Today, I was at the store, when I saw my boyfriend in line in front of me. I looked to see what he was purchasing; it was a pack of condoms. When I questioned him, he said that, "They're for us, babe!" We already have an unopened pack at home, and it's my time of the month. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, while my boyfriend was packing for his annual hunting trip, I saw him slip a box of condoms into his bag. FML
Shy boy
Today, a friend asked me if I'd buy him some condoms because he's too shy to buy them himself. I obliged and whilst queuing at the till to buy them I felt someone tap my shoulder. I turned around to see my fiancée glaring at me. We don't use condoms. FML
Today, I surprised my boyfriend with a bag containing condoms and sexy lingerie. He looks into it and says, "I hope you kept the receipt." FML
Today, I went to the store to pick up some feminine products. As I was paying, the male cashier looked at me sympathetically and asked if it was my girlfriend's time of the month. I'm a girl and was buying them for myself. FML
Faithful
Today, I went to my boyfriend's house, with whom I've been with for four years. I've been in Australia for the last two months and before I left, he bought a box of 12 condoms, saying we would use them when I got back. We went to the bedroom and I opened the box. There was one left. FML
Running commentary
Today, I nervously went to the store to buy condoms for the first time. I felt like everything was going well, and checked out happily. As I was walking out, the cashier lady said to the woman next in line, "He thinks he's going to need condoms." They both looked at me and started laughing. FML
Please do it
Today, it was my last day with my boyfriend before he went to college. At the store, he got a huge box of condoms. When I asked why he was getting so many, he said they were for the girls he meets at college. He then asked me to steal them for him. FML
Bye bye loser
Today, it was my last day with my boyfriend before he went to college. At the store, he got a huge box of condoms. When I asked why he was getting so many, he said they were for the girls he meets at college. He then asked me to steal them for him. FML
Today, I was buying condoms for my girlfriend and myself. While at the checkout counter, my guy friend sees me, runs to me, puts his arm around me, kisses me on the cheek, then yells "Thank you baby!" There were about twenty people behind me, they all gave me dirty looks. FML
PMS
Today, my boyfriend and I took a late night drive, and after a while he stopped at a gas station and asked if I wanted anything. I replied, "Guess." He came out and gave me a box of tampons. Apparently, I've been bitchy. FML
Top comments
rg350dx 29
Maybe he's planning on doubling up to, "part the red sea."
ChakatBlackstar 29
Well he could have forgotten both those facts. I end up picking up stuff I thought I was out of all the time.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (136)
rg350dx 29
Maybe he's planning on doubling up to, "part the red sea."
soccerstar1996 18
I bet that made you menstrually frustrated OP
simplysarcastics 26
Lol i love her username.
roro_superloser 13
He wants to re paint her wallpaper.. Sexy time :P
kurodansei 16
You are an evil genius. When I posred my comment you were Number 1 with just Letter M as your comment. I say how the edit function can be leveraged now. Unfortunately I cannot edit from my phone app =(
miketopgunmike1 25
yes you can, tap the little red circle thingy that's there for 45 seconds or so...
Thebroskii 11
A wise man once said: "When the river runs red, take the dirt road"
kurodansei 16
Were they ribbed for your pleasure? Lubricated? maybe it's not a quantity but a quality/variety issue. Optimism!
ChakatBlackstar 29
Well he could have forgotten both those facts. I end up picking up stuff I thought I was out of all the time.
AKGirlinSD 20
We all do that. Maybe the boyfriend is so anxious because his girlfriend's near the end of her period.
ageier7 10
before my wife had an IUD we used to have sex with her on her period every month. just put down a towel.
michelleJ11 25
Maybe you should've kept that to yourself. Too much information for comfort.
Sir_drink_alot 20
Why is this being thumbed down? I do it too, we bought a red towel just for that purpose. The only thing period blood ever hurt was white sheets
BaraSkit07 12
Well, the sheets, and the man's penis. But better blood than shit, if you know what I mean.
graceinsheepwear 34
A lot of women are especially responsive during their periods. It's just another body fluid. And hats off (and more) to men who go down and earn their red wings. Now THAT'S a man!
salazara 10
like, whoever has sex during periods, needs psychological help!
that_band_nerd 22
#43 I thumbed you down because of being close minded cause some people like that type of thing and because you like put "like" before you like commented.
CallMeMcFeelii 14
Going down there isn't too bad as long as it isn't a heavy flow. One of my ex's had some fetish about me doing that. My rule always was never on the first or last day. The shower is the best place to do it in my opinion. Easy clean up haha.
beautifulsoul89 11
To #43:: Really??! Mija you probably hvnt evn started your period..so you dont know wat u talking about
1PersonIsMyWorld 22
43-- ya u sound ignorant. also periods are known to make girls more "in the mood". ... I know they do for me. and my hubby doesnt mind...the towel idea is brilliant!
salazara 10
56 - Hey hun, stop telling me your life story
Mauskau 36
There is nothing wrong with it. In my experience it is a lot more pleasurable for the woman. Don't be so close minded.
Wizardo 34
To everyone bitching about periods and having sex, without the two happening at the same time you wouldn't have even been conceived...
graceinsheepwear 34
74, you don't get pregnant during your period. The period is happening precisely because pregnancy didn't happen and the lining of blood that built up to host the fertilized egg is being shed.
