Today, we got our family pictures back from the printers. I complained to my mom about the ones she picked. "Oh don't worry," she said. "I had them photoshop out your gut." I was talking about my smile. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my sister got her retouched wedding photos. Apparently one of the things she had the professional do was edit me out of them. FML
Today, my dad found the ugliest picture my mom has ever taken. I show it to her laughing. She said it looks like me. I looked again and it kind of does. FML
Today, my mom took a picture of me. All she could say about the picture was, "At least your sister is pretty." FML
Today, I was talking with my mom about getting my school photos retouched. I believe her exact words were, "They'll take one look at you, and charge me triple." FML
Today, my mom wanted to send me a picture of me at graduation, saying that I looked pretty in it. It was a picture of a different girl; definitely not me. Way to go, mom. FML
Today, formal portraits of my entire class were posted online, with about five photos per person. As my mom was looking at them, she was commenting about how pretty all my classmates look. When she got to my photos, all she had to say was, "Ugh". FML
Today, my mom and I were looking at pictures from the beach. She goes, "That is a REALLY ugly picture of Michelle" (my cousin). The picture was of me. FML
Today, I got my daughter's school pictures. Instead of smiling, she did the duck face. She's 6. FML
Today, I noticed that a picture of me on my mum and dad's wall looked different. On closer inspection, I realised they'd recently painted over my teeth with white paint. I asked them why, and they said they looked 'discoloured'. It's my wedding photo. FML
Today, when I visited my grandmother at her nursing home, I was looking at pictures she had of all the grandkids. All were normal graduation pictures etc. but mine was a cutout where she made me skinnier. FML
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Top comments
tekcor 2
If you're taking a portrait, shouldn't everybody be facing the camera? If so, what would they remove? Your stomach? I think it would look really strange to see somebody with no midsection. Regardless, Photoshop doesn't work that way. Everybody believes that doctoring somebody out of a photo is a few clicks. Wrong. There must be data to work with first. How can you remove a person from a photo when you don't know what is behind the person? Dust marks and skin blemishes are easy, they are small enough that the human eye won't notice a little creative blending. A skilled artist can blend faces together and work some real magic. Photoshop is a fantastic tool, but it is certainly not some magic bullet that will do whatever you want quickly. So to an actual professional Photoshop user, your story sounds like she was just busting your balls. "Photoshop out your gut" is not only illogical, it would require more work than the studio is willing to do.
Craig92EIRE 0
you shouldve asked why she didnt photoshop out hers aswell:)
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Comments (38)
melonkelly 0
first
gearsawar2 0
I should have had first..... dick
perdix 31
Why do you want the first dick?
whataloadofbull 0
HAHAH owned.
greenltrn2003 0
who would want used dick?
HarperGirl 4
rofl
becctaylor4 0
shattered
whataloadofbull 0
by OAR
Craig92EIRE 0
you shouldve asked why she didnt photoshop out hers aswell:)
sjoe789 0
haha nicee but that sucks I'm sorry
sasharaee 0
duuude, that sucks.
TrollTrollTroll 0
you're so sixy.
stlcardsftw 0
haha lose some pounds :P
KRYPTON1T3 5
I agree ydi!
exquisite 0
Truth hurts sometimes
tekcor 2
If you're taking a portrait, shouldn't everybody be facing the camera? If so, what would they remove? Your stomach? I think it would look really strange to see somebody with no midsection. Regardless, Photoshop doesn't work that way. Everybody believes that doctoring somebody out of a photo is a few clicks. Wrong. There must be data to work with first. How can you remove a person from a photo when you don't know what is behind the person? Dust marks and skin blemishes are easy, they are small enough that the human eye won't notice a little creative blending. A skilled artist can blend faces together and work some real magic. Photoshop is a fantastic tool, but it is certainly not some magic bullet that will do whatever you want quickly. So to an actual professional Photoshop user, your story sounds like she was just busting your balls. "Photoshop out your gut" is not only illogical, it would require more work than the studio is willing to do.
idkweird 0
My boyfriend can do that kind of stuff without a LOT of hard work. He does graphic desing for a living and is an expert in photoshop. Ive seen him do an amazing job for a picture he needed to change for a postcard. He photoshopped out cars and light posts that were in the way. It took him about an hour, I believe. It was pretty awesome, IMO. So, an expert wouldn't have too much of an issue with fixing up a picture.
tekcor 2
Depends on your resources. If you have two pictures, such as one of your backrop and one of your subject on the backdrop, then swapping parts of one picture for another is trivial. But if you have single picture, you're pretty much hosed. The computer cannot possibly know what was behind the item which was removed. Best one could do is interpolation, cloning, and blurring - and on larger objects, it'll be quite noticeable. I'm not saying magic can't be done. I am saying the BS you see on TV is impossible. You can't just select a person and press delete. How does the computer know what was there? Or better yet, what wasn't there. How does it know if there should be a wall, a toaster, a picture, or Bob Sagat behind the person? It doesn't.
aabballdude 0
ya i took a photoshop class when I was a freshman in high school and we learned how to remove things from pictures,
idkweird 0
#23. When he did the postcard, he only had the one picture. There was no substitution from another picture. There was also another picture where he had to actually remove two large vehicles from a podium in front of a casino. I guess it all just depends on your level of expertise. I know you can't simply click on a person and remove them. Ive seen him work. He's just absolutely excellent at what he does. In a portrait studio, Id assume it would be even easier because you can clone the background. Theyre not usually very intricate backgrounds in a portrait studio.
tekcor 2
Yeah, of course a portrait studio would have a very easy time obtaining a "clean" image to substitute data from. But unless the "victim" was standing to the side, the need for any Photoshop work is minimal. My point stands though. It is impossible to remove something from a photo without something to replace it. The best source is a clean image to work from, but that is usually not available. Instead, the area needs to be replaced "by hand" in a way, using a combination of cloning, blurring, and the plain old paint brush. Unfortunately that method leaves artifacts behind. Artifacts that a fellow expert would notice, but the untrained eye would not. I don't know your boyfriend's methods, neither do you. I'm not contesting that other people have skill. You do seem to be trying to tell me I'm wrong, despite the fact that you don't actually know for yourself, not being your own boyfriend and all. I've used Photoshop nearly every day for the last 15 years, and I'm paid a full salary for what I do. I'm not saying your boyfriend is wrong, unskilled, or anything of the sorts. In fact, I don't care. You are however dancing around the fact that you believe your boyfriend to be some god of Photoshop, when you don't actually know anything about the work he does beyond that which can be explained to a layman in a basic conversation. Eh whatever. I'm done with this conversation. I should know better than to try to make a point on the internet. In the end, it all amounts to beating a dead horse.
whataloadofbull 0
LOL