Today, I started my first day at work. When I used the bathroom, I thought I was peeing into the bowl but it was actually leaking out. My pants kindly cleaned up the mess. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while using the bathroom I gave the toilet a courtesy flush, only for it to overflow and soak my pants. That would've been bad enough even if I hadn't been at work, with five hours left on my shift and no change of clothes. FML
Today, after a 2-hour meeting, I rushed to take an urgent dump. Unbeknownst to me, my urine was not hitting the porcelain bowl, but rather the underside of the lid. As it pooled around the pedestal, it soaked my pants, underwear, and when I stood up to button my pants, it got on my shirt too. FML
Today, I was holding in pee because i was so busy at work. When I finally got up to relieve myself, I pulled down my pants, sneezed at that exact moment and peed all over the bathroom floor. FML
Today, my work finally hired someone to replace some leaky pipes. I work in the basement by myself, and just as I walked under the newly-fixed pipes, I got soaked with what appeared to be water. Apparently it was connected to a toilet. My boss couldn't find a replacement, so they made me work covered in piss. FML
Today, working at a daycare centre, when packing up the kids' beds after sleep time, I slipped and landed in a puddle. Of urine. I had no spare pants. I had to wear them for the rest of my shift. FML
Today, I went to get blood and urine tests done before work. As I was attempting to aim into the cup, I lost balance and slipped. I ended up peeing on my sleeves and my pants. I was late for work and I smelled like pee. FML
Today, I really had to pee at work and rushed to the urinal. I unzipped but couldn't find the hole in the front of my boxers and ended up pissing my pants. I had put my boxers on backwards. FML
Today, I wore new trousers to work. As I walked to my desk, I noticed a weird damp patch near my zip. Panicking, I thought I'd pissed myself. I rushed to the bathroom, then figured out that it was the condensation from my lunch container, which was in my bag that I had on my lap during the bus ride to work. FML
Today, I was using a mall bathroom. Thinking the toilet seat had to be unsanitary, I decided to squat. I was a little farther out than I thought, and ended up peeing all over the bathroom floor. FML
Today, I took a dump at work. When I went to flush the toilet, it clogged and began to overflow. I left the bathroom as it was and as I walked out, my boss came in. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
stryder9090 28
Wait...you missed, sitting down?
pjsr 33
You should aim to do better on day 2
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (31)
stryder9090 28
Wait...you missed, sitting down?
lukian_fml 29
If OP is male: some toilets don't have a "guy front" seat. They're super annoying. You literally have to hold your penis below the seat level and point it down or away from escaping. If OP is female: that's an interesting skill!
crushcrusher 33
If OP is female, i think she hovered over the toilet.
SixthSinEnvy 39
Or sometimes if you "release" too strong it'll splatter out the front between the seat and bowl. Usually if you've been holding waaay too long and have been running for the toilet.
justarandomalien 7
Sometimes (being a female myself, and having this happen to me *at home thankfully) if you don't sit back far enough on the seat it leaks through the crack between the seat and the actual toilet and spills onto the floor
Liss5477 6
If it doesn't have the "guy front" seat you can always lift the seat...
Bearsmomma 30
16...#5 meant when sitting, and nobody would want to lift the seat first for that!
CaptainSmith28 19
It happens to the best of us. I'm sure Michael Phelps has done it at least once.
stryder9090 28
Yeah Michael Phelps has to sit to pee because it gives him a break from carrying the Unites States on his back every Olympics.
pjsr 33
You should aim to do better on day 2
NephilimPie 15
+1
jonny201 11
Sadly, this has happened to me too OP, just have to be more careful next time
vinnie_boombotz 15
Sorry, OP. At least now you know, that's why you always carry an extra set of clothes in your car.
OnAMission 5
You must have been pissed.
thatannoyingdude 19
Well that's a shitty situa......NO that pun does not apply here. Nor is it ever funny.
manofmerr 27
That pun pissed me off
skottyp 6
lol why does everyone downvote all the good comments?
arrow007archer 19
Don't worry OP it happens to the best of us. Congratulations on your new job!
andrmac 25
Didn't your mom or dad teach you to pee in the potty? Call me an ass but I just don't get how adults do this!
Emma1562 35
You know you're supposed to pull your pants down before you pee right?
TheRareDoge 12
Well better luck next time OP. We all make mistakes.