Today, there are people working in my bathroom. I have the shits. The only place I could think to go was in my cats litter box. I've used it twice and am now contemplating using it a third time. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I urgently needed to use the bathroom at my boyfriend's house. When I went to flush, it wouldn't go down the pipes. After about ten panic-filled minutes, I noticed the cat litter box. I carefully scooped out my logs, and buried them in the cat litter. FML
Today, I had to clean human excrement at work when the fitting room turned into the shitting room. FML
Today, after my landlord has refused to fix the bathroom plumbing problem in my apartment for several days, I had to buy cat litter for myself. FML
Today, I had to pee in the kitchen sink because my bathroom is being completely revamped, and the only other toilet in the house is my parents'. They refuse to let anyone use it. FML
Today, someone shat liquid poo in the hallway at work. Right. Outside. The bathroom. Another foot and they could have used a toilet instead of the carpeted floor. FML
Today, both toilets in my house were occupied, so I had to shit outside. FML
Today, I have horrible diarrhea because of IBS. If I was at home, this wouldn't be that big of an issue, but I'm at work and I don't have access to a bathroom all the time. I also found out I have about 10 minutes to get to the toilet or else I'll probably shit myself. FML
Today, I was glued to the toilet all day, gushing fountains of crap, due to my own bad cooking. It got so bad that I ran out of toilet paper and had to desperately jump in the shower and stay there for nearly two hours. I can't even feel my own asshole any more. FML
Today, I had to shit worse than I thought possible at work. I left my desk and hurried towards the bathroom, dropping trou as soon as the door closed. I then tripped over my pant leg, hit my head on the toilet, and came to some minutes later with my ass spewing diarrhea like a volcano. FML
Today, I was told to put away the new toilet paper rolls. I reached in the package only for my hand to get wet, and then noticed the yellow liquid at the bottom. My cat used it as a litter box. At least, I hope it was my cat. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
SkoomaKi 28
All I can think is: Your cat is going to kill you.
MortenM 17
It's a tough one to ask for though. I wouldn't be very comfortable asking my neighbours whether I could punish their toilet - repeatedly
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (100)
QueenofWheels 13
Wonder where the cats were? Shocked they didn't attack her.
puffthekraken 7
You're ******** that much a day? What? do you live off taco bell?
asherm 15
Try Imodium
tehdarkness 21
No Starbucks nearby?
Evil_Wench 16
Never let anyone tell you that you're not creative, OP!
kingoftheawkward 5
Beware the eyes of judgment from your cat.
that_arian 9
Use your neighbors depending on how violent the ***** are
mullet3388 16
Go grab some adult diapers!! Or use ur panties
NemusKiller 5
It's never late to become CATMAN!
False_Stupidity 42
Or cat woman, since the OP is female.
False_Stupidity 42
An FML about a woman with diarrhea, desperate enough to have to resort to ******** in her cats' litter box because the bathroom is being worked on and is out of order.