Today, while going through airport security the lady asked why I folded everything so small. I said that I was going away for a month and needed to fit a lot of stuff in only one bag. She smiled, nodded and then dumped my luggage to search for "drugs and other illegal teen things." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was boarding my flight when I got pulled aside for looking suspicious. As she was opening my bag, I said, "Be careful, I jammed so many clothes in there it may explode." I was then strip searched for my trouble. FML
Today, after visiting my mom, she stuffed a bunch of pads in my backpack so I'd have some at my dorm. When I was going through security, I was stopped and ended up missing my flight. Apparently the jumbo pads my mom sent look exactly like packs of cocaine when they go through the X-ray machine. FML
Today, I borrowed a friend's suitcase for a trip. At the airport, security pulled me aside because there was a small metal object inside. I opened the suitcase expecting something suspicious and found a potato peeler. My friend had used the suitcase for groceries the week before. FML
Today, while going through customs at the airport, my bag was selected for screening. It was nearly overflowing because it was so full, so before the TSA agent searched it, I said, "Watch out - it's going to explode when you open it". Wrong choice of words. FML
Today, as I was crossing to the US, I got pulled over by border patrol for looking "suspicious". The female cop searched my purse and found a condom. She smirked and said, "I doubt you'd ever need that." FML
Today, I was traveling. At airport security, the woman patting me down felt something "down there" and asked me what I was wearing. I told her it was a sanitary napkin. She put her hands inside my pants just to be sure. FML
Today, I missed my flight because I was stopped by airport security. They found "small, suspicious, spherical objects" in my purse on the X-ray. After pulling me out of line, taking my purse aside and carefully opening it with tongs, they removed the bag of grapes I had packed as a snack. FML
Today, at the Eurostar customs, an officer asked me if I had packed my luggage myself. I teasingly answered "No, I was helped by a member of Al Qaeda." which earned me a body and luggage search and a missed train. FML
Today, I was standing at airport security. One of the bag inspectors asked me to remove my travel pouch, pointing to the lump under my shirt. I didn't know how to tell him that it was just one of my fat rolls. FML
Today, I was going through airport security. Trying to get things over and done with quickly, I dropped my pants without a second thought. Turns out they just wanted me to remove my shoes and belt. FML
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Top comments
midget_chinese 0
bah, the profiling system gets on my nerves :P
CassT 0
If it was a man, you could've said, "Because I needed to make room for my tampons."
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Comments (186)
Stevieebabyy 0
Freaking hate that. I bought my whole family Burger King before the 6 hour trip from Mexico to Boston to find out that the US won't allow drinks on the plane because of poisonous water.
sairara 0
Didn't you hear? It's now mandatory for all 'teens' to carry marijuana, crack and ecstasy on their person at all times.
zed_eh 0
name 5...
CaptainPat 0
Not really an FMl the lady was just doing her job.
Hugorgy 0
That sucks. My teacher (a Caucasian red-head) always gets stopped by airport security when she travels. Why, you ask? Because her husband, though he is a mix of German and African, looks Middle Eastern or Jewish. Of course they don't stop him in search of supplies to hi-jack the plane, but look at the innocent white woman who could be the mule in the operation. It happens EVERY TIME they travel. She expects it now. Sadly, profiling based on ethnicity or age in airports is acceptable to make everyone "safe". Bullshit.
Veldan 1
Sorry to hear that OP. Being a 6'4" 110Kg muscular man, i get pulled aside EVERY time apparently being big and tall means you're up to no good by default. They always like to take everyhting out of your bag and either they will just leave it all over the floor or they'll try to really haphazardly cram it all back in usually breaking something. Even in Aus they got a little crazy about security after 9/11.
FoundManyLemons 0
Whatta ****.
klassi1 0
Wow...there are sooo many stupid, ignorant, down right idiotic people posting comments on something they do not understand. For those of you who would like to learn a little bit about our country and how things work in the airlines, listen to the TSA person. They were right on. Yes, selection is supposed to be random. Yes, sometimes, when TSA thinks it is in the BEST INTEREST OF EVERYONE, they will pull someone extra over. Big whoop. Countless times random searches have saved multiple lives. I myself worked at an airport, loading the baggage-I was damn glad that TSA was there one step ahead of me making sure that the luggage that I was handling was safe. I have flown countless times, and have not personally been stripped searched, but I have had my luggage searched, had to remove multiple items from my body, and you know what? As much of an irritant as it is, I WAS HAPPY TO DO IT! You want to know why? Because my father flies for a living, and I like to know that there are people doing their DAMNEDEST to make sure he is safe. Sad thing, I do not believe that enough people are searched, because I have forgotten pocket knives in my carry on luggage before, and they were not caught by security. X-Ray machines are crap. So for you ignorant assholes (excuse my french), grow up, and accept it, because it is protecting us. And no, the 4th amendment DOES NOT apply here-do some freaking research because you look like an idiot stating things like that. Oh, and to the person who thought that making $65 an hour was made up because it was more than what the president makes??? My father makes over $200 an hour. His first job was working for Motorola, where he made over $100 an hour. He has since moved on to a bigger company. He worked his ass off to get to where he is today, nothing was ever given to him, so please do not make ignorant remarks, ok? And I probably shouldn't say this, since certain people will probably consider me racist or a profiler, but whatever...I'll bet those of you who had a problem with what this TSA person did probably voted for Obama...? To the OP-grow up-I'd like to see you do that job.
Shyman4ever 0
So did she find any?
Sokai_fml 0
Airport security FTL. It was my least favorite part of my vacation. D: