'd tell them it's none of their business and leave it there. If they tried to press it, they'd go to bed with no dessert or something.
giffinator 0
Yeah, none of his buisness... he prolly just liked using the word lesbian.
Amphysvena 11
So, by saying you lost, you mean a 7-year-old actually convinced you that you're gay?