Today, I was reading a book in public. Some bastard stranger came over and started spoiling the plot for me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was in the middle of enjoying a really good book while in a waiting room. Someone saw what I was reading and thought it would be cool if she leaned over and told me everything that happens. FML
Today, I presented my assigned chapter for a book we're currently reading in my English class. I really like the book, so I've been reading ahead. When I summarized the chapter, I accidentally spoiled a major plot twist that was actually in the next chapter. FML
Today, I started a new fantasy romance novel. It was very interesting, but then later I read the plot on Wikipedia and spoiled not just the book but the whole series for myself. Why do I do this? FML
Today, I saw a cute guy at the coffee shop reading a book. Wanting to be friendly, I smiled as I approached and asked what he was reading. He returned the smile and said, "Minding your damn business, by Fuck Off." FML
Today, I was in Barnes & Noble and some asshole was walking around with his phone on speaker to hear the baseball game. That asshole was my husband. FML
Today, I went to see Jackass 3 in 3D. While the previews were playing, some guy sitting next to me leaned over and began telling me what happens in every scene, completely ruining the movie for me. He tried to get my number afterwards. FML
Today, I was at the library, and had finally found the book I'd been looking for, when a man approaches me, says "The main character dies at the end", and walks away. FML
Today, I was on the subway, when the girl opposite me suddenly started shouting and accusing me of photographing her. I was reading a book on my phone, and I showed her the screen, but I got shoved around anyway by another guy, who threatened to report me for being a pervert. FML
Today, I was on the London underground reading a newspaper. A huge guy was sitting next to me and there weren't many other people around. As I turned a page, he leaned into me, glaring, and said, "I'm not finished yet". At the next stop I put down the paper and jumped off. It wasn't even my stop. FML
Today, I went to the park to read “The Book Thief”. I fell asleep and when I woke up, my book was gone. FML
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Top comments
DJR_fml 2
Damn them real life trolls...
malfanese 6
I'd be so mad, hit them with the book!
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Comments (121)
malfanese 6
I'd be so mad, hit them with the book!
farkie3 8
You would be proving the saying "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me" incorrect.
Drigr 9
Actually... I'm pretty sure they would be proving the phrase "ruin my book and I'll beat your ass with it"
sens3sfailing 25
Bruce Wilis is dead the whole time.
AssTard 15
Stranger: "Snape kills Dumbledore." OP: FFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUU
FlamingTacos 7
Primrose dies in the last Hunger Games book
AssTard 15
@82: WHY!? I haven't gotten there yet!!!
farkie3 8
89 - I almost hate to say it, but what else did you expect from an FML about book spoilers? Naturally, the trolls are crawling all over this one...
gardenwhipped3 14
The proper response... That reminds me of the story of the rude and inconsiderate stranger that had a death wish. Do you want to know how I killed him?
kxxjoejoexxk 8
Why? Because your still not done with them she gets blown up. Twice.
tommon11 0
What a shitty day
IdaE 17
82- I am going to hunt you down and ******* kill you for saying that. You better start running....
FaygoAndMiracles 18
@82: Wow, thanks, I'm only half way through Catching Fire.
15Erik 21
If it was 50 Shades if Grey, don't worry. No one would be angry.
NopeFuckThat 7
@28 **** you man
DJR_fml 2
Damn them real life trolls...
jtthegr8 26
I trolled people at a McDonalds once ad people were walking in and out of the door.. I'm never allowed to go back there again :(
DogsPaw 16
Just walk 10 feet to the next McDonalds.
AssTard 15
@55: That's too far for McDonald's customers to walk.
gc327072 31
"why all these people always interruptin ME? WHAT I GOTTA DO TO TRY TO MAKE THEM SEE?!?"
eggmarie 25
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Snaps kills Dumbledore?
Welshite 40
Yeah, rubber bands are killer.
UrCapsLockOn 12
#4, THERE'S A SPECIAL PLACE FOR YOU .. IN HELL
ManInTheMachine 20
Right next to that place in hell where people ***** the Caps Lock button.
plaguer 26
I guess Crackle and Pop are going to take out Harry themselves.
eggmarie 25
Aww damn autocorrect changed Snape to snaps. I'm ashamed of myself.
plaguer 26
I think a book about cereal (HA) killers is cooler anyway.
alissa222 15
Who could've known a game of exploding snaps could go so wrong.
cameron194 9
Lol 45, go on YouTube and search "duck face song".. You sadly belong to this group of Un-photogenic people
eggmarie 25
107: why don't you go ahead and read my profile description and realize that my picture is incredibly sarcastic before you speak to me? Thanks.
KolbeLogan 6
Learn English
krazyapples9 4
He dies in the end!
MrPlopper 9
AND SO DO YOU!!!!!
kxxjoejoexxk 8
15 down votes for an incomplete thought. What have these teens done
gdam 4
No he doesnt!
