Today, my supervisor was watching a video of his son. I heard a voice in the background and asked if it was Elmo. It was his wife. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was on a video call with my boss and some clients. Everything was going smoothly until my 3-year-old son walked in wearing my wife’s high heels and started running circles around me, yelling, “Look at me, I’m a queen!” My boss and clients were visibly confused, and all I could do was laugh nervously, and hope it'll never be mentioned again. FML
Today, someone asked my wife if I was her father. FML
Today, I went to my son's soccer game. I cheered his name at the top my lungs and waved with a grin on my face. I saw him whisper something to a team mate so I watched the film my husband took later that night. His friend asked, "Who is that?" and my son replied, "I don't know some fat bitch." FML
Today, my co-worker handed me the phone and said it was my boyfriend calling, so I answered "Hello, Love!" It was my boss. FML
Today, I was talking to one of my supervisors at my new job. He asked if I knew a professor at the school I recently graduated from, and I decided to babble on about how shitty of a professor he was and how much I loathed his class. He then looked at me and said, "That's my dad." FML
Today, I went to my husband's work to give him lunch. His assistant told me his "wife" was in his office. FML
Today, I saw my son. I didn't know I had a son. FML
Today, my supervisor at work is now my father-in-law. My girlfriend told me that. FML
Today, my husband got on a business call, but he was not using his usual booming, baritone voice. Instead, he was soft and sweet and began with, "Hey, how have you been?" and quickly went into his office. Curious, I listened outside his door. It was a female co-worker. The work talk was waaaay too fun and familiar. FML
Today, I was tutoring. When my kids were finally working on their own, I stood in my classroom’s doorway to talk to my boss sitting outside about upcoming work. Suddenly, one of my students sitting directly behind me let out the loudest fart ever. I think my boss heard and thought it was me. FML
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Top comments
emile_heskey 11
Brought to you by the letters F, M, and L
Helpfulman 17
Plot twist: his wife is Elmo.
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Comments (58)
imhope 23
what does every tickle me Elmo get before leaving the factory? ...two test-tickles?