Today, while cashiering at the drug store, I saw my ex-boyfriend, who I'm still completely in love with. Being the only cashier, I had to ring him up. He was buying condoms. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was the only cash register open at the local supermarket. I had to sell condoms and chocolate frosting to my ex. FML
Today, I was in the 'intimacy' section of Walmart. After grabbing 2 boxes of condoms and a vibrating ring I turn around to see my ex boyfriend's mom. I smile awkwardly and put my head down as I walk away, causing me to colide with his dad and send my 'goodies' all over the floor. FML
Today, my ex-husband’s new girlfriend stopped by the pharmacy I work at, checked out at my lane, and had me ring up her condoms. She kept bragging about how she’s gonna have “nasty freaky sex” with my ex all night long while I work at a “miserable pharmacy.” I burst into tears while she laughed and waltzed away. FML
Today, I was buying condoms for my girlfriend and myself. While at the checkout counter, my guy friend sees me, runs to me, puts his arm around me, kisses me on the cheek, then yells "Thank you baby!" There were about twenty people behind me, they all gave me dirty looks. FML
Today, I was at the store, when I saw my boyfriend in line in front of me. I looked to see what he was purchasing; it was a pack of condoms. When I questioned him, he said that, "They're for us, babe!" We already have an unopened pack at home, and it's my time of the month. FML
Today, I saw my crush working the only open till at the grocery store. When she saw me approach her queue, she immediately called for more cashiers. FML
Today, I went grocery shopping at the store near my house. Upon checking out, I look up to see that my cashier is none other than the woman I went on a date with a few months ago, and whose calls and texts I ignored after she began to obsess over me. FML
Today, at my job as a cashier, a very old man came through my checkout. His purchase consisted of a box of condoms and a can of whipped cream. The creepy smile he gave me has scarred me for life. FML
Today, I went out shopping. When I left the store, I saw my ex, who I'm still crazy about. He helped me carry my bags out to the car. When I leaned in to give him a hug goodbye, he stepped aside, and I fell face-first into a puddle. He walked away laughing. FML
Today, I met my ex's new boyfriend. I was at work, cashiering at the movie theater that they were apparently having their first date at. We broke up less than 24 hours ago. FML
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Top comments
Javee 17
Hey, don't jump to conclusions. Condoms make awesome balloons.
smilepatrol 7
He might have done it to make you jealous? You should've said 'oh, you got these a size too big, the extra smalls are on the right'
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Comments (146)
StrangeDuckling 9
I would say, "Uhh, this is WAY to big for you!!" Lol if you know what I mean! That is, if you went ***** mode and slept with him... If not, more power to you!!!
Abbyybba 0
I didn't know sleeping with ones boyfriend automatically puts them into "***** mode". interesting.
xcheshirecat 11
***** mode ? You mean having fun ?
StrangeDuckling 9
Ok, you sleep with a boyfriend. You breakup and realize, "Damn! Why did I sleep with HIM?!" Gets another boyfriend, sleeps with him. Says the same thing. Gets another boyfriend..... And if you ARE going to get married, then WHY NOT WAIT?!?!! DUH!!
MarisaCB 16
20: Why not wait? Hmm. Well, let's see. First of all, having sex with your BOYFRIEND is not ***** mode. If you believe you're ready for sex, you should be able to have it as long as you go through all the precautions. I'm one of those people that see sex as a beautiful, natural thing. And you may decide after having sex with someone that they ARE the one you want to marry. I respect your choice of no sex before marriage, but don't call op or anyone else a ***** for not agreeing with you.
Abbyybba 0
Strangeduckling Come back in ten years and read what you wrote. I bet u will laugh.
StrangeDuckling 9
I am laughing, just not at the one I wrote!! Lol Sex IS a beautiful thing, but it should be with the one you love. And if you love EACH OTHER, then you are most likely to get married (unless someone is kidnapped for years... Or dies) and then, hmmmm, you can have sex AFTER you're married!! Because if you get married, then you usually think that you are ready. So what was said goes back to what I'm saying!! And I didn't call OP a *****, I said IF she went *****-MODE!! Lol XD
bfsd42 20
Really Strangeduckling? How small is that box in which you are living?
StrangeDuckling 9
It's actually a pretty big box, thank you How's your Magic One Fingered Glove working out for ya? Lol
StrangeDuckling 9
Jk XP
MissAmz 7
Strange, it's called Divorce. If everyone waited to have sex, there would be a ****-ton more of them.
StrangeDuckling 9
No, not really That has nothing to do with it So therefore your argument is invalid
isaiaah 6
Most people have sex to see if they even LIKE there boyfriend/girlfriend. If everyone waited till marriage to have sex there would be a lot of divorces. So to say, YOUR argument is invalid. Sex isn't a crime, people do it because they want to and you have no right to tell them otherwise. And calling someone a ***** and saying they're going into ***** mode is no way to do it you ass. When some people want to get their point across theyre a little nicer about it, maybe then people will listen.
StrangeDuckling 9
Lol your argument is invalid... You called me an ass and told me to be nice... OK!
beckyxD 13
Sex after marriage, eh? Let me ask you this StrangeDuckling, would you ever buy a car without taking it for a test drive?
StrangeDuckling 9
Sorry if I sounded rude guys! That's my opinion! I don't believe in premarital sex for several reasons... 1.People, usually girls, end up regretting having had sex/losing their virginity to HIM! "OMG! I can't believe I SLEPT with him!! Ewww!! He us SUCH a jerk!!" or "He is SO disgusting!!" If you talk to many girls (not all, mind you) many of them say that they wish they never did it so that they can be "new and clean" for the one they will eventually marry. 2. Condoms don't always prevent pregnancy 3. (Usually at school) A girl having sex usually fuels gossip for a long time, so she is usually called a "****". Esp. If she got pregnant. (Not all) guys usually dump a girl after sex, or at least tell all their friends, in turn making him a "stud" and "adding notches to his belt" and causing gossip, making the girl look bad. 4. Condoms don't always prevent STDs... You may say " If they get married and get an STD anyway, who cares?" Well, if both partners waited to have sex until they got married, then they would both (most likely, like 98%) be clean, therefore causing no STD increases. If everyone waited to have sex, then how could the STD rate be so high, esp. among teens and adolescents. This is also for guys, btw So sorry if I sounded "ass-ish"
speckledots 29
I would love to know what (if any) conversation dialogue went on here.
noisebox 1
You should have treated him like a stranger, but look at the bright side you don't have to let come in the back door anymore...
summertimexo 3
Akward!!!
poppysoda 4
Should've poked holes in them while he wasn't looking and suggested buying a pregnancy test just in case.
isaiaah 6
Yes, that is the logical thing she should've done. Isn't it?
TheDrifter 24
While you're getting over him, he's getting on top of her.
KiddNYC1O 22
We have a wiener here.
fatalwish 6
to use with his future ex girlfriend :D
xXxIracebethxXx 14
Great. A guy who wants to be branded as an asshole. Nice goal you have there.
newbiehere99 6
At least you know he is being safe ..
ForeverAloneGal 23
He's just smuggling drugs, don't even worry about it.
fylx100 19
38- And what do you know about relationships?
ForeverAloneGal 23
My comment had nothing to do with relationships. I was implying that he was buying condoms to put drugs in and then insert into his anus.
fylx100 19
You didn't get it. "Forever Alone Girl" haha therefore, you wouldn't know anything about relationships. Sheesh lol
arduousRainbow 1
Sell him the Magic 1 Fingered Glove instead.