Today, my soon to be ex-wife told her friends that we're getting a divorce because I'm physically abusive. I guess that sounded better than the truth: that she waited 8 months into her pregnancy to tell me that the child probably isn't even mine. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my my soon to be ex-wife found out I was telling the truth and never cheated. She wanted to get back together but I told her that we're too far into the divorce proceedings to turn back, and there's just no fixing our marriage. She then told me she's filing for full custody with no visitation rights. FML
Today, my ex showed up at my doorstep, claiming to be pregnant with my baby. Of course, I pointed out we broke up ten months ago and hadn't seen each other again until just now, and she is currently six months along. She actually admitted to my face that she figured I'd be too stupid to put the pieces together. FML
Today, my ex called, saying she's 3 months pregnant. She seems to have forgotten that we haven't been in the same room, much less friends, in over a year. My dimwitted wife thinks the baby is mine. FML
Today, my ex told me that she's 3 weeks pregnant with my child. Not only was she on her period when I broke up with her last week, her friend let me know that the positive pregnancy test she showed me was a fake that she'd bought online. FML
Today, my wife told me she wanted a divorce and walked out. This is two days after she informed me that she is unexpectedly pregnant. FML
Today, I found out that, after a year of separation, my ex-wife is pregnant and due in a few months. The divorce became official a few weeks ago and the father is my former best friend. FML
Today, I found out that I'm pregnant. I buried my 8-year-old son two weeks ago and had my husband serve me divorce papers three days ago. FML
Today, I found out my ex-wife (who I have kids with) is now pregnant with another guy's twin babies. We have only been divorced a couple of months. FML
Today, three weeks after my girlfriend told me she was pregnant, she admitted it was a lie. Turned out it was just a test to see if I'd break up with her or not. I didn't, but I did just break the bank buying all the things we'd need for an actual kid. FML
Today, I called my ex and told him I was pregnant with his child. He was thrilled, going on and on about how much he wanted to be a dad. I had to tell him I was going to abort it. FML
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Top comments
JHPugh 19
Yet her side is probably the one everyone will believe... Such a shame
Wizardo 34
Request a paternity test and oust her, heartless liars don't deserve any leeway.
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Comments (98)
Face344 7
Should be able to sue bitches like that for slander
justanotherday7 7
She's psycho good thing your getting out of the marriage now
ab290 10
i say punch her face in, you already have the blame lol
knuckleheadknock 26
hehehe well what's she going to say to her friends when they can't figure out why the baby doesn't seem to have any of your features....