Today, my mother came over to visit, and my kids started excitedly telling her Christmas is coming soon. She freaked out, saying Christmas is a "Satanic holiday" and telling them that Santa is going to hell along with everyone who celebrates it. My children are now traumatized. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I took my kids to the mall to see Santa. While waiting in line, my eldest got bored and loudly complained, "I don't know why we're here. Santa's not even real." I don't think any of the kids within a hundred feet took the news very well. FML
Today, my 16 year-old son had a tantrum over me asking him to clean up his room, and decided to tell my 6 year-old daughter that Santa isn't real, and that it was me who bought her presents. My daughter is inconsolable. FML
Today, I came home to find my parents wearing Santa hats and blasting Christmas music at full volume. So begins three months of hell. FML
Today, it's that time of year again: my mom has threatened to disown me if I celebrate Christmas in any way, shape, or form. Yes, she is an extreme bible thumper. No, she doesn't see what is wrong with her behavior, nor does she care. FML
Today, on the bus, when I was asking my 6-year-old son what he wanted for Christmas, a stranger came up to us and yelled at him about how Santa Claus is not real, that his "parents are fucking liars" and that he should "never listen to anything one of those fuckers says." FML
Today, my mom mentioned that she doesn’t think she’s gonna let my baby sister believe in Santa. When I mentioned that I believed in Santa growing up, she casually replied with, "Yeah, well you were slow." FML
Today, my mom visited, and I left her for a few minutes while I used the bathroom. While I was stuck taking a crap, she went on one of her religious rants, telling my children that Easter was off this year because their precious "pagan" Easter Bunny had been murdered. FML
Today, my fifteen year-old son decided to tell his little five year-old sister that Santa isn't real. She now refuses to talk to any of us and thinks "her whole life is a lie". FML
Today, my grandma came over for the holidays. She tried explaining how Santa is actually Christ reincarnated, giving presents to all the good little Christian boys and girls. She'll be staying all week. FML
Today, my 8-year-old daughter was throwing a tantrum, and I said "Keep this up and I'll tell Santa to take your presents back." She told me I don't even know Santa, at which point I accidentally blurted that I'm "Santa". FML
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Top comments
yoimtrollin 24
Ho ho ho hail satan ************
Nyx_fml 23
Wait... Santa is going to hell? So, she thinks Santa is real? There's the first sign she's a wacko. Uhh... I mean... SANTA IS REAL, FML KIDS.
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Comments (167)
catharsis5 9
By any chance did your mother confuse Christmas and Halloween? Halloween is closer than Christmas when you posted this...
YourVoiceofReasn 6
She probably just wanted them to stop talking about it. I mean, for ****'s sake, it's not even Halloween yet!
ShenaniganNinja 20
She might be aware that Christmas is originally based on the Roman holiday Saturnalia, and originally had nothing to do with Jesus. Saturnalia was a celebration of Saturn, the Roman god of agriculture. Which of course would be viewed as Satan by Christians.
evolute72113 9
Your mother is going to cuz god luvs all including Santa and for her to say that means she is not following what she preaches
bgdkmcgee 10
Sounds like she skipped her meds.
IMSUPEREPIC 5
What a major **** I'm sorry she might be a nice person but jeez how old were your kids like 5-10 telling them that santos going to hell is a major **** move sorry but MAJOR **** ALERT
Arlisshsr 9
its saturnalia...get educated...
hynriech_lord 8
Wh..... what......why just why?
XxF_MY_LIFExX 12
Why would your mother do that? She's scarred her grandchildren and Christmas is the most religious holiday besides Easter.
LordCharco_iii 0
I think, I THINK, that your mother is a Puritan.