Today, my three year old sister asked me to go to the amusement park with her. Since I was late for work, I politely refused and said we'd go tomorrow. She punched me in the nuts so hard that I could barely walk. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I thought I'd take my little sister to the park. After getting bored of playing on the climbers, she thought it would be funny to throw some mud at me; too bad mud wasn’t the only chunky brown stuff on the ground. FML
Today, I was at the water slide with my two sisters. As we got to the top, my sister wanted me to go first. As soon as I went to go down the slide, she lamped me right in the balls from behind, and pushed me down the slide. My other sister kneed me in the same spot 5 minutes later. FML
Today, my little sister chased me around the house with a mallet, giggling like a maniac. I ended up having to pin her to the ground, rip the mallet out of her hand and lock her in the bathroom. This isn't the first time. My mom still insists it's perfectly normal. FML
Today, I went to drop my little brother off at the nursery. As I walked in, a boy punched me in the dick and ran away. FML
Today, while walking through the park, a little boy came running up to me and hit me in the nuts with a stick. I fell on the ground and looked up just in time to see his mom giving him the thumbs up with a smile on her face. FML
Today, my little sister was being picked on by some kids. After seeing one push her, I went over to talk to them about how bullying isn't cool and how they need to play nice. They beat me up. I'm 22 years-old and got beat up by a group of 10 year-olds. FML
Today, my son trained his little sister to walk up to strangers and whimper: "My mommy punches me." FML
Today, I took my sister and her friend to the new swimming pool in our area. They wanted to go down one of the slides, so I went up with them. At the top of the stairs, my sister's friend kicked me in the balls and then pulled my trunks off. They pushed me down the slide naked. FML
Today, my sister punched me in the face. My dad was actually annoyed with me when I told him. He said I'll never be a "real man" if I can't take a hit from a girl. FML
Today, I told my mom that having watched my sister ruin her life having kids who grew into brats with criminal records before their teens, I refused to ruin my life the same way and will be childless. I then turned to leave and they were in the doorway, my sister and her two brats. I got slapped. FML
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Top comments
RabidBunny 10
Russian toddlers are badass!
Lights_Out_fml 6
Nut shot!!!
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Comments (167)
Rach227 8
yea... I wouldn't let her go to the theme park tomorrow :p
vannessa875 0
ouch :o don't go at all, teach her she can't have everything her way . You can't be owned by a toddler now . Later on shes going to want everything her way no matter what others say .
divadro102 16
Would have been avoided had you not been late. Just saying
jcrizzle 0
Should've taken her to the amusement park bro.
joeyjones000 0
3 years old? that wouldn't hurt
michaelscott69 0
My little sister asked me to take her to the amusement park, I said "Man, what do I look like, a baby sitter?" Then my little sister got angry, made a fist, turns out she has a strong punch, and punched me in my nutsack. I FELL TO THE GROUND!
Isaac_The_Great 0
Learning young.
snowman420 0
Gotta love bein a guy
Cmcnab1997 0
Well, 3 is the new 2
SummerFever 8
Something tells me she'll grow up to be a kickboxer.