Today, my parents were awake while I was still in bed on my iPod touch. I decided to play The Smurfs Village. One of its minigames involves shaking the iPod, so I was breathing heavily. Later, my parents sat me down for a little "talk". FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, after running a couple of miles, I went upstairs into my air-conditioned room to cool off. Apparently, my mom walked past my room and heard me breathing heavily. Later, she had my dad give me a talk about masturbation. FML
Today, I was playing Wii Sports, trying to finally complete the "pick up spares" bowling game. My parents were behind me and said they would support me. After several failed attempts, I realized they had been on their phones the whole time, and were so engrossed that they didn't even look up when I spoke to them. FML
Today, while riding on the car with my family, I put on my headphones and pretended to be listening to music and when my parents talked to me, I pretended I couldn't hear them. They took this opportunity to discuss how fat I was and how I can't hold down a boyfriend. They were laughing as well. FML
Today, I found my son's iPod touch and was looking at a light-saber app. He walked into the living room to see me fighting the cat and making sound effects to myself. FML
Today, I went to the toilet during drama class, not because I had to actually go, but because I wanted to play Monopoly on my iPod. I lost track of time and came back twenty minutes later. My whole class listened while I was forced to tell my teacher I'd been really constipated. FML
Today, I got up at 2 AM to grab a snack. I quietly crept down the stairs, only to find my dad, mom, and a couple of their friends having a secret poker game. Now they think I have a sleepwalking problem. FML
Today, my parents grounded me and took away my phone, iPod and door. That's right, my door. They think that because I was stumbling and couldn't walk straight last night, I must have been out drinking. They know I suffer from chronic vertigo, but don't believe I was having an attack. FML
Today, my mom told me to stop using my phone and talk to them, but whenever I do that, they just end up yelling at me and telling me to go to my room. FML
Today, I woke up early, went to the gym, then came home and showered. When I went into my room to change, my mom woke up and started pounding on my door, screaming about how lazy and useless I was for sleeping so late. When I tried to tell her otherwise, she grounded me for "talking back". FML
Today, my mom complained that I was being too loud, and she smacked my head really hard. All while screaming at me. FML
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Top comments
simonsaysYDI 8
Shaking an iPod makes you breath heavily? Maybe you need to do some more cardio =P
itssosparkly 21
It would have been better if they'd walked in and seen you breathing heavily in bed while looking at Smurfs.
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Comments (130)
simonsaysYDI 8
Shaking an iPod makes you breath heavily? Maybe you need to do some more cardio =P
Ajwc101 24
Are you sure you weren't having a little Fun under the covers OP? Jokes aside. Your life really sucks.
chris71sk8r 8
Maybe he was shaking it fast. A little too fast. O_O
russfml 31
You totally beat me to it lol.
Ajwc101 24
Oops. I meant say Are instead of If.
MatthewDmerrill 5
Did that blue stuff in your mouth come from a smurf? Pol
vanessaizawesome 8
He's a fricken smurf murderer!!! OMG
BrokenDreamer24 15
Angry Birds has the same affect on people. It gets they're blood pumping, hearts racing; So naturally you breath heavy and shake your apple/whatever other touch screen object around like a chronic masterbater.
unknown_user5566 27
55- Same with Fruit Ninja!
simonsaysYDI 8
55 - I must be playing Angry Birds wrong
DespairFaction 11
OP should get a shake weight.
Forlorn420 9
Omg fruit ninja was the shit. Good times
ReesieBanana21 12
How old are you?
mickyb10 13
76- ur comment made my day
peachyFML 17
It's a fun game. A little like the Sims, except with Smurfs.
CheesecakeTaco 3
Lol, a smurf jizzed in 35's mouth. He looks happy about it though
emilyhg 8
Ikr? How can u get tired from shaking an iPod?!?
pandapoof42 3
lol exactly what I was going to say!!
hoedang 3
so this "chat" was about getting more exercise right?
itssosparkly 21
It would have been better if they'd walked in and seen you breathing heavily in bed while looking at Smurfs.
43trauts 14
Considering that the mini-game takes place in Papa Smurfs house, it wouldnt be more fun. It would actually be kinda creepy.
TrueTriage 16
*panting* go papa smurf go!!! (30 seconds later) YES I DID IT!!
IQWasJustLowered 0
or he was under the blankets playing.
PussyPredator 6
13, why would you deface Deadmau5' head like that?
MrBrightside21 20
18 - I laughed so hard to the idea of congratulating yourself after pleasuring yourself. YES I DID IT!!!
AKGirlinSD 20
18, Yay, some one agrees with me that the smurfs are some asexual sexy bitches *enters sarcasm*. Made my day laughing so hard!
JaykeXD 9
What smurfette is hot... XD
simonsaysYDI 8
No, no, it's all about papa smurf.
starwind3438 9
Of Papa Smurf doing Smurfette. Yea, I know, I killed it. I'm ready for the inevitable.
BabySparkle1 15
Only if it's Katy Perry :)
JoeRogansBEARD 15
40 or Lexi belle;)
Forlorn420 9
What the smurf? I'm going to smurfing smurf this thread. Smurf it I'm going home
ScaughtieHolden 11
Only if what's Katy Perry? How does she fall into place here?
gehoy 0
She voiced Smurfette in the latest movie.
ScaughtieHolden 11
Oh disregard my last comment. I would never watch that movie, that's why I didn't know.
aylard 0
If THAT'S what you're into xD
MacintoshXD 0
I love you :'(
aylard 0
What xD
dankpotatoes 2
Those smurfs just get me going(,
william8691 10
Skater chick from florida you're awesome. Nice pic.
dankpotatoes 2
Wow thanks!(:
jenloveslaughs 6
When I read the 1st line I thought it was gunna go to you hearing them having sex...
xxmexx21 0
that happens to me :(
iamsolid 11
......Shaking an iPod should not make you breathe heavily...
onlychildFTW 34
This sounds about right. But maybe while making the motion he got a little to happy.
Skittles_Rawr 8
You need to work out more :/
Ajwc101 24
If you sure you weren't having a little fun under the covers? Jokes aside your life sucks a lot.
pinecone1414 6
Judging by your tongue, you were having some fun with a smurf ;)
aileen15 15
lmfaoooo thts a good one @pinecone1414
birdcagereligion 10
Play the game in front of them and show them what was going on!