Welshite 40
If you're reading Twilight or 50 Shades of Gray, well, there wasn't much of a plot to begin with.
yankfan89 27
If OP would be reading either of those books the FML would read "I just read Twilight or Fifty Shades of Gray FML".
BigRedDilDoTIME 1
#9 It's 50 shades of Grey fag
TrueTriage 16
Even worse: I just read twilight AND 50 shades of gray. FML
TechnicolorNova 7
That's when the moment you notice what he's saying you either walk away, plug your ears, tell him off, or hit him with the book. At least he would have spoiled less if you had done something. But when someone ruins the plot of something....that is one of the worst things in my opinion. Imagine sitting in class and someone behind you starts talking about Dexter and spoilers the entire 6th season for you and you can't do anything since you're stuck there. That happened to me- so I know the feeling. And commenters, the HP series was spoiled for me with the telling of Snape and Dumbledore, I know the pain! The horrid, horrid, pain.
Drigr 9
And when was that ruined for you? The last book has been out for like over 5 years hasn't it?
TechnicolorNova 7
I read it in 2008. It was released in July of 2007. And your point exactly? Can't really be one considering the movie wasn't out so all of us read the book, well, any of us with any real Harry Potter fandom. I was borrowing my friends copy and she happened to decide to spoil it for me in the midst of reading it.
kiwienne 21
#31 - I never think there's a good reason to spoil anything. I used to read books 2-4 hours a day before high school, and now I don't have time for it. It's really not that tough to ask "Oh, did you read/see that?" If the person says no, shut up! #26 - That really sucks. It took a while before I could get my hands on the book myself - I was almost staying off the internet. Everytime someone was about to reveal something, I put my hands over my ears! :P
Drigr 9
I said that because 4s comment was about snape killin dumbledore and you mentioned "commenters." Wasn't sure if that was ruined just now with that comment. And as you said yourself, real fans of HP knew ages ago. Basically, it came down to "are we epected to never talk about any book ever written because someone may or may not have read it"
T9FTW 20
Oh. My. Gersh. I was just about to post a comment like this, but decided to scroll down first. :-D
emeraldisle 30
I would definitely be pissed if someone did that to me. Punch them in the face.
emeraldisle 30
13 - I was joking. Obviously punching someone for spoiling a book is not a good reason at all. This is the second comment of mine you've comment on by the way. Are you stalking me?
emeraldisle 30
Damn! Maybe someday I'll be so lucky. ):
olpally 33
Haha, two cats meowing at each other... How cute! Haha :D
emeraldisle 30
Adorable
s0m3guy2010 21
Maybe it's a Walking Dead plot spoiler? If so, then the issue will feature zombies getting shot and people getting bitten. I've ruined it for everyone now.
Jaxx66 21
Actually, while I was still watching season 2, some dick told me which person who was currently big in the plot gets taken out. I was so livid, I looked up spoilers for his beloved firefly series he was watching. We don't talk anymore.
Enslaved 38
Season 1&2 were amazing! But so far, I'm very disappointed with season 3 and what it's come to now. I'll watch a few more episodes and cross my fingers that it'll start to get better.
kiwienne 21
I'm going to watch episode 4 today. I was on funnyjunk and some stupid thumbwhore posted a picture with the two most important things happening in that episode - grrr! :(
daringtoride 27
How can you be disappointed with season three? It's my favorite one! I love that Rick is taking charge. Just watched my recording of episode four, and blew my shit. Rest in peace, two members of the team :( Though I don't like Angela. She flirts with anything that has two legs and a penis. Merle of all people!
SHAMUS_the_WITTY 18
59-Rick won't have charge for very long because *SPOILER ALERT!!!* TURN BACK NOW IF YOU DIDN'T SEE LAST NIGHTS EPSISODE!! ********He******* *Will**Be**** *Mourning****Lori*****
Enslaved 38
It's dragging on very slowly with nothing but gore after gore scenes. I rather more drama then watching zombies getting their heads sliced in two-- for what seems to be most of the show lately. But maybe that's what the people were asking for. . . more killings.
SenselessPattern 12
But Walking Dead is a TV show, not a book.
s0m3guy2010 21
66- It's actually a tv show based off of a graphic novel.
SHAMUS_the_WITTY 18
62- They did drama last season, and all anyone could do was bitch and moan about how there wasn't enough gore or killings. So thank your fellow fans for THAT development. I personally liked the season 2 formula better than this.
Jaxx66 21
I really dislike that they brought a baby into the series, I can only see that ending VERY badly. And not just for lack of a milking breast. I was rooting for it to be a zombie-baby hybrid.
effiestonem154 11
The wording made me lol! Sorry, OP... Ruin their dental work?
Tezoma 28
I absolutely hate when people ruin the plot of something I'm trying to read or watch, whether they be a friend or stranger. FYL, OP.
BigRedDilDoTIME 1
oh yeah sorry spoiler alert