Today, my mom accused me of being pregnant. She wouldn't believe me when I told her I'm a virgin, and she challenged me to take a pregnancy test. It came back with a false positive. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I threw up when I woke up, feeling quite ill, I told my mum. She instantly thought I was pregnant. I'm still a virgin and she doesn't believe me. FML
Today, my mom came into my room, yelling at me about a pregnancy test that she found in my bathroom. My mom wouldn't believe me when I said it wasn't mine. Turns out my sister bought the test, threw it under my bathroom cabinet, and now she won't admit to the prank. She thinks this is hilarious. FML
Today, I took a pregnancy test. When I saw that the result was positive, I started crying and showed my mom. She burst out laughing and told me that I had taken an ovulation test. FML
Today, I mentioned to my mum that one of my friends is pregnant. She decided I was lying, that I'm the one who's actually pregnant, and that I'm going to get checked out by a doctor. FML
Today, my mother got heartburn. She claimed she only gets heartburn when she is near a pregnant woman. She threatened to kick me out of the house if I didn't take a pregnancy test, despite there being no way I was pregnant. Turns out, I am pregnant, and my mother's ego has never been bigger. FML
Today, I had to go through the embarrassment and pain of telling my parents I was pregnant. I took the test and it came out positive and I was freaking out. I got grounded for the rest of the year and they're really disappointed in me. Five minutes ago, I got my period. FML
Today, I went to see a doctor because I have been experiencing hair loss. He insisted on a pregnancy test. My parents then grounded me. I'm a virgin. FML
Today, I came out to my mom as a lesbian. She told me that it was impossible, because since she isn't one, she therefore couldn't have given birth to one. She still won't believe me. FML
Today, a misunderstanding led to me falsely accusing my husband of cheating. We cleared it up and he forgave me and everything, but my parents are still convinced that he cheated, and won't believe me when I say he wasn't. FML
Today, after much deliberation, I decided to accept my parents' invitation to a family dinner. A half hour after I arrived, all hell broke loose, because my mom's pregnancy test had come back positive, and she was convinced my dad had poked holes in his own condom. FML
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Top comments
Capt_Oblivious 10
Abstinence: 99.99% effective.
satanisthesavior 21
Take another test then. And another. Eventually you will prove you're not pregnant.
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Comments (45)
EVnIAS 13
I did!
scottyspot 11
What caused her to think you were pregnant in the first place? Until I know that one it will be hard to select either FYL or YDI.
Glitter_taco_ 10
Wait your mom thought you were pregnant, but you aren't? So she thinks that you're fat? Smack that bitch!
shaww 28
Mom: Positive? OHHHHHHH OP: Wait, its false, I'll try again! *Positive* Mom: OHHH *Repeat*
Hiphuray4peas 27
False positives almost never happen with pregnancy tests. They also usually mean there's an underlying medical condition. See a doctor.
jeepers_1 21
That's not actually true, that's why they suggest checking with your doctor to make sure you actually are. Pregnancy tests check for a specific hormone, and sometimes it thinks its there but it's not, the only for sure pregnancy test is a blood test
Hiphuray4peas 27
I disagree. No matter what a doctor visit is necessary.
demonFox 10
My mother does the same thing, especially when I want pickles. which I've like since I was 5. According to her logic, I've been pregnant for 10 years and I'm not even showing. I think our mothers have been watching too much MTV.
jeepers_1 21
Well next time you have your period you could always show her? I mean its pretty obvious you're not pregnant then.
noreallywhat 17
Go to the doctor for a check up not to be tested for pregnancy but because the false positive could indicate a medical condition. Your moms crazy may have helped saved your life
krisanda 5
I call bullshit on this FML post. False positives only happen if you didn't take the test correctly or if you're receiving infertility treatments. False negative? That can happen all the time. False positive? Yeah, right. Look it up.
brittany1143 5
I've had that happen to me! It sucks when your mom won't stop telling your family that her 16 year old is pregnant