Today, I went to my husband's work to give him lunch. His assistant told me his "wife" was in his office. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Classic mistake
Today, I saw my husband at a restaurant, laughing with a hot woman. He'd told me he was at a meeting with the VP of his company. Furious, I barged in and started screaming at them, calling him a cheater and a liar. Turns out the woman was actually the VP of his company, and they were in the middle of the meeting. FML
Get out
Today, my husband came home from work in a bad mood. Why? He found out that a certain female coworker of his isn't single anymore. FML
There's no such thing as a coincidence
Today, I ran into my husband and his mistress. He was picking her up at the airport. I was catching a flight to a conference with my boss. He had flowers for her, and his arm around her. My boss knows my husband as well. FML
Today, I went to a social event with a very attractive male co-worker. Things were going awesome, we were flirting and really hitting it off. Then his 'wife' called. FML
Today, I met my husband's other wife. FML
New creepypasta just dropped
Today, I went to work to find my creepy boss sitting in my office. I work the night shift, so it was very unusual to find him there. I asked how he was, and he replied, "I told my wife about us; she kicked me out." I've been working there a month. Also, I'm married and pregnant. So, excuse me, "US?" FML
Today, I met my wife's other husband. FML
Work husbands and work wives
Today, I went to my husband’s work party where employees could bring a plus one. There, I met the colleague he talks so much about. She looked noticeably disappointed and said to my husband, “Wife?! You told me you were single!” We’ve been married for 7 years. FML
Hit and miss
Today, a guy was hitting on me when I was at a café. I told him I was married, but it didn't deter him, so I told him to go away. Later, my husband came home from work with his boss for dinner and sure enough, it was the same guy who was hitting on me. Suffice to say, it was one awkward dinner night. FML
Today, I went to the grocery store with my husband, only to find that his ex-wife worked there. Then I found out he never actually divorced her. FML
Top comments
JSylvestre 6
I'd start raising hell right there and storm into that office.
rangermedic77 5
Caught
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Comments (179)
rangermedic77 5
Caught
Damn_Hippster 11
Maybe his assistant meant girlfriend. Seriously though just leave the cheating bastard!
flockz 20
what makes this worse is that OP's name is "mcjewman".....
ShakeMeDown 12
B-B-Busted!
1bluesky1 6
The assistant shouldn't have said anything in the first place, imo.
zombicidal 11
polygamy is bad M'Kay
yadisingh 5
You're right. It's like a marriage within a marriage :o
Marcella1016 32
Sounds like he needs a new assistant.
shireeniee 8
50: marriageception?
Grimmerie 31
43: Polygamy isn't bad, cheating is. There's a difference.
Eenonymous 1
Haha... Ok #72 into a little polygamy there? In my eyes, polygamy is cheating. If you can't be with just one girl then don't get married. If I were to marry several men, I'd be a **** with issues, but a man with several wives is deeply religious? Please explain to me why he's not a super perv who gets off on being with a different woman every night.
Grimmerie 31
I have a friend who has two boyfriends. All three of them care for each other very much. They live together, sleep together, and are building a family together, and are three of the happiest men I've ever met. I am very happy with my girlfriend, and I personally am monogamous, but see nothing wrong with polygamy or polyamory as long as no one gets hurt.
zombicidal 11
I was just pulling a Mr. macky from south parj
DrDilllonReese 12
As long as all parties involved are okay with it who gives a flying ****?
lemon_phat 11
Well.... It's not legal in the US for one....and it's disgusting, and there is no excuse for doing that..
tona01 16
Well you find it dusgusting, because of the social rules, if we weren't taught that polygamy is bad, we would find it completely normal. A lot of studies show that humans weren't made to stay with one partner unlike some penguins for example. Marriage was created as a way of making connections and securing economical or/and political "peace". If we go filosofical, it is possible to love more than one person, so why not be with both.
nava1210 12
How were you in two places at the same time!?
taty7659 4
Well Thats something new
RedJester23 6
I honestly don't know why you all are bashing the OP's husband. It's not like you know he's cheating. The first thing that went through my mind was that the assistant lied to the OP because her boss might be busy. If you've ever had to call tech support, you'd understand. "Sorry, my supervisor isn't here", or "My supervisor is currently busy." BULLSHIT. I wouldn't worry about it, my guess is that she is just lying to everyone who comes in trying to gain audience with her boss because he told her to. If he has an assistant, he can probably say "I'll be busy for the rest of the day, don't let anyone in my office."
Daralea 21
87, people have different definitions of what a marriage is, you opinion isn't the only "righteous" path. If all parties involved in the polygamous marriage consent and are not being harmed or taken advantage of, never mind your pretty little head about it.
