Today, I accidentally broke one of my mom’s favorite glasses while she was away. My dad saw and offered to tell her instead that he broke it, because, "let’s face it, if she knew it was you, she’d shove the glass shards down your fucking throat." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mom said my name and startled me so badly, I jumped and dropped the glass I was holding. She still isn’t speaking to me for breaking her favorite glass. FML
Today, I fell down the stairs while holding some dirty glasses from my room. I ended up pulling pieces of glass from my body. Meanwhile all my mom cares about is the fact that I broke three of her favorite glasses. FML
Today, my mom bumped into a table with a glass vase on it. Seeing that the vase was about to fall, I lunged to catch it. Before I got there, the vase fell and shattered, resulting in me diving into the broken shards. FML
Today, my mom and dad were arguing. It started getting really heated, so I tried to go break it up. But within a couple of minutes, my mom wanted to make a statement by throwing a plate to the ground, forgetting I was beside her. I now have a throbbing foot with shards of glass in it. FML
Today, I washed the dishes for my mom while she was out, as they seemed to be piling up. I accidentally sliced my hand with a knife in the process. After a trip to the hospital, it was revealed she'd been leaving those dishes there "to teach dad a lesson." FML
Today, I walked into the kitchen and accidentally broke my mother's vase. I said, "Accidents happen." She replied, "Yeah, like your birth." FML
Today, I accidentally crashed my mom's car into my dad's car. FML
Today, my father-in-law asked why my wife had a black eye. I got as far as, “Yeah that was me, I…” before he broke my nose. I get the 'protecting his daughter' thing, but if he’d let me finish, I’d have said “was putting up a shelf she wanted, but I dropped it on her. Total accident.” FML
Today, I threw a party at my girlfriend's house before her parents came home from vacation. After the party, I found all of her mom's favorite wine glasses broken. I spent $500 on new glasses, and wrote a huge apology for the party and the damage. She got home and told me that they were already broken. FML
Today, I complained to my mom about her always acting cold towards me, and that it feels like she doesn’t love me anymore. Her response was, “You’re damn right I don’t, not since you broke my favorite glass last year.” She used to tell me she’d always love me no matter what. FML
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Top comments
cuz803 46
Sucks your mom is like that apparently. Your dad is also a hero for taking one for the team.
bleachedraven 14
Wow, awful.
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Comments (4)
cuz803 46
Sucks your mom is like that apparently. Your dad is also a hero for taking one for the team.
bleachedraven 14
Wow, awful.
princess_stabitty 20
Oh right, your mother really must be mother of the year because of that....
DarkAngelsBlade 25
At least your dad loves you right?