Today, Santa ran over my foot with a Segway. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I saw Santa. He gave me the finger. FML
Today, I was taking a stroll in our yard, when my mother decided it would be hilarious to run me down with her Segway. FML
Tis the season…
Today, I was mugged by a guy in a Santa suit. FML
The Brian Harvey
Today, I managed to run over my own foot with my own car. FML
Move, bitch! Get out the way!
Today, my dad ran over my foot with his work truck. FML
Today, I accidentally knocked over a mall Santa on his way to meet some children. I've never had that many hate-filled eyes on me at once. FML
Today, I was the victim of a drive-by egging by some bastard riding a Segway. He still got away. FML
Today, an old lady steamrolled over my foot with her wheelchair, then laughed as she slowly rolled away, leaving my toes in ruins. FML
Steady as she goes
Today, I tried to walk on the sidewalk. Actually, it was so slippery that I had to shimmy across it. Then I shimmied too quickly and fell down. Now everything hurts. Maybe next time I should bring a sled. FML
Today, I managed to break my ankle by running it over with the wheelchair I've used on a daily basis for the last 6 years. FML
Top comments
Goddess_Rummy 13
Is it because you have been naughty this year?
boofgall 16
A Segway? Times sure have changed.
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Comments (108)
nick3600 22
Move, bitch. Get out the way.
christianriddle1 5
Best fml ever
TrustBroke 9
it's always the short stories that are the most interesting
AksentNetharia 12
Too much Happy Wheels?
Angelica124 13
Did this happen at a school in VA?