Today, the guy I like asked me what he should do for the girl he has a crush on. I told him to give her flowers and tell her how he feels. Later that day my doorbell rang, and he stood there holding flowers. He said the magical words, "My car broke down, can you give me a lift?" FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, the girl I like was panicking because her car broke down, so I offered her a lift to wherever she needed to be. I drove her to her boyfriend's house. She asked me to drive her home in the morning. FML
Today, I bought the girl I like a bouquet of roses saying "Anonymous" on it, and left it on her front porch. She saw it, and called the guy she thought it was from. He said, "You're welcome!" and now they're going out. FML
Today, a guy's car broke down in my street, so I helped him push it into my driveway, checked his car out, and gave it a jump start. He thanked me, then as he went to pull out, he instead smashed straight into my car. FML
Today, I bought my crush a bouquet of roses plus one fake. The line was going to be, "I'll stop loving you when the last rose dies." I told my best friend and he thought it was such an amazing idea that he stole the fake rose and gave it to her himself. Guess who got the girl. FML
Today, the boy I like, came to my house with a dozen roses to ask me to homecoming. My uncle chased him down the street with a pitchfork. FML
Today, the boy I like came to my house with a dozen roses to ask me to homecoming. My uncle chased him down the street with a pitchfork. FML
Today, I had a fight with my boyfriend over a girl he is close to. He later arrived with flowers for what I thought was an apology. He was actually breaking up with me; the flowers were for her, he just didn't want to leave them in the car. FML
Today, a guy I've liked for a while asked if he could talk to me during break. He'd never done that before, so I was excited and said yes. As soon as we both sat down, he asked if I'd help him get a date with my best friend. FML
Today, my friend, on whom I have a crush since I can remember, read the most beautiful poem to me, which he'd written himself. After reading it, he said that it was for a girl he likes, and asked me if it was good. FML
Today, I got flowers sent to my work, I happily opened them in front of my co-workers thinking they were from my crush, I open the card to see "Love you, from mom". My mother thinks my love life is so pathetic, thats she needs to send me flowers to cheer me up. FML
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Top comments
thrifting 18
How terribly disappointing. I know them feels.
Jonniii 10
Take the flowers as an exchange for fuel.
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Comments (100)
Merylwen 24
Sounds like a chick-movie scene. You could sell your stopy, OP.
DKjazz 20
R and P are nowhere near each other on the keyboard, but stopy is such a silly sounding word, and it made me smile.
bikramkohli 11
Not everyone has a qwerty-pad on their phone. In the good ole' days, P and R were on the same button - number 7.
Merylwen 24
Actually, that's what happens when you borrow a phone that has Czech auto-correct.
FlinkeMeisje 5
I had a phone like that until a few months ago. Soooo, the good old days were late 2013!
Krispies_fml 17
Why don't you tell him you like him Op?
livelife1234 11
Should have given him the lift. Lift to South America.
AboveAll04 14
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
she probably would've loved to have given him a lift ;) in the pants !
Ashamed_Sister 60
I think that's called being friendzoned.
AboveAll04 14
"Stacy can't you see you're just not the girl for me...."
perry_sameh20 18
Oh darling im so sorry. I know it feels :(
jw90 18
Sorry OP. sucks getting your hopes up then getting disappointed like that.
mekoveya 10
While that must have been disappointing, you can't expect him to know how you feel. Perhaps you should take your own advice and buy him flowers and tell him how you feel.
angeluv_2014 22
Holy ******* shit!! that suuuucks OP damn it. thats probably the worst fml ever and theres some bad ****** shit on here. ****! that musta sucked
eddeeezzyy 19
Are you on crack?
yourmurderscenex 13
way over dramatic....
Stormdriven37 6
Not that my opinion really matters, but the worst FML was probably the Facebook message from the brother that has been deceased for 2 years
Obey_StudBoii 23
Please learn how to spell.
buckdharma 38
You seem like the type of girl who will get plenty of flowers.