Today, while having sex with my girlfriend on the bathroom floor, I felt something tickle my balls. I looked back to see her sister's kitten getting in on the action. I think I just had my first threesome. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I had my first threesome. It was me, my wonderful girlfriend, and her shithead cat after he decided my balls were a bag of catnip and just had to play with. Things ended pretty fast. FML
Today, I was making out with my girlfriend in my room. About two minutes into it, my cat walks in and jumps on the bed with us. Without hesitation, my girlfriend tells me to stop, rolls over, and starts petting my cat. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend in the missionary position. Once again, our cat decided to crawl onto his back and stare at me. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex for the first time when my 4 year old sister walked in. She thought we were making a dog pile, so just as soon as my boyfriend was about to finish, she jumped on his back. FML
Today, I visited my girlfriend at her place, one thing lead to another, and we had sex for the first time. Her normally very sweet cat now hisses and savages me if I so much as look at him. FML
Today, I had some unexpected alone time for the first time in months and decided to *ahem* play with an adult toy. As things were getting close to the end, my cat jumped up on the bed, saw the movement under the blanket and immediately pounced on my downstairs, puncturing certain delicate areas with his claws. FML
Today, in the very middle of the night, my kitten started rubbing against my face. Thinking I saw her face in the darkness, I decided to kiss her before going back to bed. My lips made contact with her butthole. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I slept naked after a great night together. I awoke to a sharp pain in my penis and found our cat trying a new scratching post. FML
Today, it's been three years since my sister gave me a kitten. Coincidentally, it’s also been three years since I've had sex. FML
Today, as I was feeling frisky, I started to jack off. I was about to come when my cat attacked my hand and nether regions under the blanket. I really got the pussy, didn’t I? FML
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Top comments
deathbatchickk 8
Nothing wrong with two *******
JustAGirlOnFML 11
Soft kitty Warm kitty Little ball of fur Happy kitty Sleepy kitty Won't you feel my balls
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Comments (62)
Ziggy46 2
You better hope It's declawed.... cats tend to play with things that dangle
dannnngthatsux 19
Yeah, hope you had it's fingers removed, oh wait, declawing does!
theycallmekitty 13
And I thought it was weird that my boyfriend's cat liked to watch...
dannnngthatsux 19
It was just confused, 'why don't you bite her? That's the only way girls* get off...! Do it, bite her!' *Female felines.
SuperDanielNL 23
Ted Nugent - Cat Scratch Fever. Wonderfull song
LilLube 2
Bathroom floor, classy..
MissRoxiie 12
Well now you can check "threesome" off your bucket list!
grtfuldeadlovr 27
Why are you having sex on a bathroom floor how unsanitary.
SuperDanielNL 23
The bathroom seems the most sanitary , tiles are easy to clean.
grtfuldeadlovr 27
If they actually clean the tiles I can't remember the last time I cleaned my bathroom floor although I don't have sex on it if I did maybe I'd be more apt to clean it
charvisioku 22
48: Eww... you never clean your bathroom floor? Dirty goblin.
SuperDanielNL 23
Then I would nit have sex on your bathroom floor. Besides a tile floor doesn't seem very comfy.
False_Stupidity 42
A tiled floor would be rather cold for sex, I imagine they would be doing it on a towel or something rather than directly on the floor.
grtfuldeadlovr 27
They make heated tile floors they are actually quite nice
AllieCat21 21
48 just because you don't clean your bathroom floor doesn't mean others don't.
BlackPhenom 9
Try shagging in the shower next time. You'll be kitten free and it's more sanitary, win win
Enslaved 38
Gotta trim those ball hairs if they resemble a ball of yarn.
EffySmith 5
y were you having sex on the bathroom floor with the door open, your just asking to be humped by that kitten
Motorcycleguy24 6
Probably cause when things get "hot" and your home alone with your girl, the last thing you are worried about is a cat jumpin in
micah9794 4
So i guess you got the cats tongue for once LmaoFF