Today, my obsession with replying "Your Mom" reached a new level when my anatomy teacher asked what I'd done with my pencil. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my dad had fun embarrassing me as much as possible in my parent-teacher conference by moaning whenever the teacher talked. FML
Today, I asked my science teacher if he'd had my mom when she went to my high school. He took one look at me, glared, and said, "Oh yeah, I remember HER." I have that class every day the rest of the year. Thanks a lot, Mom. FML
Today, I was taking a biology final and was just randomly tapping my pencil. My teacher thought I was somehow communicating with the person next to me, and decided to fail me. FML
Today, I got a call from my daughter's pre-school. Apparently, she is being suspended, for answering; "What do your parents do at home?" She told them, "My parents fuck." FML
Today, I had to pick up my son from school because he was constantly talking about his "Giant pen." In mid-July, I got him a giant-sized pen (writing utensil) and he liked it very much. Apparently, one of the teachers had their mind in the gutter and thought he was talking about… you know what. FML
Today, as a natural science teacher, I was drawing a uterus on the class chalkboard. One of my students started messing around and being noisy, so I shouted, "Be quiet and check out my uterus!" FML
Today, my mom sat on a pencil and started bleeding. She then made me clean the wound on her butt and put ointment on it. FML
Today, my mom went snooping through my art bin to "clean out my old drawings". She found numerous nude pieces and accused me of selling porn. My mom mistook and threw out 57 anatomy practice sketches that I worked very very hard on, and ripped up the remainder of my drawings. FML
Today, I got a note from my son's kindergarten teacher. During free time yesterday, he told her, "Mommy was stripping". I was indeed stripping. Paint that is. FML
Today, I was pestering a co-worker, so she jokingly stated "I'll bury you!" and I replied "I'll bury your mom!". Her moms funeral was last week. FML
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Top comments
Lebeaugars95 20
guess who the teacher called after that comment
SpunkyyyMonkeyy 10
All you had to do was go to class with a pencil. I am sure McDonalds is hiring though.
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Comments (84)
Ilmoran 20
You're really setting yourself up for a pencildick comment there, OP.
Brianna_Ray 23
So your immaturity reached a new level?
mrethan247 14
Wow, that's so old. YDI. >.>
PainOfDemise 11
That's really outdated and not funny anymore. Now it just makes you sound stupid.
Cocoapelli 23
I applaud you OP for posting this YDI story. Those are the stories that take courage to post. Anyone can suffer, some more spectacularly than others, but stories like this make FML great.
aimeroni 12
Haha I remember when saying your mom was the coolest/funniest thing to say.I said that to some kid once and his mom was actually dead..
CupOfCoffee 14
Ha, that must have sucked. Thanks for the giggles, though.
Ki11erC 18
Are we back in the 90's?
worldclassrager 41
Please don't to go swag or YOLO... Time to find a new phrase bro
gbrodee1 5
slow clap