Today, my mother told me that the carbon-monoxide alarm went off last night, but since she didn't smell any gas, she decided to just remove the batteries and go back to bed. I had to explain to her that you can't smell carbon monoxide, and that we could have died in our sleep. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, our carbon monoxide detector started beeping. My mom started freaking out and made me go stand outside so I "don't die". I stood outside for 20 minutes, it was raining and it turned out that the detector was just low on battery. FML
Today, I was home alone when I heard the carbon-monoxide detector beeping. Panicking, I grabbed my dog, ran out of my house as fast as I could, and waited outside for 3 hours for my mom to get home. Turned out the detector was just out of batteries. FML
Emergency
Today, I thought I had carbon monoxide poisoning because I had the symptoms and my detector was going off. I called the fire dept, they checked me, they checked my apartment. My apartment is fine; I'm just out of shape, have high blood pressure, and don't know how to work simple electronics. FML
Close shave
Today, my mom got a new furnace put in because they found out the old one was leaking carbon monoxide. This is six months after I got kicked out because I was sleeping too much, so my mom thought I was using drugs. FML
Today, at 2:47 am, my mom woke me up in a panic screaming about smelling gas and the house blowing up. Twenty minutes, two fire trucks, and a traumatized dog later, it was just the neighbors burning their mail. FML
Today, in my sleep I let out a couple of farts. Normally this wouldn't be a big deal, but on this night I had slept in my mom's room. She came to check in on me and violently woke me up because she thought I pooped in the bed. Now my entire family knows I fart in my sleep. FML
Classic annoyance
Today, I was making dinner when my smoke alarm started going off. I opened all the windows and waved a towel underneath it. After ten minutes, I realized the alarm wasn't reacting to the food. Its battery was dying. FML
Today, my smoke alarm went off. In a frenzy, I called 9-1-1 and exited my house. Several minutes later a fire truck showed up. After investigating, one of the firemen informed me I needed to change the batteries in my smoke alarm. FML
Today, I was cooking something I knew would make a lot of smoke, so I asked my teenage daughter to tape a bag over the smoke detector. She said she did, so I cooked; the alarm went off and firemen came. She hadn't taped over the smoke detector, she'd taped it over the doorbell. FML
Seize the means of production!
Today, there was a gas leak at work. We called the fire department, who advised us to evacuate the building. We called our manager to let her know, and her response was "Oh, don’t do that." My boss would rather let us die of carbon monoxide exposure than lose out on 3 hours of work. FML
Top comments
water4life 0
she needs to be slapped
CleanSheets 0
Your mom clearly knew you couldn't smell it, but was just looking for a way to end your life while she made her get away in the emergancy ecsape pod that she secretly had installed into her closet several years ago.
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Comments (174)
perdix 31
You ought to Dutch Oven the bee-yotch to teach her a lesson about noxious gases!
KurouTenshi 0
xD this one wins, perdix. (ignoring the fact that you can't smell the monoxide but yknow!) LOL
jujie001 3
win!!!!
dramatic11 0
My god, I understand where you're coming from. Last January an ice storm swept through my state. I was stuck living with my parents. I had to beg my mom to open a window a little because we were basically living around a heater that produced a lot of carbon monoxide... *facepalm*
Batman4890 0
it doesn't matter how much your heater produces its how much of it gets out your an idiot... plus thats wasting energy
Darksect0r13 0
@#73 you're*
CleanSheets 0
womp womp womp
Kockdiesel 0
your mom's a dumb bitch.
anorexicbarbie 8
and you're an idiot
SephoraSocialite 0
Glad you guys didn't have a leak enough to kill. big FML that you are stuck with a mom that is stupid enough to not even be cautious and pulled out the detector.
SettoFail 9
Your mom is a ******* moron and I'm sorry for that, I suggest moving out before she does something else life threatning. But atleast you didn't die. :)
heartlessagony 0
Your mom is stupid OP. At least you didn't die ;D Well now let the bone marrow produce more red blood cells and replace the ones with damaged hemoglobins.
wazdog 4
Who sleeps at risk of carbon monoxide poisoning anyway?
thekingjoe90 0
you can't fix stupid
brandothemando 0
that sucks, u didn't die tho
psyco5000 0
is ur mom married to her brother??