Today, someone asked when my baby was due. I'm not pregnant, but I was so embarrassed to be mistaken for a pregnant lady that I rubbed my tummy and said "December." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while shopping in the baby department at a local department store, a woman approached me asking when I was due. I told her that I was due in 4 months. I lied. I'm not pregnant. FML
Today, a stranger at the grocery store rubbed my belly and asked me when I'm due. I'm not pregnant. FML
Today, I was asked when my baby is due. My baby was due 6 months ago. FML
Today, while on the bus, a small child asked me if I was having a baby, and I replied "Yes." I'm not. I was just too ashamed to admit I was fat. FML
Today, a customer greeted me with, "So! When's the baby coming!?" I'm NOT pregnant. I just gain weight in my guts. FML
Today, my boyfriend is so ashamed of me that when someone asked how far along my pregnancy is, he quickly replied "5 months now!" instead of telling them I'm not actually pregnant. FML
Today, I told a coworker I loved her cute baby bump, and asked when 'the little guy' was due. She glared at me and said, “I had the baby two months ago. You saw him a month ago, here, in this office.” FML
Today, my mother asked a woman at the clothing store we go to all the time when her baby was due. Turns out the woman isn't pregnant. FML
Today, at school, one of my students confidently told me that I "wasn't hiding my baby bump very well anymore." I'm not pregnant. Just fat, apparently. FML
Today, my new coworker asked if I knew her daughter. I responded yes and asked how her pregnancy was going. She didn't know her daughter was pregnant. FML
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Top comments
Rico_Mal1116 0
Go with the flow all ways works.
tehspy1337 0
Next time say "it's yours"
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Comments (203)
lyndz_20 8
can't imagine how deeply embarassing that must have been, sorry OP :(
swasticop 0
Next time just ask them when their nose job is.
MerrikBarbarian 9
I get asked that by people and I'm not fat at all. just prone to bloat due to medical issues. sucks, but seriously make it awkward for them by informing them you are not pregnant. it's pretty rude for people to assume. if people knew anything they would know fat or bloat looks far different from a pregnant belly.
VeganVampyre 27
Thank you! That's what I was going to say. Being pregnant looks nothing like being fat.
iChel413 6
Oh yeah. A pregnant belly is way different then a fat belly. I wouldn't say anything unless I was sure!
Carebear423 0
I agree! preggo bellies are round and firm. fat bellies are jiggly and have rolls. big difference!
xNephilim 19
My MIL has a medical issue that makes her bloat... To random people who only see her for a short amount of time, she would look pregnant.
fantasyworld 39
To me pregnant bellies are more round while fat bellies are more oval.
RockstarRN 10
I always wanted to do the opposite. Say I wasn't pregnant and look puzzled when I actually was. People need to keep their mouth shut unless they see the baby making an entrance!
churchic 5
Couldn't have said it better woman!
ghost_mp 0
too true!!!!
juliaaalove 8
You should have been like " I just had a miscarriage.."
ImInABox 6
Decembruary? That's what I woulda said. And I would've gone into a whole story of how the baby is addicted to crack already and that I can't afford the baby and my addiction.. Hence why the baby is going up for adoption.
DonYoshi 2
you must be fat..
churchic 5
People need to shut up. And if you look preggers then I highly suggest going to the gym and shedding off some pounds. I'm not trying to be rude but it's unhealthy to be overweight, just sayin'
jessesgirl14 16
I agree! If you can't find a good gym then start walking! Being over weight will lead to more serious problems than just looking pregnant...
MerrikBarbarian 9
it's possible to be healthy weight and look pregnant to people. you can have minor bloating and people will ask you, because if you are slim and bloat even a little... your belly looks rounder and people assume. based on the December date she gave I'd assume she's not especially heavy
churchic 5
Fair enough sir/ma'am - I never thought of it like that but now that you mention it I totally agree
MerrikBarbarian 9
ma'am would be correct. ;)
NaomiMadison 4
Flaunt your curves girl, just because you have them doesn't make you any less beautiful. :)
SlyTendencies 1
^ Obesity is not attractive, please do not take this advice, fat girls.
RebekahBrooke 9
depends on how many 'curves' you have. 2, like a hourglass, or 15. with all the rolls!
rawr9able 4
62, the chubby chasers think otherwise. Don't like thick girls? Don't date em'. Not everyone has the same taste in women as you do so please don't be such an ignorant **** nugget. :3
commietaco 0
yea! please eat too much and get fat because that is soo hot.
lalala2589 0
Curves are attractive. However, curvy does not mean overweight. Having a nice curvy body doesn't mean looking pregnant.
lilahhgee 0
-62..lmao xD
SamBaBam98 0
u shoulda said I'm not fat I'm fluffy gotta luv Enrique igleseas
NaomiMadison 4
It's Gabriel Iglesias, he's awesome. :)