Today, while at work, I managed to scrape open the inside of my nose with my fingernail, drawing blood in the process. I had to quickly up an explanation for my scream that didn't go: "Well, I was scouting for boogers..." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I reached to pick out a booger stuck in my nose that had been irritating me, and ended up poking myself in the eye. FML
Today, I was picking my nose so aggressively that I flicked a booger right into my eye. FML
Today, I had a nosebleed at work after having recent surgery. As I was walking to the bathroom, I tripped and fell, sending blood splattering everywhere. My manager, who was walking by, looked at me and said, “You’re really committed to the bit.” I was too embarrassed to respond. FML
Today, I had the longest, bloodiest, bloody nose ever when I was at work. I got blood on a few materials as I was running to the restroom. I work in a food factory, so everything had to be sanitized and thrown out. Now management wants me to pay for everything we had to throw out. FML
Today, I got so bored that I drew a face on my index finger, and made a video of me garrotting it with a string. I ended up rupturing a blood vessel, and had to think up a cover story for my girlfriend to explain my screaming. FML
Today, I got a painful scratch on my nose. Nasty kitty? Nope. I never imagined a dried booger stuck in my handkerchief could be this hard and this sharp. FML
Today, I cut my finger at work while chopping some vegetables. I grabbed the nearest rag I could to stop the bleeding and put it on the cut. I didn't know the rag had just been used to clean up a lemon juice spill. FML
Today, while observing a surgery, I was asked to open a glass ampule of adrenaline. Not only did I break it and get it everywhere, I sliced open my thumb bad enough to need stitches. FML
Today, I was with a wedding party getting manicures. I absentmindedly used a freshly-painted nail to pick my nose and ended up with two beauticians scraping indestructible bright red gel varnish out of my left nostril with acetone soaked q-tips, while everyone sat waiting in complete silence. FML
Today, I dropped some glass at my job while putting it on the shelf. A shard bounced off the floor and went up my nose. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
zoPwNAgEzo 21
Jeez, how deep were you scouting?
alexup24 13
You must trim your fingernails brethren.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (90)
MLIPFA 0
Sometimes boogers won't blow out of the tissue, so you have to send your finger in to finish the job.
thetoxiclion 4
Don't feel bad about the fags telling you how sick that is, we all do it..
iCake 13
Pickung nose huh
gingerfly91 1
Sometimes, I put verbs in my sentences. In other news, I feel your pain, OP, my fingernails are sharp and deadly so when I get the urge, I have to search for tissue.
KuchkaNumberOne 2
That's why you don't pick your nose. Are you three years old? Damn. Get a tissue.
thetoxiclion 4
Don't feel bad about the idiots telling you how sick that is, We all do it...
Taurus_ChicKa 37
YDI for having long nails AND using them to pick your nose. I can't stand long nails, underneath fingers is the dirtiest/germiest place on the human body. *shudders* Plus I can't type my 100 wpm with long nails. I have to have them cut. I don't want to risk them breaking either. But yeah, seriously, your nails must not just be long but extremely sharp if they pulled off skin inside your nose. Talons!!! Cut them!!!
DrBlack 9
Yeah, long nails are ridiculous and ugly. Don't understand why some women thinks it makes them attractive but then I'd say the same for those stupid drawn on eyebrows and fake lashes too. People are such victims.
fishereric 1
You deserve it for picking your nose.
Phr0zen 11
That happened to me a bunch of times and I am a guy so it is pretty normal as long as you don't do it when people are sitting beside you since it is something you don't do in public like farting everywhere.
jonnyman 0
Wow... YDI…