Today, out of habit, after scratching my balls, I then smelled my hand. It was at that moment I realized most of my gym was staring at me. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was in a shopping center when I went to the toilet. I came out, washed my hands and suddenly got a massive itch in my crotch. Without thinking I itched it. I then had to walk around the center with a wet hand print on my crotch. FML
Today, I started biting my nails, before I realized I'd forgotten to wash my hands after taking a massive dump. FML
Today, at the gym, I caught sight of myself in the mirror while lifting weights and thought, “Damn, I look good!” I smiled. Then I realized the mirror was actually a window. A group of people outside had been watching me flex with a shit-eating grin on my face for God know how long. FML
Today, while at work, I used the restroom. After I noticed we were out of paper towels, I just tried shaking my hands dry. I then readjusted my bra, since it'd been driving me crazy all day. After getting back to my cubicle, I realized that I had two wet handprints over my boobs. FML
Today, I got the feeling that my phone smelt of cigarettes and B.O. I smelt it, realised that it was my hands that smelt, then got confused and thought maybe it was my nose piercing that smelt. I then realised my psychology class was watching me trying to smell my own nose. FML
Today, I noticed that my sweat smelled like cat food. FML
Today, while at the gym, I noticed a foul smell while on elliptical machine. I figured it was the little old lady on the machine next to me. It was so bad I had to leave. When I got in my truck, I realized the smell had followed me. It was me. My cat had pissed on my workout clothes. FML
Today, my thigh was itchy, so I went into a bathroom stall to scratch it. I, for some reason, moaned out loud while doing it. After that, the men's bathroom went completely silent. FML
Today, while at the gym, I noticed a creepy-looking guy watching me. When I got up from the equipment, I noticed that he sniffed the seat. I didn't say anything the first time. After he did it the second time, I asked him to stop. He bent down and sniffed it without breaking eye contact. FML
Today, I was running around the track at school PE with a lot of other students. I noticed a guy who smelled really bad and I thought to myself how disgusting that was and I felt bad for him. Later, I was changing and caught a whiff of my shirt. It wasn't him who was smelly. FML
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Top comments
Sunako_fml 9
That's just disgusting..
Welshite 40
What a disgusting habit. You deserve the contempt of your peers.
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Comments (272)
s0m3guy2010 21
You've taken Molly Shannon's Superstar to a whole new level.
AznSamoan52 10
This is a habit for you? Thats concerning.
TheDrifter 24
What would be the source of that habit? Trying to remember who or what you had sex with recently? Or just to see if you need to shower again?
XKXKKXK 10
Don't be ashamed. Smell your balls with victory. Or don't. Because that's pretty ******* gross.
NothernNightmare 18
Could've been worse. He could've licked his fingers off after...
SqueakyChipmunk 22
ARRRG, SHUT UP 38!!! *gag*
Bluefrog9636 7
Why would you smell your balls???
day624 14
Thats a good question! Idk why people disliked it!
Bluefrog9636 7
I really was asking that, guys why do you sniff your balls? I know OP isn't the only one.
ceccles628 6
Did you at least be discreet and say "Just looking for the chapstick in my pocket. I need to smell it to find it."
5everalone 3
Why would you smell your hand if you know it's not gonna smell good...
cristy91 33
Maybe it's like little kids who smell gross things because they know it smells bad. This is usually seen with weird markers.
WiseGuy79 14
You fully deserve it for doing something like that in public.. You will forever be known at the gym as Capt. Scratch n Sniff haha
challan 19
I think he should be Admiral and his Captain should be the Ear Wax Licker.
tweimorts 4
Hopefully your gym membership is about to be up so you can switch gyms.
jackii1313 9
Wh-who does that..?