Today, my mother decided to inform me that she doesn't believe canned food can have an expiry date and that the food is still okay to eat years after the 'supposed' expiry date. She's probably been cooking my dinner with expired food for over 17 years. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I opened up a can of tomato soup I'd taken from my parents' house recently. After eating the whole can, I started feeling a little off, so I checked the expiration date. It expired 12 years ago. FML
Today, I threw out all the food in the freezer that my mom had been keeping since 2013. When she found out, she said, "frozen food doesn't go bad." FML
Today, I saw my mom changing the expiry date on milk. She genuinely thought this would make the milk sour later. FML
Today, I cleaned out the fridge for my mother. I didn't throw out a single thing that was less than a month past its expiration. Instead of thanks, she complained about everything that I threw away being still good, including a tub of butter that had been expired for two years. FML
Today, I found out that my boyfriend's mom doesn't believe you can get food poisoning from food that is cooked. She gave us food that had sat out all day/night and then got angry when I said we could get sick. FML
Today, a friend invited me over for dinner. She presented me with a "gourmet" homemade meal. As I started eating, I realized it tasted… off. She looked at me expectantly, so I politely ate it all. Afterwards, she told me it was a new recipe she was trying "tuna casserole" made with canned tuna… which we found out later expired in 2015. FML
Today, while tidying up my grandmother's fridge, I got to play expiration-date-bingo. The winner was some type of concentrated apple sauce supposed to be used for salad dressings. It expired in 1986. FML
Today, surprisingly, my roommate made a nice meal. Within an hour, I started throwing up. When I confronted her, she confessed that she'd used long expired ingredients, including meat, because she didn't want the garbage men to think she's "the type that wastes food." FML
Today, while my mom was out, my family agreed upon the assumption that she has a "shopping problem." I argued against it for quite a while, until she pulled up minutes later with a what seemed like a life-time supply of canned condensed milk. FML
Today, I'm worried my mother might have the early onset of senility. She started making gumbo, only to lose the plot halfway through, and then began throwing in the ingredients for chili. The result was an inedible mess, and she insisted we've had this for years. Then she tasted it, and yelled, "What the hell is this?" FML
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Top comments
adrianh1090 12
You've made it this far.
Welshite 40
Canned food is good for a long time after the expiration date. Just sayin'. Manufactures print the "best by" date, but that doesn't mean it's spoiled even months later.
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Comments (126)
Exhaling 12
This made me cringe as I read this. Op, cook your own food if you don't trust your mom that much anymore.
LowExpectations 30
OP would need to get a job as well and do their own grocery shopping. No point cooking for yourself if all your supplies are expired.
zevo1415 10
Canned food is good after the "best by" daye
xkore787 14
Haha imagine a dyslexic chef....that could end poorly *Breaking News!* Thirteen contract food poisoning after chef uses cocktail sauce from 1902! Three confirmed fatalities
doodlecloud 27
Hahaha - 'Learning difficulty ruins mans job prospects forever!' Hilarious...
NoFightinDestiny 9
Wow, that's........ uncanny. Hah
iAlissa 34
*slaps knee*
Retrokitty 9
They tend to make a best by date now instead of an expropriation date. The truth is canned food is usually good for at least 1/3 of the shelf life if not longer. Companies do it for two reasons: 1. So you buy more 2. So they don't get people complaining if expired food before the due date.
kiraleann 16
Most canned foods have a "best by" shelf life of at least a couple of years, I don't see why it wouldn't continue to be safe to eat after that provided it isn't TOO much after that. I wouldn't eat canned food that was years past the best by date. But months? Sure.
kiraleann 16
Sorry, just noticed my reply is in the wrong spot. I clicked the reply button for #28 and it ended up here. :/
harryb1963 3
The best by date is an FDA regulation. I work in a bottle water plant and it is required.
eragon2262 6
but did you die?
Azalorgm 7
Sounds like you can't really convince her. Sorry OP!
vauran 5
Google expiration date myth. Lots of interesting stuff to read. Expiration dates aren't always accurate or even relevant.
drewflav 17
The day I see an expiration date on honey is the day I know the system is ****** up. Oh wait...
vipirius 18
Yeah but the stuff they sell at markets can hardly be called honey, so it makes sense that it has an experation date, with all the stuff they add into it.
somuchfeels 11
Might wanna get checked out for like, mega-super hepatitis.
JanisEvans 10
Wow, you're dumb.
Hiimhaileypotter 53
Hepatitis? From canned foods? Am I missing something, or does that word just not mean what you think it means?
somuchfeels 11
I was being facetious Captain literalism.
Aeternal 6
You still live. Go order some chinese