Today, my mother said she trusted me enough to go with me for my first drive in my new car. As soon as we got in the car, she started hyperventilating and screaming we're going to crash. I didn't even start the engine. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went driving for the first time with my mom. When she wasn't screaming, she gave great advice like, "Stop at the red light" and "Don't crash into cars". I need to drive 50 hours with her. FML
Today, while driving on the streets for the first time, my mom decided that it would be an appropriate time to yell at me for every single mistake I’ve ever made in my life. This stressed me out so much I began driving against traffic. FML
Today, and for all my life, my dad has been feral about protecting his BMW; we weren’t even allowed to look at it. Well today he decided I was allowed to drive it as an 18th birthday present. I was so nervous, I hyperventilated and passed out in the seat before I even put the key in the ignition. FML
Today, my dad trusted me to go driving by myself in his car. I foolishly celebrated by doing a jump heel click, landed awkwardly, threw my hand out to stop myself falling, and scraped the whole bunch of keys down the driver's door. He trusted me for like 3 seconds and I blew it. FML
Today, while riding in the car with my mother, we got into an argument, at which point she pulled the vehicle over, took the key out of the ignition and used it to turn off the passenger airbag. She then continued driving in silence. FML
Today, I decided to drive my mothers Bentley. She is out of town and told me not to go near the car. Being 17, I didn't listen. As I was backing out the driveway, I was hit by an SUV, seriously damaging my moms car. Who was driving the SUV? My mom, coming home early. FML
Today, my mom offered to drive us into the city after Christmas. I told her months ago that I wasn't getting in a car she was driving, because I don't trust her not to secretly drink and drive. I guess she either forgot or didn't think I meant it. Now I have to tell her again, two days before flying down there. FML
Today, I just bought a car with all of my own money. Then, when I brought it home my dad informed me that my mom will be driving it to work every day. FML
Today, I got my first driving lesson from my dad. We traded seats, I started the car and his entire lesson was, "Go." FML
Today, I bought my very first car. My dad insisted on driving it, just to see how it handles, and drove it right off the bridge near our house into our river because he hasn’t driven anything in 15 years, which also means he has no insurance, at all. FML
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Top comments
lol69_fml 0
This is when you tell her to calm down and everything will be fine and then peel out and slam the brakes and tell her thats what you learned in need for speed
nitro27x 2
My mom did that when I got my learner's permit.
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Comments (72)
that_guy321 2
ohh the joys of driving...
nitro27x 2
My mom did that when I got my learner's permit.
Daaniellee1234 8
My mom said shes not going to get into the car with me. Ever. She still wont get in the car with my 21 year old brother behind the wheel..
lol69_fml 0
This is when you tell her to calm down and everything will be fine and then peel out and slam the brakes and tell her thats what you learned in need for speed
tinkchic4life 0
ok then she will have a heart attack but still hilarious
lahp 0
i drove my mum to doctors once.. she kept telling me to slow down... i was doing 15 miles an hour
gameoverman_fml 0
You drive me crazy, oooh oooh! ...Miscellaneous 80's music reference. Because I can.
Rhaegar 0
Let's see... it was your first drive in YOUR new car. And the FML here is that your mom is worried? You sound like a spoiled brat who doesn't have any actual issues, and so you complain about nothing instead. Let me guess, your parents paid for the car?
scateice 0
Let me guess, your a stupid bitch?
lahp 0
yes! :D to #11
Rhaegar 0
I am neither stupid nor bitchy. I can also spell contractions properly; I suggest you do the same.
Jesta05 0
ummmm slight contradiction between 1st line and the 2
StrickenNerve 0
YDI, since women can't drive.
AKBIGCAL 0
You should have started turnin da wheel back and forth and screamed were gunna crash! Haha
OhhxGoshhxAri 0
I was actually under the impression from reading that, that she was only kidding. If my mom did that to me, I know for a fact that she would be kidding. My grandma... not so much. :D