Today, my old highschool math teacher called me, asking me to please stop calling him at 2AM every weekend. Turns out my best friend uses my cellphone to call his number every time she's drunk, and declares her eternal love to him. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, my husband gave my cellphone number to his most obnoxious, creepiest friend. I've been drunken-dialed five times already. FML
Today, I've been getting calls for over a week on my home phone, cell phone, and the work phone at my night shift, in which someone whispers terrifying Satanic-sounding chants at me. I've now found out that the caller is my best "friend". His explanation: "You seemed lonely, man." FML
Today my best friend called me at 6 a.m., ranting and accusing me of sleeping with her husband. I live two hours away and haven't seen him in person in over six months. FML
Hello?
Today, my friend's phone rang in class and my teacher thought it was me, so now I have detention for a week. FML
Today, my friend posted my phone number all over the Internet, claiming I was a deranged stalker who prank called her. I was calling from my new number to give it to her. FML
Today, I called one of my old coworkers to see how she was doing. My boyfriend answered the phone. FML
Today, the guy I've been sleeping with for the last three weeks got really drunk. I drove him home from the party and took care of him. At 2am he asked for the phone. When I asked what for, he said he wanted to drunk dial his girlfriend. FML
Leave me alone!
Today, I texted my mom and had to explain to her that calling me repeatedly at 2 a.m. because you're bored and want to talk is not really a good idea. Seriously, nothing happened, she just wanted to chat because she had nothing else to do. Her response to my message? She started calling me again. FML
Today, my "friend" thought it'd be absolutely hilarious to use my phone to text my girlfriend, bragging that I'd found a new "slampiece" and that she's "fukcin dumpd". Now I'm single, her dad keeps making threatening calls to me, and nobody will even listen to my side of the story. FML
A nickname that sticks
Today, I was at my friend's house celebrating his 16th birthday. I couldn't find my phone so I asked my friend's girlfriend if I could borrow her phone to see if I could hear mine ringing. I dialed my number, only to find she had my number saved in her phone as "ASS FACE #3". FML
Top comments
OneandOnlyOne 0
Do NOT let your friend use your phone any more.
misspeg 0
u got a friend who still stays smart enough to use your phone and not hers when she's drunk? props 2 her. I usually don't have a clue when I'm wasted. just keep an eye on your phone from now on. FYL.
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Comments (91)
61apache 0
why do you have your math teachers number anyway?
dpang 0
why would u have ur old math teachers # anyways
rainbowsky 0
uh she did say am idiots and that is just too funny. I will have to remember that one for the next time I get drunk!
Icey_dan1 0
this is a old one...
ArielTheMermaid 17
where do you it's see pm??? it's clearly am!!
RAUN 8
The question isn't why he has his old math teacher's number -- his friend can call any number. The question is why he doesn't have his own phone with him at 2AM so the friend cannot use it to make calls.
Carriah420 9
Both OP and her friend are female. Do you really read as poor as you type?
OliviaNicole 5
Hm
laxforevrr 0
why do you have your high school math teachers cell phone number ?
Carriah420 9
This was so hilarious. Bravo
Carriah420 9
There is a huge difference between alcoholism and drinking in general, you douche canoe.