Today, my mom walks into my room, with a serious look on her face asks me "When a man is getting it from behind, the man on top orgasms, but what happens to the man on bottom? Do you think he takes care of himself or what?" Hand motions were included. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I had sex with this guy who I like very much. As he went to leave, I decided to give him one last thrill. I reached down his pants and started to rub and stroke him. He abruptly pulled my hand out. When I asked why, he pointed behind me. My mom had watched the whole thing. FML
Today, I was talking to my mom. During the conversation she asked me, "Does he take his leg off when you guys are having sex?" Referring to the guy I've been seeing who has a prosthetic leg. My dad then asked, "Does he spank you with it too if you've been naughty?" FML
Today, my mom asked me for advice on how to give a good blow job. I'm a guy. FML
Today, my mom walked in on me masturbating. She didnt look away and we stared at each other for a while; then she asked me what I wanted from McDonalds. FML
Today, I walked in on my mom giving my dad head. Acting like I hadn't seen anything, I asked if I could use a towel sitting on the dresser. My mom said, "No, we're going to need that one." FML
Today, after receiving a lovely massage from my boyfriend, I was lying topless in bed beside him. Just as I was thinking this would be the perfect opportunity for some intimacy, he looks at me and says, "My mom is SO awesome." FML
Today, my girlfriend was giving me a handjob in the shower. As I was reaching climax, my mom walked by the bathroom door and started talking to me. My girlfriend didn't stop, and in order to distract from the situation at hand, I had to carry on the conversation with my mom. FML
Today, I discovered that the reason my mom hasn't been noticing the extra cleaning I've done lately is because her boyfriend took credit when she asked about it; and was rewarded for it in bed. I helped him get with my mom. FML
Today, I walked in on my mother rubbing one out. For the third time. I then had to explain to her, also for the third time, why pleasuring herself in the living room is inappropriate. FML
Today, my mom tried to give me the sex talk, while I was mounting my boyfriend. FML
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Top comments
log1k 3
what... the ****?
ohmygawdz 0
FYL because your mom thought you would know that.
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Comments (263)
log1k 3
what... the ****?
ZleveL 0
nononononono no no no. it's like this : what. the. ****.
pgcheerleader 1
bahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!¡¡¡¡
nickernutz 0
did you tell her the man on the bottom waits till he gets into the bathroom before he farts?
firey994 0
what the ****
MissMel_xo 0
so sick and wrong.... reach around technique would be used there though.
hobojo11 0
the reach around
Iamnotmyself 17
Reach around, taking care of yourself, and sometimes you get lucky and it rubs your prostate the right way.
ohmygawdz 0
FYL because your mom thought you would know that.
someguy945 0
It seems like the polite thing to do would be for the top to "reach around" and take care of the bottom. They could even give this an easy-to-remember name like "reacharound".
Crimso 0
mum shoulda asked you
daniisme 0
and you know this... how?
Kadaver 1
because he is knowledgable?
reneetlovesyou 30
Well they actually said "seems like," which implies they don't actually know from experience, but are speculating.
BenignScientists 0
Men can climax from prostate stimulation. The more you know *
Gruv3r14 1
Prostate milking.
Tika876 18
Um awkward, was she expecting you to respond? If so, seriously fyl
maxson_fml 0
#3 wins
Fredzter 0
Whyyyyy would she say that to you? o.O And did that just come out of the blue?
gaby904 0
random much???
kirby229 0
are you gay? or is there absolutely no reason that you would know this? and men can have anal orgasms =P
keven501 12
OPs a woman how would she be guy with men?
log1k 3
to add to #4.. a guys gspot is in the anus :x ... wtf eh? lol
yummcookie 0
Yeah how unlucky are we -_-
EvilCupcake8361 9
does this mean guys can climax while pooping???