DoubleDose 0
Maybe the secretary said that because she was fed up with him masterbating and thought you storming I would scare him enough to stop
tooFLY 0
113--you, sir, are an idiot. Have you ever heard of google? You've got to check your spelling before posting, less you come off as an idiot. First, you managed to spell disgusting wrong. smh. And it was ever in the post you were replying to. And you spelled philosophical wrong. Good gosh, you weren't even in the ballpark on that one. So dumb.
VDubbGrrl 4
#158, while I appreciate you pointing out that #113 is truly an pretending to be smart, you seem to have made quite a few mistakes.there yourself, buddy. 1. "lesT you come off", not "less you come off.." 2. "and it was eveN..." Not "ever". 3. "Google" (proper noun) 4. Don't begin sentences w/"And"
VDubbGrrl 4
"truly an imbecile.." It cut out the word for some reason.
JSylvestre 6
I'd start raising hell right there and storm into that office.
MagicallyFat 12
Hahaha I would do that ^ and take him for every dime he's got.
tellithowitis 13
What about his pennies??
MagicallyFat 12
^ We'll save those for his other wife. Assuming she doesn't know he was a wife I feel just as bad for her as I do OP
lemon_phat 11
28- **** pennies go after that mother ****** for his quarters!
tellithowitis 13
Nah, I'll stick with the nickels
brettlovesgirls 4
Put his stapler in jello
sydie5 12
Divorce his sorry ass.
darkmis1 18
Why would she tell her husband that his wife was in his office? Also that is most definitely grounds for divorce. You act like the husband would have to commit a murder for the wife to get out of the marriage.
here4theparty 4
SORRY ass? Even with a divorce he has a back up so ya. Probably not that sorry...
MisterEx 28
Hitler happened before. Want another one?
RedJester23 6
Why would you divorce him? Because one person might have lied to you because her boss is busy? I think that the assistant simply lied to everyone that walked in, including you, asking to see her boss. The lie could have been anything, like "He's out at the moment" or "He's in with someone." Could have been purely coincidental that the assistant used "he's in with his wife." You would believe a secretary that you've never met before (I'm only assuming this because the assistant would have probably recognized you if she knew you), over your husband that you've known for X amount of time? I'm baffled that the first thing you bitches would do is "divorce his sorry ass" rather than actually find out for yourself what is happening.
michelleJ11 25
I hope you're not serious 168 ...
idontknowyou123 0
But if your talking to his assistant... Oh... Sorry OP but your husband broke the law. Divorce time me thinks. By the way before someone says it's not against the law to be a bigimast you must live in Utah or Thailand because most of the western world has laws against poligamy (multiple marriages).
sarahDarc 3
or he could be cheating, and to play it off to the folks around, said the other woman was his wife.
sandracore 15
it's not like OP's husband is really married to 2 women..
Ranimal 12
I believe that is why she quoted wife. It's most likely just some affair and told the assistant that it was his wife to make it less suspicious. And calm down with the shit. Unless you are trolling, you're just looking for people to argue with you.
Mr_Alarm 12
Ignore this comment, seems about 500 people beat me to it...
idontknowyou123 0
16 - You are quite intelligent. Or at least more so than the first two that have replied. I say this because you have discovered the real reason I made that comment. Now that you have called me out as a troll I must take my leave.
evilplatypus 39
Having an affair is still illegal in most areas as well. Hell, many states still have laws against sodomy.
Boygenius50 8
I feel like 4/23 wasn't actually trolling, they actually just ****** up and then tried to cover it up by posing as a troll. But hey, whatever makes you feel good. . .
idontknowyou123 0
30 -Maybe I intentionally ****** up so then people can comment about it. I usually go away when I get called out. However you have brought me back. And trust me, there are many ways one can troll. Now... Feed Me Seymour
Marcella1016 32
Pretty fail attempt at trolling, IMHO.
cradle6 13
And then what happened?
thisisafunnyname 12
they died. the end
ShakeMeDown 12
^Predictable.
lilwaynerockz_fml 12
But then a zombie apocalypse.
lemon_phat 11
She punched the assistant, slammed open the door and slapped a bitch.... OBVIOUSLY.
private1111 0
24-I lovee ur mask idea thing. Just really needed to say that in order to live my life on.
Cmdr_Shepard 17
Divorce his sorry ass and get half his stuff. Cheaters deserve nothing less.
sierra142 19
All his stuff. Screw half.
rcbarnes 24
Word.
Happiness2Joy 3
I would just march into his office anyways to see what he and his "wife" are up to.
ThaBeasty01 5
:o
flockz 20
mmmm lunch sounds good right now what did you bring?
natashax21 5
God, I hope she brought bacon....I don't even care if it's spiked. I just can't stop thinking of that bacon castle from the other FML.
sailoroftheseas 7
cockblocked