Today, was my uncle's funeral. He was cremated, and his wish was to have his ashes spread into the sea. As we were waiting for the waves to come and take him away, a group of seagulls came by picking at all his ashes. I guess he tasted good. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, we spread my uncle's ashes at my grandparents' house. We were on a hill overlooking a sunset. It was a beautiful ceremony… until the winds changed direction. Our whole family wound up covered in my Uncle. He's still stuck in my hair. FML
Today, we went to disperse my father's ashes in his favorite lake. My brother was anxious to show off to his new wife, and took us to a fancy resort on the lake. He fell into the lake with my dad's ashes. Nobody laughed when he got out. Oh and as he's a stingy ass, I ended up paying for the trip. FML
Today, after pulling an all-nighter, I fell asleep at the beach. My friends took the opportunity to bury me in the sand, place food all around me, and wait for a flock of hungry seagulls to attack me. To top it off, they taped it all. FML
Today, after a stressful series of events, I went to the beach to unwind. I sat on the sand, breathed in deeply and closed my eyes, trying to find some sort of inner peace. Then a seagull shat on me. FML
Today, at the beach, a seagull conveyed its opinion of my cigarette by taking a dump on it, putting it out. Seems they have anti-tobacco sniper seagulls now. FML
Today, my friends and I went to the beach. We were tanning when I suddenly saw 10 roses floating in the ocean. I went around to pick up all the roses and threw the petals at my friends. Then I noticed that a big boat of people in black and white were looking at me with disgust. It was a funeral. FML
Today, my dog died and I told my grandfather I wanted her to be cremated. I came home later to find him burning her in our barbecue pit. FML
Today, at my grandad's funeral, as my dad and aunt poured his ashes into the hole, a strong gust of wind blew the ashes into my throat. I choked on my grandad. What made it worse was that the vicar had to stop her prayer to laugh. FML
Today, my dog died. We planned to get her cremated and keep the ashes. My sister put forward the idea of putting the ashes in our food so our dog can be "inside of us, always." She's completely serious. I'm scared to eat food from her now. FML
Today, my favorite fish died. To make things better my parents thought to take me out to dinner. We ate sushi. FML
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Top comments
toelie 26
They will have to poo eventually though, so chances the ashes'll end up in the sea after all (or on someone's head) are pretty good.
MandaMalice 0
When my Uncle died he told my Aunt to put his ashes in a douche so he could rest in his favorite place. No! I did NOT ask her if she did it!
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Comments (134)
anna_gee 0
Yikes, that sucks.
ZomgWeAreClubKid 0
That's really sucks but, on the bright side the birds will eventually poop him out everywhere & some bits will make it back to the ocean.
LoLbabeex3 0
awee! that's so sad.... my dad wants the same thing for him when he dies.... if that happened to one of my family members, I'd e hysterical crying.... I'm so sorry for your loss. and WTF? how can people give you YDI. that's just wrong....
lilly1185 3
Wait- don't you realise when people are buried they get eaten by worms, maggots and other bugs? When stuff dies it gets eaten by something- circle of life.
cajekraze 7
OP, quit trolling. You should be scattering 500 feet from shore for one. For two, cremated remains are pebble sized at most, by law. Seagulls would not pick at them, there is nothing left of edible material after 3 hours at 1650-2000 degrees Fahrenheit. So even if you're an ass and think beach scattering is okay, the rest of your story makes no sense.
mintcar 10
Seagulls are satan.
ItalianFilipino 0
damn , that sucks so much I'm so sorry :(
navylover0419 0
how can you people say ydi. their family member died and they were respecting his last wishes. that's just sick and wrong to say that.
oldenuff2party 3
that's gross
AshDramatiicsxz 2
Well seagulls like to eat everything and thats gross , he must have tasted GOOD :
tanz182 0
(May contain a spoiler alert!) Atleast they didn't fly into your face like in 'The Big Lebowski'. Just saying that it could've been more of an FML.