Today, my parents wouldn't let me go to the fair because they reckon my IQ is so low, I could quite possibly choke on cotton candy and pass out confused by the hall of mirrors. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I tried being the 'cool parent' by taking my kids to a fancy, expensive amusement park, but ended up getting stuck on every ride and getting motion sickness. FML
Today, I took my kids to the circus. We were having fun, right up until the point they saw an old man dressed as a clown, at which point they screamed, grabbed onto my shorts, and managed to accidentally pull them down. FML
Today, my parents decided to go on a diet. This would be perfectly fine if they didn’t insist I go on one too. I weigh less than 90 pounds and am underweight for my height. FML
Today, my parents grounded me and took away my phone, iPod and door. That's right, my door. They think that because I was stumbling and couldn't walk straight last night, I must have been out drinking. They know I suffer from chronic vertigo, but don't believe I was having an attack. FML
Today, my parents have gone from expecting nearly-impossible things to being convinced I can't do basic tasks. Apparently if you're not schizophrenic you can do things that are ridiculous, and if you're schizophrenic you can't do anything. FML
Today, I overheard my parents discussing whether or not they could trust me being alone in the house for 2 days. They then came to the decision that I'm too unpopular and unattractive to ever throw a wild party or get laid. FML
Today, after I recently took our kids to a fair and they both turned out to be scared of clowns, and because the fair was my idea, my wife has told me there will be no sex at all until the kids stop having clown-themed nightmares every night. Two weeks so far and god only knows how long still to go. FML
Today, my boyfriend decided that we should go to the carnival in the Bizarre House place where there were a lot of crazy mirrors. I checked myself out in one of the mirrors. Then my boyfriend says "That will probably be the only time you will ever look that skinny." FML
Today, my 11-year-old son and I took an IQ test for a laugh. To be honest, I've often suspected that I may have some form of mental retardation, but I didn't expect to get a score of 79, while he got one of 114. FML
Today, I went to an amusement park with my family and we all decided to ride the tallest rollercoaster. As soon as the ride got going, I realized I'd made a huge mistake and was too terrified to open my eyes. I spent the entire ride screaming, with my hands over my eyes, and afterwards my cousin called me a wuss. FML
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Top comments
mandywaffles 0
I thought cotton candy melted in your mouth...
Gamakichi 0
Well if you were able to post this, and use standard proper English; you'd probably, at the least, be allowed entry.
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Comments (166)
RiNGObutters 5
That's really bad parenting skills to discourage you like that. :/
MizzErikaHart 8
they reckon..? lol. I reckon you try to get a job there
DimaL 9
Yea sometimes parents can suck :(
MagicGiraffe 12
Depends, are you the same person that couldn't figure out how the car has electricity when the powers out...?
babyfireball77 14
You should remind your parents that your IQ would have to be lower than Paris Hilton's for that to happen. Which is impossible.
poopman777 0
5 bucks says op is a hick.
Fadeity 7
Actually, Paris wouldn't be choking on anything. (;
AaronTkr 0
apple doesn't fall far from the tree.
chuckychan 8
take an iq test and prove them wrong. if you can figure out how
RetardedBullFrog 4
50, I'm pretty sure that the OP got his/her IQ score from an IQ test. Unless there are other means of getting your scores.
chuckychan 8
Op said his/her parents reckoned. So they were guessing her iq I don't know if I make scnsse
kasumirock 13
50 I know where you got that picture from!!!
SirObvious 1
but BUD candy cotten melts in yur mouth! and erry body know that hall o mirrors witch craft anyho!
sematariux 7
27 ftw
mixzies 6
Paris can choke on things. It just wouldn't be cotton candy ':}
PlastikSeraph 2
You might be a redneck if...
RiNGObutters 5
56, the OP doesn't say they have taken one, just that the parents believe they have an incredibly low one for some reason. :I
nmitche95 0
OP said "reckon" maybe their parents r right and they are dumb as a post!
Friaza 29
I hope they were just teasting you OP...
coolbeansbruh 13
And you're a dick.
Gamakichi 0
Well if you were able to post this, and use standard proper English; you'd probably, at the least, be allowed entry.
kings1fan 6
Who says reckon! Haha
gamerhead 3
39- my uncle for some reason...
DoubleRainbows 1
Yes, because cotton candy have been proven to be the no.1 cause for rising death rate.
xmayne 0
yea I don't thing using 'reckon' is helping your case out.
PHall93 0
if you would, ever so nicely, quit using, so many breaks, in your sentences, thatd be nice too.
skylerXx 6
Stupidity runs in the family. no worries bub. :P
baseball6917 8
don't mess around with accents! that's bullshit. yall are just mad the south is better
vegan_muffin 5
This post is infinitely better if you read it in the voice of Stinky from Hey Arnold!
mandywaffles 0
I thought cotton candy melted in your mouth...
sxe_beast 11
That's a lie that has been carefully crafted by the Illuminati.
friscoed 0
Or maybe the OP's IQ is fine but the parents IQ's aren't...
karagarren 8
they're saying that their daughter is so stupid shed choke on it. that's the joke
Soloman212 28
She'll find a way...
SlyTendencies 1
I died laughing at sxe beasts joke. XD
mouxouxou 11
Wow,thanks for clearing that up.
ReptarSwag 4
if you compact alot of cotton candy into a wad then you can choke.
woosah 16
oh is that the joke 37?..
mandywaffles 0
125 - You're oh so very welcome.
SystemofaBlink41 27
37- damn how obvious can you get?
FaguIous 22
Yeah. Maybe the parents are the ones with the low IQ?
kiran_fml 5
You can't choke on cotton candy, it would dissolve. Your parents might need to think a little harder...
i_wuz_nver_here 31
I think it might be the parents we need to worry about...
sourgirl101 29
I've choked on my own spit before. I think everyone has. But I didn't die... yet (:
flockz 20
ive choked on..... well alot of things lets not get into that.
tylersign 11
Exactly what I was thinking. Maybe the parents shouldn't be allowed in the fair..
hellokat1 0
What have you done to make them think you're that dumb?
markymark1429 8
Did OP just say "reckon"?
ByteCarter97 0
that's what I was thinking, 68. I mean, I live in Oklahoma and I've never heard ANYONE say that in a serious matter.
kevint9911 15
She sucks instead of blow?
Sun_Kissed18 25
That could be a funny story, I reckon :P
ovechkinisbeast 9
Fyl for being stupid
KoolKidFly 0
DON'T FEED THE TROLL, IT COULD BITE YOUR FINGERS!!!!
Goodatbeingbad 9
Hey #7, your picture matches your comment.(: Congratulations.(:
ovechkinisbeast 9
Fyl for being stupid
sara_saturday 5
why couldn't they go with you?
ariannaimelda 7
Hey, though it sounds rude, they tell you this because they love you :)
onelastime 0
And they say your IQ is low, cause choking from cotton candy....seriously?
i_wuz_nver_here 31
Maybe it's happened before ;)
IamVexatious 0
maby the were exagerating, or OP is stupid enoght to choke on cotton candy..
HahaNOTFunnyx_x 0
43- I Dont Think Its Possible To Choke On Cotton Candy As It Dissovles In Your Mouth
CryMoreFMLs 15
Thank you 11. I appreciate your politeness in calling me what I embrace. I am a creeper and proud.
raaawwwrrZ 8
It is easy to choke on cottin candy that is why i no longer have an uncle
HomeAl0ne 20
I suspect it has brought up memories of the day the OP was conceived. The noise, the smells, the high blood sugar levels, the unresistable call of the Hall of Mirrors....