Today, my husband gave my cellphone number to his most obnoxious, creepiest friend. I've been drunken-dialed five times already. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was so lonely, I wound up talking for two hours to the creep who calls my number every Friday night and makes creepy obscene breathing noises on the other end of the phone. Turns out he's a better listener than my husband. FML
Today, my husband left his phone at home. I looked through his contacts and found a person named "The Bitch." Being very curious, I called "The Bitch" to see who it was. My phone rang. FML
Today, my friend posted my phone number all over the Internet, claiming I was a deranged stalker who prank called her. I was calling from my new number to give it to her. FML
Today, my husband and I switched phones by accident. I've already received several naked pictures from one of his co-workers. FML
Today, when I woke up I checked my phone for messages, only to hear a woman screaming that I have been sleeping with her husband and that she is sending her 'people' after me. I have never met said husband. I panicked for hours, only to receive a call telling me she had dialed the wrong number. FML
Today, I got a call from the guy I have been seeing. I wasn't him. It was his wife wondering why I have her husband's number. FML
Today, I received a text message from my wife, who had gone out for the evening with some girlfriends, saying, "I have to take a friend home, she's drunk! I'll be staying at his place. Call you in the morning." Umm… His? FML
Today, I was talking to a nice guy on a dating app and we exchanged numbers. Later, I got a call. It was his wife asking me to stop talking to her husband. FML
Today, my stalker - an annoying guy who's dedicated the past three years of his life to stalking me at every turn - somehow got a hold of my number and started texting me at 10pm about how I have no life. FML
Today, I was at my friend's house celebrating his 16th birthday. I couldn't find my phone so I asked my friend's girlfriend if I could borrow her phone to see if I could hear mine ringing. I dialed my number, only to find she had my number saved in her phone as "ASS FACE #3". FML
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Top comments
afdude87 6
put his on Craigslist in the male looking for male section and see how he likes people he doesn't know calling him.
Auron93 1
Can't just block the number? Or text him from your husbands phone tellin him to cut that shit out
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Comments (100)
jasoncshooter 7
That really sucks
cbdee 8
Great observation #1! :/
swimchica22 0
Or at least you think he's drunk...O.o
DKParth13 5
Now it's your turn to give his number to someone else ..preferably a gay hotline saying he is interested!
yoursucklives 36
why would your husband give your phonenumber to one of his friends anyway!?
Mean_Mr_Mustard 9
I agree with 39. Put an ad out on craig's list "Male seeking male companionship, no strings attached. Clean with papers, looking for a good time pitching, catching, watching, whatever."
crudeandrudeguy 29
Have sex with his friend and he won't do that again
yeezheng 6
Switch off your handphone ? Change number?
DKParth13 5
First why would change your phone and second he can get your number again!!!
Nosrebor 8
Block his number.
brendazelada 10
Bar the number duhhhh
ulicki 0
Kinky.
hailphire130 0
I don't believe that works in this specific situation, my good chap.
LaughinStock 16
I had to look at this guys pic twice, thought he was Justin Bieber. 4 it's not kinky at all :-/
psycho2012 7
Just block his number
Auron93 1
Can't just block the number? Or text him from your husbands phone tellin him to cut that shit out
afdude87 6
put his on Craigslist in the male looking for male section and see how he likes people he doesn't know calling him.
MadManWithABox 14
WTF husband!? What was wrong with him? Sucks for you, OP, but yeah, like others have said, block the number...or even report him.
cbdee 8
#7 I totally agree! Why would hubby give it??
cptmorgan6 8
What a picture! Bravo my friend, bravo.
cptmorgan6 8
FML is acting up again. My comment was aimed towards 27.
JustOhSoLovely 6
Your profile pic makes your comment seem even angrier #7 lol
dannyboy66 7
Well now you have someone to talk to when your bored :D
Teehee2 0
loool true dat
yadisingh 5
your bored what? ...
muchagente 5
why did he do this? he wants to get rid of you, doesn't he?