I couldn't agree more. It's always the woman's fault if there's no sex in a relationship, because we all know men are a gift from the gods and the mighty peen can do no wrong. /sarcasm He should lose some weight first and see where that leads. If you don't expect men to sleep with their overweight wives, why should it be any different when roles are reversed?

But that is the point; he's trying to lose weight, and he thinks sex is a good reward FOR losing weight. As in, no sex until he does lose weight. But she doesn't want it either way.

No, he wanted sex every time he lost a pound. When he actually loses the weight and looks good, I guarantee the interest will be there.

They set up the reward system together, so it's just as much her fault as his (I mean, that he would ask for sex as a reward, not that he wasn't getting any) I agree that it sounds like a little much, every time for every pound, maybe per five pounds is better, but "She felt it wasn't fair to punish her just because I lost weight." is what made me think she probably would say no either way.

Why do men suddenly put on weight as soon as they get married and expect their wife to screw them just the same? Look - I can play the stereotypical BS game, too! But in all seriousness, a lot of other things can happen in a marriage causing one or both partners to lose their sex drive; kids, finances, career, et cetera, et cetera. Women do not think "well, I have a husband now, I don't want sex anymore." It's a piss poor stereotype and while I would not doubt that there are a handful of women AND men who use sex to get hooked, the vast majority do not.

Well you play it badly.

You sound like a sore loser, theta.

lol the punisher.....That's just great. And Well I really do think you should talk about it the only way to resolve an issue is to talk it out!

Agreed. I thought that the concept of marriage as an agreement for the woman to spread her legs whenever her husband wanted was far outdated. Apparently FML commenters feel otherwise. If she has physically lost her sex drive, as many women do after menopause, what is she supposed to do? She could do entirely selfless things to please him, but does he do anything for her that merits this? You started out with your hand, most went years before they knew anything different. It doesn't kill you.

Exactly. If the guy is horny, there are other means to get off. His wife doesn't even need to be present for some. What it ultimately comes down to is that no one owes anyone else sex. Nor should it. Thinking that it's the wife's responsibility to have sex whenever her husband wants is archaic, and the reason why marital rape isn't generally treated as a serious crime, even in countries where it is illegal. And aside from complaining about not having sex, the OP and most commenters aren't even considering WHY she doesn't want to have sex. While sex drives can vary, a sudden loss of any interest usually indicates something physically or mentally is going on and should be addressed. Your example of menopause is great; not only are hormones dropping, but things get dry and can be very painful. Just whining about the lack of sex does nothing to solve it and just ends up perpetuating the problem.

um, what the ****?