Today, my wife and I had another couple over. My wife was beside me while we all talked in the kitchen. I turned to put something in the fridge, and the other couple went into the next room. Turning back, I groped my wife's breasts playfully. She screamed and slapped me. It wasn't my wife. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while my husband and I were arguing, he walked away in the middle of my sentence yelling, "Remember babe, you're only my current wife!" FML
Today, I accidentally ran my thumb down the cheese grater while preparing lunch beside my wife. I instantly jerked my hand away from the grater just in time run my forearm across the knife she was using. I now have 20 stitches and 5 staples in my arm, no lunch, and a puking wife. FML
Today, my boyfriend came over so that we could have some "fun". It turns out, his idea of foreplay is squishing my breasts together and making them talk. FML
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend on our couch. Meanwhile, my parents came to visit us without telling me. FML
Today, my wife, who has a drinking problem, looked me straight in the eye as she poured herself a "water" bottle to enjoy while at work. FML
Today, my husband recorded me getting out of bed and sleepwalking all the way into the backyard and straight into our pool. He was too busy giggling like a schoolgirl to help me out. FML
Today, I accidentally punched myself in the face while trying to take my bra off. FML
Today, I found out that the same police officer who has arrested me twice has been sleeping with my wife. FML
Today, my boyfriend stopped by my house after work because he missed me. We made out for a bit outside, which involved some touching and then he left. When I got inside, I got a Facebook message from my older neighbor that read, "That was gross. Please don't do that again in front of me. Really." FML
Today, my wife told me she wanted a divorce. She also confessed that she has been cheating on me with my best friend for 10 years. I appreciated the honesty, but was slightly upset considering we have only been married for 9 years. FML
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Top comments
Squadoosh 0
How do you not realize it wasn't your wife? Unless you just spun quickly and grabbed the first boob you saw.
fmlfmlfml15 0
Lesson learned: Look before you grope
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Comments (110)
GripeApe 0
Today, the woman to whom I'm attached and the man she owns were invited over to another couple's house. The homeowners were standing together by the fridge while everyone conversed. My woman's husband and the hostess went into the next room as the host turned to put something in the fridge and my woman walked toward him. The host swiftly turned about and playfully groped me with his hands. My body's head screamed and it's hand slapped the host. FHL I don't know what the big deal was about - though his hands were a bit chilly from the fridge, they were sexy and felt nice. We'll definitely be visiting again soon if I have any say in the matter. Unfortunately, I don't - I'm a boob. FML
jphatesyou 1
hahaha wow
Lord_Ashour 0
Good luck explaining that to both women.
Audge 0
awh shiit. next time look and make sure its your wife. lol
Rayman1110 0
YDI for not motor boating.
Flying_Man 0
has anybody realised that the wife cheated on the husband so the only reason that he groped was because he thought that his wife might like a good time. his wife is the one who needs chastising
immja 0
come on, scope before you grope.
shetbags 0
Lmfao, that's sounds sooo funny, you couldn't make that shit up!!
kykyshay 0
Be more careful!
Iheardthat 7
why didn't you check before you groped?!?!?