Today, my step-brother went grocery shopping alone for the first time. He came home with Ramen and 14 bottles of chocolate milk, which will expire by the 20th. My step-dad is insisting we eat it so it doesn't go to waste. FML
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Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, as I searched for food to take to work for lunch, I noticed that the only recent addition to our fridge is chocolate milk and popsicles. My mom went grocery shopping yesterday. FML
Today, my husband offered to do the weekly grocery shopping. Because he has never done the shopping before, I made him a list of what we needed and other optional foods to give him an idea of what to get. He came back with a week's worth of ramen noodles and 2 litres of soda. FML
Today, I found a small bottle of chocolate milk in the fridge from McDonald's. I've been living with my grandparents while going to college and figuring they'd never drink it themselves, I took a sip. It had expired two years ago. FML
Today, the only food in the house is canned beans and vegetables that I can’t stand. My dad refuses to go to the store because, "we can't afford it." Meanwhile, my stepmom just came home with a brand new Gucci purse. FML
Today, I saw my little brother drink from the milk carton, gag, and spit the milk back in. FML
Today, while my mom was out, my family agreed upon the assumption that she has a "shopping problem." I argued against it for quite a while, until she pulled up minutes later with a what seemed like a life-time supply of canned condensed milk. FML
Today, I went into my fridge and someone had drank all the beer. Only my 8-year-old son lives with me. FML
Today, we have nearly no food in the house. My husband went shopping with the kids and returned with a sack of tomatoes. Time to make lunch. FML
Today, my 6-year-old cousin came to my door, demanding canned food. I asked him what for, and he said, "Dad said I needed them for a school project." I said all right, and he started raiding my pantry. I was left with only green beans. He stole all my Spaghetti O's. FML
Today, my dad opened my fridge, let rip a horrible fart into it, then closed it and said "There ya go, a little somethin' for supper." FML
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Top comments
taymichele16 15
How old is your step brother?
Otherhats 20
He's gonna do great in college.
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Comments (87)
Mathalamus 25
At least it's chocolate milk.
taymichele16 15
How old is your step brother?
Levi2411 41
Maybe I'm childish in this aspect, but I'm 19, and I drink at least three bottles of chocolate milk a day.
SubparAtBest 23
childish maybe but 3 bottles a day doesn't sound very healthy...
Levi2411 41
@59 Probably not, but I just love chocolate milk. I don't have a "stop, that's enough" button. I think I have a problem. I ran out of it the other day, and I just stared into space and contemplated my choices in life.
MariaGiovanni 25
37 that sounds like a serious problem. like some sort of obsession issue.
tounces7 28
Are we talking about GALLONS though, or just small bottles? Because big difference between an 8 oz bottle and a 128 oz gallon.
Geraldinehoney 11
Guys me and my two siblings can drink one full jug a day if we wanted to we did it once and my mom was like okay no more chocolate milk
Otherhats 20
He's gonna do great in college.
may14th 26
He's perfected the college student food stash.
mikuxxhatsune 32
You have 6 days and at least 2 people! Thats about 3 bottles a day. YOU CAN DO IT
ShirtlessWonder 17
Sorry to break it to you, but I think you did your math wrong, bud.
GhostFox 34
Three people, 6 days, 14 bottles of milk. If each person drinks one bottle a day, they'll be gone by the end of the fifth day.
Wondermage 5
Also if you include the day this FML was submitted (13th), if they each drank 2/3 of a bottle every day they'd be finished by the 19th. Or the step-dad and step-brother could drink one a day and OP wouldn't even have to touch it (though it would probably make a nice change from the tap water since the step-brother didn't buy any other drinks)
UhHuhHoney 20
Lol lesson learned here: Step-brother is not to grocery shop without adult supervision.
bre88 18
Make lots and lots of milkshakes. Might be good in some cereals too.
techiejames 8
It's great in Frosted Flakes.
KatieJBabe 27
Coco pops in chocolate milk is the ultimate combination
heyitsaliciaaa 20
Chocolate milk is the best kind of milk though
Johnm165 9
Chocolate milk inflicted diabetes is the best kind of diabetes
mds9986 24
Mmm carbs
nyf137 20
I wonder if he actually went to the grocery store, or when shopping at the dollar store... either way, he needs to be a big boy before shopping alone again