Today, two of my girlfriends and I went to a bar. The only action any of us got was a 50 year-old man who came up and handed us, "An origami vagina for the pretty ladies." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, as a romantic gesture, my boyfriend gifted me an origami vagina. FML
Today, my husband and I visited a new bar in our city. It turned out to be a swingers sex club. He asked if we could stay and try it out, even though we were easily the oldest people there by about 30 years. FML
Today, I went to the bar with some friends. When we walked in, we picked a table at random in the same area as a bunch of older men. The oldest, fattest, ugliest man at the table looked me over then stared at my chest. He then started to motorboat the air in the direction of my boobs. FML
Today, I was out clubbing, when I saw a pair of very cute girls sitting at the bar, so I went over, hoping to introduce myself. I swung my leg over the stool, and through no fault of my own, sat on my own balls. I quickly got thrown out for "harassing the ladies." FML
Today, my friends and I were walking past a bar. There were a few cute guys "rating" every girl that walked by with number cards. My friend, who is a guy, got an 8. I got a 2. FML
Today, at a bar, a woman approched me and tried to set me up with her friend. Looking around, the only people in the bar were a man reading the paper and a very ugly woman, looking at me and smiling. I worriedly replied, "I'm sorry, but I'm gay." Turns out her friend was the one reading the paper. FML
Today, I was given a wedgie by a complete stranger in a crowded bar. FML
Today, I went to a nearby nightclub with some friends and the girl I've been flirting for weeks. We were having a good time until this girl and two of her friends got back complaining about some "drunk-old-perverts harassing them". It looks like my dad and his friends are having a good time too. FML
Today, while sitting in a bar, I offered to buy the drunk chick sitting next to me a drink. She was a lot more inebriated than I thought, because she looked at me with bloodshot eyes and cheerfully responded, "There's a rotten smell in my vagina!" FML
Today, my girlfriend and I went on a date. I went to the bathroom. When I came back, she was sitting at a different table flirting with a guy that looked twice as old as her. FML
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Top comments
teehee520 0
Lmao, an origami vajayjay?! That's pretty awesome.
narwhalz 0
Just imagine what he can do with those hands!
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Comments (131)
stfuminjakid 0
I wanna see the origami ****** o.O
The_Frost 0
I have never heard of a group of girls going to a bar and having a problem with picking up a guy. Did you talk to anyone?
ejvlols 0
aww man i wish i had an origami vagine. seriously, consider yourself lucky
allseeingeye 0
Maybe you were in the wrong bar.
monkey_around 0
makes a good story no matter how off that old dude is for handing out origami vaginas oh and if u want to learn how to make dirty origami theres a book im sure you could google or something called PORNOGAMI lol
24788 7
lol, just wasn't your night.
monkey_around 0
hahaha i like how #58 actually stuttered in his long speech LOL though i do agree with that middle paragraph but seriously dude u don't even know those women. don't just make assumptions about their weight and things like that. jeez man! chill :P
mcsnelly 5
that's about the creepiest thing i've heard....did he actually think that might impress anyone?? To all the people calling the OP ugly and fat, you have no idea! Don't just assume that because they weren't hit on all night or had some creep come up to them, that they're gross!! And you also don't know that they were at the bar ONLY to get action. Maybe the OP was just saying that this was the only action they got to make the point that there weren't a bunch of guys coming up to them all night and just one of them happened to be a creep??
Eiotlrd 0
cry me a river!!! it's at least ten times harder to get laid for guys do you ever see posts like? "I've gone to the bar Friday, Saturday, Sunday, and still havn't got laid. FML"
skierguy 0
Wow, you must be real dogs to have trouble getting hit on by drunk guys.