Today, my little sister started freaking out, because she was playing with some white-out eraser and got some on her finger. She started crying inconsolably because she thought her entire finger was going to disappear. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, my little sister was playing with her building blocks. All of a sudden, she began to cry and held her finger out to me. Assuming she had hurt it, I kissed it better, and tasted something odd on my lips. Turns out she wasn't hurt, she was crying because she had touched cat vomit. FML
Revenge
Today, because I wouldn’t let my little sister have any more cookies, she snuck into my room while I was sleeping and superglued my lips together. FML
Today, my little sister put on some black eyeliner on my eyes. About half an hour later, my eyes started to hurt. Eyeliner never hurt for me; so I went to the bathroom to check it out. My sister wasn't using eyeliner. It was a black watercolor pencil. Now I have black bits inside my eyes. FML
Today, my sister thought it would be funny to place a cardboard cut-out of a person at the foot of my bed. I woke up, saw the cut-out from the corner of my eye, fell out of bed, landed on my hand wrong, and broke two fingers. She got it all on video. FML
Today, my mom sat on a pencil and started bleeding. She then made me clean the wound on her butt and put ointment on it. FML
Today, my girlfriend helped me apply liquid bandaid over an open wound. Unfortunately, she grabbed the liquid wart remover instead. FML
Experimental
Today, while showering, I pulled on my white exfoliating gloves ready to wash my face. As I was about to use them, a dark stain caught my eye so I sniffed the mark, only to discover it was poop. After further investigation, I found out my younger sister had been wearing them and "experimenting". FML
Today, I accidentally sat on my sister's imaginary monkey. She then stabbed me with a pencil. I still can't get the piece of graphite out of my hand. FML
How many cans did I have last night?
Today, as I peeled a now soggy Band-Aid off my finger, I discovered that in the dim light of yesterday evening, I had, with great anxiety, wrapped it around the wrong finger. FML
Today, to avoid walking on a thumbtack that had fallen on the floor, my little sister took a red sharpie to the carpet and drew a circle around it, "so that way, everyone will see it." FML
Top comments
Cortezthe1st 23
Did you play along?
Bekll 31
You should do that trick where your thumb disappears from one hand and say it's already starting to happen to you because you got it on your thumb also.
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Comments (71)
aimzskee 30
Aww how adorable
ily53012 3
This Is One Of The Cutest FML I Have Read Yet Today. Aw (:
DivinePrince 18
I don't think it is fun to play with people's fears. She seems to be actually convinced her finger will go. How would you feel if you were damn sure you're finger was going to be amputated? I have 2 Anxiety Disorders, I used to think I was dying whenever I had a nosebleed as a kid. It's not fun. no one took me seriously- and now I'm on pills.
Schala360 27
its not like you were a genius when you were little
izneth 4
Lol super cute!
CaroAurelia 12
Well, how old is she? If she's little, it's cute. If she's older than ten... I don't know what to say.
daniellekimberly 23
That sucks, but depending on her age, kinda cute. I'm sure you'll laugh about it in the long run