Today, my mother told me that the carbon-monoxide alarm went off last night, but since she didn't smell any gas, she decided to just remove the batteries and go back to bed. I had to explain to her that you can't smell carbon monoxide, and that we could have died in our sleep. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, our carbon monoxide detector started beeping. My mom started freaking out and made me go stand outside so I "don't die". I stood outside for 20 minutes, it was raining and it turned out that the detector was just low on battery. FML
Today, I was home alone when I heard the carbon-monoxide detector beeping. Panicking, I grabbed my dog, ran out of my house as fast as I could, and waited outside for 3 hours for my mom to get home. Turned out the detector was just out of batteries. FML
Today, I thought I had carbon monoxide poisoning because I had the symptoms and my detector was going off. I called the fire dept, they checked me, they checked my apartment. My apartment is fine; I'm just out of shape, have high blood pressure, and don't know how to work simple electronics. FML
Today, my mom got a new furnace put in because they found out the old one was leaking carbon monoxide. This is six months after I got kicked out because I was sleeping too much, so my mom thought I was using drugs. FML
Today, at 2:47 am, my mom woke me up in a panic screaming about smelling gas and the house blowing up. Twenty minutes, two fire trucks, and a traumatized dog later, it was just the neighbors burning their mail. FML
Today, in my sleep I let out a couple of farts. Normally this wouldn't be a big deal, but on this night I had slept in my mom's room. She came to check in on me and violently woke me up because she thought I pooped in the bed. Now my entire family knows I fart in my sleep. FML
Today, I was making dinner when my smoke alarm started going off. I opened all the windows and waved a towel underneath it. After ten minutes, I realized the alarm wasn't reacting to the food. Its battery was dying. FML
Today, my smoke alarm went off. In a frenzy, I called 9-1-1 and exited my house. Several minutes later a fire truck showed up. After investigating, one of the firemen informed me I needed to change the batteries in my smoke alarm. FML
Today, I was cooking something I knew would make a lot of smoke, so I asked my teenage daughter to tape a bag over the smoke detector. She said she did, so I cooked; the alarm went off and firemen came. She hadn't taped over the smoke detector, she'd taped it over the doorbell. FML
Today, there was a gas leak at work. We called the fire department, who advised us to evacuate the building. We called our manager to let her know, and her response was "Oh, don’t do that." My boss would rather let us die of carbon monoxide exposure than lose out on 3 hours of work. FML
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Top comments
water4life 0
she needs to be slapped
CleanSheets 0
Your mom clearly knew you couldn't smell it, but was just looking for a way to end your life while she made her get away in the emergancy ecsape pod that she secretly had installed into her closet several years ago.
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Comments (174)
princessjane96 0
well if they died it wouldn't have been an fml cuz they wouldn't have a life!
princessjane96 0
well if they would have died it wouldn't be an fml because there wouldn't be the life part
saranottelling 7
OP, I'm amazed you've lived this long...
blland 0
stay alert! carbon dioxide poisoning can take up to 3-7 days to kill you.
saranottelling 7
carbon dioxide? What we exhale? WE'RE ALL GUNNA DIE!!!!!!
polico_wolf 0
carbon MONOXIDE not carbon dioxide
derschadenfreude 5
CO= Carbon Monoxide, the poisonous gas CO2= Carbon Dioxide, what we exhale it's an easy mistake to make.
Fabby_fml 2
Carbon dioxide is actually a serious problem, kind of like dihydrogen monoxide.
nikki908 3
It's Carbon Monoxide, Idiot. There's a difference... I hate this part right here... I just can't take your tears..
fatfatgoeshome 8
Whenever I consume dihydrogen monoxide, I feel like I'm a rebel who is breaking all of the rules.
Rhien 0
Once, I accidentally drank some dihydrogen monoxide
scarletpenguin 16
@saranottelling, I don't think you know your Chemistry too well. Go back to school and learn the difference between Carbon Monoxide and Carbon Dioxide.
null_fml 11
@scarletpenguin, I don't think you know your comment thread structures too well. Go back to read and learn the difference between blland and saranottelling.
cuntfused 3
dihydrogen monoxide is water.
morella_xx 29
Really? Thanks for clearing that up. I don't think any of the people talking about it were aware. Good thing you're here!
ZeroMachine 3
Move out. Now.
luckyducky123 0
Finally, a real FML. Well.. at least one that you can't say YDI. That sucks, really. Your mom isn't too bright. Glad nothing horrible, like dying, happened. FYL.
dave6000 0
your mom is a dumb bitch
anorexicbarbie 8
how is she a bitch? I can understand her being dumb, but not a bitch. you're an idiot.
saranottelling 7
The OP's mom is a dog? How the hell did a dog take the batteries out of a Carbon-Monoxide alarm?
newsgit 0
...they are evolving and now have opposable thumbs. And sharp teeth. Oh god, we are ******.
saranottelling 7
#99 You're a genius! I didn't think of that! The chimp's will kill us first though. They already found out how to sharpen sticks and some rocks. (Look it up online, it's true.) Planet of the Apes... I can't wait!
null_fml 11
Am I the only one wondering how the OP slept through a carbon monoxide alarm (or heard it but didn't do anything about it for some reason)?
Sun_Kissed18 25
Some people are just heavy sleepers. Or the alarm was closer to her mom's bedroom than her own
saranottelling 7
I slept though the fire alarm once and it's right outside my room. Thankfully, there was no fire.
Baal952 0
"Today, I found out that me and my daughter could have died in our sleep. How? I was up late working the corners and wanted to get some sleep but the carbon monoxide alarm kept going off, so I took out the batteries. FML."
Shadic 0
"Today, I was a goddamned moron. FML."
Baal952 0
Yea that would work too.
iEmily 0
wow. I'm glad you didn't die but move out asap!