Today, my mom wanted me to pick up my cousin from work immediately. I'm in my shirt and underwear with no other clothes and I'm also too young to drive. She said "He won't mind, and just take my drivers license, they'll never know!" FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, my boyfriend asked me to go to a car show. I told him to hold on, I had to ask my mom. I quietly asked her to say no for me. She said "Sure!". FML
Mom of the year
Today, my car’s at the mechanic's so I called my mom and asked her to come pick me up from class, since it ends at 9pm and I was scared to walk home at night. She told me, “Oh honey, you have nothing to worry about, you’re too fat to get raped, plus you need the exercise.” FML
Today, I drove my cousin to her wedding. The photographer said I was too ugly for the official photos so they searched the crowd for a good looking guy to pose as the driver in my new car. No one in the crowd stopped to defend me. My mom told me it's my own fault. FML
Today, while my mom was out, I took the car out to CVS to get some food, even though I'm not legally allowed to drive. As soon as I got back in the car, my mom pulled up 2 parking spaces away from me. She didn't notice me bend down to hide... until I accidentally hit the horn in the process. FML
Today, my dad came to pick me up. It would have been nicer if he'd had his clothes on. FML
Today, I took my road test. I'd never had driver's training and my mom taught me how to drive. I failed the test so badly, and when I got home my mom admitted to having taught me how to drive completely wrong because she didn't want me to get my license as she thinks I'm too young. I'm 18. FML
Today, I was talking to my boyfriend on the way to meet him. While chatting, I told him that I had a rip in my favorite jeans. When he sympathetically apologized, I said "It's okay, you're just going to take them off in a minute, anyway." I forgot my mom was in the car. FML
Today, due to bad weather, my dad let me take his car to drive to my apartment 3 hours away. I only realized when I got there that my keys were still sitting on my parents' kitchen counter. FML
Put those away
Today, I had to close my eyes in shame and pretend I didn't exist, as my mom gave a cop a good look at her wrinkled, prune-like cleavage and tried to convince him that the speed limit is optional. FML
Today, my mom decided to have a get together at my house while I was at work. When I came home, she pulled me aside and asked me to pretend to be her maid. FML
Top comments
StagGT 13
With that attitude, her license is probably expired, too
OnReceivingEnd 18
"My cousin just might be there forever." (goes to bed)
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Comments (16)
OnReceivingEnd 18
"My cousin just might be there forever." (goes to bed)
StagGT 13
With that attitude, her license is probably expired, too
RichardPencil 32
That’s old school driver’s ed! None of this namby-pamby crap of cars that are controlled by instructors on closed courses. No, sir! You get out there on the real road and if you get killed, that’s the real failure on the driver’s test!
pscool 11
Tell her to order an Uber for him.
Glowworm56 27
This would make a great movie: I was an Underaged Driver in my Underwear for my Cousin.
Ilmoran 20
You forgot unlicensed.
Josh Thiele 10
I mean, seeing my cousin in his Underwear isnt uncommon... less so now but when we were younger that was always the case
Zekfen 17
You live in the hills of West Virginia? That’s one of the few places I can think of that somebody would want to see their cousin in their underwear.
Chazzster 32
OP should be able to put on pants or a dress quickly. That’s not a big deal Being encouraged or told to drive without a license, on the other hand is stupid and irresponsible of OP’s mom.
Sinshine 28
Wait you don't have any clothes other than panties and a shirt? What happened to the rest of your clothes?
Red Swingle 5
probably being cleaned. I do all my laundry and only wear a top and panties at home when not expecting to do errands
weaboo 12
Yeah but did you have any training because if you’re mid way through getting a license then you’d know what you’re doing
raven_of_azarath 35
Whether they’re training or not, it’s still illegal for them to drive alone.
1gullible_bugger 34
Tell her to jump in a lake and dive herself.