Today, my little sister started freaking out, because she was playing with some white-out eraser and got some on her finger. She started crying inconsolably because she thought her entire finger was going to disappear. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, my little sister was playing with her building blocks. All of a sudden, she began to cry and held her finger out to me. Assuming she had hurt it, I kissed it better, and tasted something odd on my lips. Turns out she wasn't hurt, she was crying because she had touched cat vomit. FML
Revenge
Today, because I wouldn’t let my little sister have any more cookies, she snuck into my room while I was sleeping and superglued my lips together. FML
Today, my little sister put on some black eyeliner on my eyes. About half an hour later, my eyes started to hurt. Eyeliner never hurt for me; so I went to the bathroom to check it out. My sister wasn't using eyeliner. It was a black watercolor pencil. Now I have black bits inside my eyes. FML
Today, my sister thought it would be funny to place a cardboard cut-out of a person at the foot of my bed. I woke up, saw the cut-out from the corner of my eye, fell out of bed, landed on my hand wrong, and broke two fingers. She got it all on video. FML
Today, my mom sat on a pencil and started bleeding. She then made me clean the wound on her butt and put ointment on it. FML
Today, my girlfriend helped me apply liquid bandaid over an open wound. Unfortunately, she grabbed the liquid wart remover instead. FML
Experimental
Today, while showering, I pulled on my white exfoliating gloves ready to wash my face. As I was about to use them, a dark stain caught my eye so I sniffed the mark, only to discover it was poop. After further investigation, I found out my younger sister had been wearing them and "experimenting". FML
Today, I accidentally sat on my sister's imaginary monkey. She then stabbed me with a pencil. I still can't get the piece of graphite out of my hand. FML
How many cans did I have last night?
Today, as I peeled a now soggy Band-Aid off my finger, I discovered that in the dim light of yesterday evening, I had, with great anxiety, wrapped it around the wrong finger. FML
Today, to avoid walking on a thumbtack that had fallen on the floor, my little sister took a red sharpie to the carpet and drew a circle around it, "so that way, everyone will see it." FML
Top comments
Cortezthe1st 23
Did you play along?
Bekll 31
You should do that trick where your thumb disappears from one hand and say it's already starting to happen to you because you got it on your thumb also.
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Comments (71)
Cortezthe1st 23
Did you play along?
winter_under_ice 18
If I were OP, I would convince the whole family to play along.
\ 28
While I'm all for having a good laugh, I don't think putting a kid that young under that kind of stress is the best way to go. That's how people develop phobias of Wite-Out.
cwrocker 14
Plot twist:They are sketches in a sketchbook
Wyaru 9
My family and I once pretended that my 5 year old niece disappeared from existence. We eventually felt bad for her after she started to worry too much, and cut it off.
PieReaper 11
Holy **** this isn't the parenting corner 17 and besides I don't think the child would develop a phobia over a ******* joke
jake_braves 25
"Oh no!! :O where is your finger? I don't see it!" Haha priceless
DutchRogue 12
That will make for a great story to pester her with when she gets older.
cakefete2 31
I agree, this is one of the privileges of being an older sibling. My older sister tells a story that one day she was messing with me as a child, and in a rage, I said "I can't wait to get bigger, 'cuz when we're the same age you can't mess with me anymore!" I have since learned, however, once someone is older than you, they stay older than you instead of "waiting" for you to catch up.
ukeandfoodislife 19
Yeah my sister still teases me about stuff. It's awful
lexiieeex3 32
Exactly. It's actually really adorable.
hxnnxh 14
Definitely something to bring up on her 18th birthday!
Bekll 31
You should do that trick where your thumb disappears from one hand and say it's already starting to happen to you because you got it on your thumb also.
thevelociraptor 31
:O Your an evil genius.
spatula232 25
Don't blame her, that shit's scary, it gets everywhere
sweetbliss3 37
its whiteout. whiteout doesnt get everywhere. youre thinking of glitter. that shit gets everywhere.
UO88 10
50, Glitter: The herpes of craft supplies.
cailey1234567890 24
Aww Thats adorable
rosheno 4
Maybe I'm just a bad brother, but I'd go along with it and get the rest of my family in on it. :3
ukeandfoodislife 19
My sister tricked me into thinking the vacuum cleaner was an alligator and would eat me alive if it came too close to me. I was 4. Yeah. Siblings are awful.
ukeandfoodislife 19
When I was 4, my sister tricked me into thinking the vacuum cleaner was an alligator. I thought I would die if I got too close. Yeah. Siblings can be mean for sure
ukeandfoodislife 19
I don't know why that went twice^ I'm sorry!
glabberfasted 16
Because you posted twice? That's clearly 2 differently written comments haha
thatguynamedsky 32
I looks like she posted one and then another because the first one didn't show up :p
greeneyebeauty9 28
Aw, in my opinion that's kind of cute. depending on how old she is.
cakefete2 31
Good point. It's adorable at 4. Not so much at 14. You see, adorability and age are inversely proportionate one to the other... Where did this lab coat and chemistry set come from?!
gjikvtj 18
You're a mental scientist now, Cake. This is your destiny.
ukeandfoodislife 19
31: your profile picture has me rubbing my screen. Every. Time.
domking1315 20
Draw on her legs and convince her she's floating
loathingloser 14
I think my nose is gonna disappear when I do that with cocaine
worldclassrager 41
Maybe a little skin tone paint will keep it there...time will tell