Wizardo 34
#75, Well it depends on what you classify as a period, normally women refer to it when the body ejects the menses but I was trying to refer to it as a whole menstrual cycle, I just got mixed up there. But in any case I see nothing wrong in the act anyway to be frank.
Smoldering 15
#56 she's 23 so biology says yes she has... And #43 every one likes different things.....
Phooey 22
I don't see the big deal on not having sex while on your period.... It's extra lube!
Rawr6591 21
or go in the shower
azwethinkweiz87 11
I find I'm in a more frisky mood during my period which is very frustrating lol. I had an ex who had no problem with it but it's not for everyone! Nothing disgusting about it though. The amount of bodily fluids that go around, it's just one more hehe :P
AKGirlinSD 20
19 and 43, you both are on the wrong site if you thinking conversing about period sex is too much. Toughen up a bit and enjoy the openness. You might even learn a thing or two, such as shower period sex.
MerrikBarbarian 9
26- black towels are better than red. Red can still stain. Period sex is out for me because I get horrible pain as a result now, but when my endo wasn't as bad I tried it. Black sheets in general are good for hiding blood stains... Which I realize sounds creepy as hell out of context... Especially with my icon. Lol oh well. There is my two cents on it :p
Calumae 8
You can technically still get pregnant while you're on your period, even though it less common than other times of the month. Sperm can live for two to five days, and different women ovulate at slightly different times in their cycle. For example, if a girl ovulated earlier, at day 10 of her cycle, and she has sex on day 5 of her cycle (during menstruation), she could become pregnant.
Calumae 8
It is*
dannondarko 12
I don't mind ketchup on my hot dog as long as the bun is tight.
Cristian89 29
He's just stocking up for the winter time lol
Uramonkey 11
The more the merrier!
roro_superloser 13
Weather predictions: Heavy snow ;-)
Uramonkey 11
46 - I sure hope OP's tires can handle it ;)
roro_superloser 13
#49 could be some sharp drifting ;-)
illegalbeagle69 23
Expect a few more inches?
threer 30
C-c-c-combo breaker!
Macscotty 9
Uh oh. That's troubling. Not assuming he's cheating. But maybe a talk is in order.
MissMae93 23
Easy way to find out if your man is cheating: poke wee little holes in the condom wrapper (NOT THE CONDOM) and proceed to soak in a variety of condiments (preferably hot sauce or jalapeño juice). If he has a fire down there for no apparent reason - there's your answer. HOWEVER - he may not be cheating, so make sure you know which condoms have been "pre-soaked" ;)
MerrikBarbarian 9
That sounds like a recipe for disaster... Usually you are grabbing for a condom in the heat of the moment and aren't really looking at it. Also it's hard to be sure you don't poke micro holes in. The condom itself.
vintaqe 28
#103 That sounds fine and dandy until he ends up using the condom on you and then your ****** turns into a volcano. There's nothing sexy about a volcanic ****** .. unless its erupting, if you know what I mean. ;)
NoMore_CoolNames 14
Is there anything wrong with wanting extra?
graceinsheepwear 34
Depends if you mean extra condoms or extra women...
AKGirlinSD 20
No, 7, there is no such thing as having too many condoms. I just really hope he only plans on using them on his girlfriend, the Original Poster.
gc327072 31
He's stocking those things for the a-****-alypse.
rg350dx 29
I'm just letting you know, if I ever make a porno, I will be using that word in the title.
gc327072 31
©2013 Catchy Titles Inc. *boom* royalties
AKGirlinSD 20
It is rather quite a catchy name ;).
flashback.miss 28
Yeah, hopefully he isn't cheating on you but, evidence points to that, but hopefully you find out the truth. That, or he's stocking up.
michelleJ11 25
There isn't any evidence pointing to cheating, that's just everyone's first guess. Everyone always jumps to the conclusion that the OP's being cheated on.
flashback.miss 28
well then, hopefully OP comes along and clears things up. "Hope for the best, but prepare for the worst."
Headcrab 29
A true man swims in the red sea.
graceinsheepwear 34
Great way of putting it!
salazara 10
Only a sick man swims in the red sea
graceinsheepwear 34
44, I think you might have missed and stuck that last tampon up your ass. What is the difference if there is blood? Sex is already a mess of semen and vaginal secretions. And the couple in the fml use condoms anyway. What's the problem? Everyone has opinions but you shouldn't be calling people sick who are less hung up than you.
AngrySailor 17
44-like, are you 14? STFU
salazara 10
Looks like I hit a nerve......ouch! it's not my fault I offended you - I was sharing my opinion just like everyone else! RUDE!!!!!!!!
salazara 10
Me 14? I'm not the one throwing a tantrum over a comment!!!! Grow up!
Uramonkey 11
58 - Actually it seems like you are the only one throwing a tantrum over a comment.
RedPillSucks 33
If you use your opinion to call other people sick because they do something you don't, then you deserve then thumbing and flaming. You basically started it with your rude assumption. I myself probably wouldn't have sex with someone on their period, but I'm not going to label people who do.
salazara 10
63 - well I did just that........so let it be!
therealafroninga 10
71, are you being visited by your aunt flow? Sex may relieve some stress...
AKGirlinSD 20
^She's sounding like she need a bit of relief. But she hates period sex so I doubt she will get herself off. All of us fellow FML commenters and readers must deal with her wrath.