Today, my mom and dad were arguing. It started getting really heated, so I tried to go break it up. But within a couple of minutes, my mom wanted to make a statement by throwing a plate to the ground, forgetting I was beside her. I now have a throbbing foot with shards of glass in it. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was wearing flip flops whilst putting out the trash, and was careful not to step near the broken glass surrounding the trash cans. My mother ran up to me hysterically warning me about the glass, which startled me and caused me to step on a shard, slicing my foot open. FML
Today, my mom bumped into a table with a glass vase on it. Seeing that the vase was about to fall, I lunged to catch it. Before I got there, the vase fell and shattered, resulting in me diving into the broken shards. FML
Today, my mom said my name and startled me so badly, I jumped and dropped the glass I was holding. She still isn’t speaking to me for breaking her favorite glass. FML
Today, I fell down the stairs while holding some dirty glasses from my room. I ended up pulling pieces of glass from my body. Meanwhile all my mom cares about is the fact that I broke three of her favorite glasses. FML
Today, I was washing the dishes when I gave myself a nasty gash on my leg from the open dishwasher door. After five minutes of cleaning up the blood and wrapping it up, I came back to finish the job only to drop a plate and send broken shards into my foot. FML
Today, I broke my toe and screamed, "Fuck!" My mom heard and yelled at me for swearing, while I laid on the floor in pain. FML
Today, my mom got blackout drunk and tried to fight me, my stepdad, and my brother, resulting in my stepdad leaving, my brother getting two holes from a metal shelf my mom tried to joust him with, and I got bit. FML
Today, I accidentally broke one of my mom’s favorite glasses while she was away. My dad saw and offered to tell her instead that he broke it, because, "let’s face it, if she knew it was you, she’d shove the glass shards down your fucking throat." FML
Today, whilst babysitting, I broke a glass. I explained to the kid that it was very important not to walk barefoot around where it had happened, because of the tiny bits of glass. He jumped back, scared, and while doing so tripped. I rushed to help him and ran through the broken glass. Barefoot. FML
Today, I washed the dishes for my mom while she was out, as they seemed to be piling up. I accidentally sliced my hand with a knife in the process. After a trip to the hospital, it was revealed she'd been leaving those dishes there "to teach dad a lesson." FML
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Top comments
pleasetryagain 0
She wasn't making a statement. She was being an irrational idiot.
fmlfmlfml15 0
ouch...FYL Lesson learned: NEVER intervene when your parents are fighting!!
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Comments (101)
iGreen_Day 0
Ehehehehehe!!! I love it when 'statements' backfire! Favourited *
bornkiller66 0
and that is why you never walk barefoot unless you're in the shower!!! but still FYL... my mom poured boiling water over my hand when she was arguing with my dad!!!! I saw my bone dude!! u should be happy!!!!
TobyLuckhurst 0
...why would someone have a plate made of glass? Still, FYL, good luck with your parents...
cookydough28 0
most plates are made of glass...besides the plactic baby plates you must use...
mike1921 0
Really? I only have 10 glass plates in my house, or shatterable plates (I'm 14, I don't know shit about whether ceramic plates are glass :| ) and almost all of my plates are paper
mattmag 0
This is why you stay out of the way and don't interfere. Would you want your mom trying to stop you and your girlfriend from arguing?
omgwhatanfml 0
lol thats one way to stop the argument? woulda gonna like this "can one of you guys stop arguing and drive me to the emergency room? if they said no, thats 2 fml's for the price of 1 lol
Soup_fml 0
Ah, this brings back fond memories of growing up with my older brother and sister. Exploding pans of macaroni flying through the kitchen, screaming matches at 3 AM, and threatening each other with axes. Parents though, my Dad was more likely to do things like smashing a croquet mallet on the ground until it broke because he was losing, or yelling at me after accidentally bashing me in the head with one. You just can't put a price on those treasured family memories.
mike1921 0
o_O . Wow...your parents are more ****** up then my mom....a little.
panthersrule95 0
Dude, you should have stayed out of it.
Darenator 0
you guys should stop passing judgement and telling him he should have stayed out of it.
Finnboghi 0
FML was meh. That comment was pure win.
p00p0ster0us 0
Your mom is an idiot. Hysterical people are 4th from the bottom on my list. I absolutely cannot stand anyone who is willing to smash a plate to say "I'M REALLY ANGRY". That's something that even CHILDREN don't do.
airplanefood 0
I agree but you can't compare them to children. Kids whine about things like not getting ice cream - parents whine about serious life ******* problems like money. My parents are divorced and I think their heated arguments were warranted. Maybe breaking a plate is better than hurting someone physically.